The worst crime against humanity is a weak cup of coffee.
- David Letterman
Words to ponder as I sit at my kitchen table, trying to decide whether my throbbing head will hold up during a busy day at work. The coffee isn't making a dent, and my head feels as if it's about to explode. Even the medication I normally take for my migraines doesn't seem to be doing it's thing.
I know what a big part of the problem is. My job can be, and often is, be very stressful. Many people want and/or need something from me, usually at the same time, and they all want it YESTERDAY, and if that isn't possible, then NOW. It's not a particularly difficult job, but there are a tremendous amount of details to keep straight, and it can be virtually impossible to keep from making a mistake (or several mistakes). When I do make a mistake I have attorneys yapping at me, people demanding the unreasonable, or people just simply taking their frustrations out on me- one woman even filed a formal complaint calling me a racist. No one took it seriously (thankfully), but that one hurt.
My challenge has been learning how to deal with the stress, and it seems clear that I'm not dealing with it as well as I need to. Each night this week, I've come home with a migraine, and last night's was the worst of the lot. No matter that I cannot keep up with the workload I have; more keeps coming. Then I have people callling me, wondering why I haven't done what I'm supposed to have already done. Well, perhaps because there is only so much of me to go around, eh?
I'm not particularly enamored of my job, but it is a stepping stone to get into something that I might enjoy more. The company I work for is, generally speaking, a good company to work for. Everyone in the company starts at the bottom, as it were, to gain experience. I have no problem with that idea. My problem is being continually overloaded. No wonder I come home with headaches.
I'm good at my job, and if the workload were managed, I know that I could deal with it effectively. My problem now is how long can I continue to cope with things as they are? How long do I continue to deal with this stress and the effect it has on me in order to do what I need to do so that I can help support my family?
As I sit here nursing my last cup of coffee, I don't have any answers. I've been told frequently that things will change, but the finish line keeps getting moved. Yes, it's frustrating, but the bottom line is that I feel fortunate to simply have a job. Today I'm staying home to nurse my aching head. Tomorrow will be another day. I only hope it will be a better one (insert chorus to "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow" Here....).
