October 29, 2002 5:34 AM

Hey, hey, we're the Bungles! (Chapter 2)

Bengals guarantee a victory against Texans

Let me just say for the record that Dick LeBeau is an idiot.

The league's only winless team is short on victories, but not on nerve. After a 30-24 loss to Tennessee, coach Dick LeBeau brashly predicted a victory next Sunday in Houston.

Given a chance to take it back a day later, LeBeau didn't back down.

"I think this team's going to start winning,'' LeBeau said Monday. "I think we played a hard game, a competitive game, and we did as much as the other team did. We just didn't win the game.

"I think the result will be different in the very near future. I'll make that prediction.''....

LeBeau was even more emphatic on the subject after Sunday's loss, which ended with a memorable Bengal blunder. Pulling guard Matt O'Dwyer tripped Corey Dillon inches short of the goal line with 68 seconds left, dropping the Bengals to 0-7 for the fourth time since 1991.

LeBeau sounded a little like Joe Namath as he summed up the game and looked ahead.

"I thought the team fought. We had every opportunity to win, and next week we will win,'' he said, delivering the last line with extra emotion.

Asked whether that amounted to a prediction, LeBeau said, "I believe this team is going to win.''....

A loss by the Bengals would clinch a 12th straight season without a winning record. Cincinnati is 53-130 since 1991, the worst record in the NFL over that span.

C'mon, give me a break here. You're 0-7, one of the worst teams in the history of the NFL, and you're guaranteeing a victory? Hey, was that a pig that just flew overhead?? LeBeau ought to figure out how to get a grip on reality. The time to be boastful is when you can back it up, not when your team is making a career out of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. No wonder Hamilton County is considering suing the Bungles for breach of contract.

A loss by the Bengals would clinch a 12th straight season without a winning record. Cincinnati is 53-130 since 1991, the worst record in the NFL over that span.

I feel sorry for the people of Cincinnati. The Bengals have not only lost more than their share, they invent creative ways to let games slip from their grasp. Even with a new stadium, their ineptitude has reached staggering levels. For anyone associated with the Bungles to guarantee a win is the height of hubris, if not a complete lack of a sense of reality. Get a grip....

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on October 29, 2002 5:34 AM.

Scenes from our secure Republic was the previous entry in this blog.

Prepare to say goodbye to a rundown tourist attraction is the next entry in this blog.

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