OK, so I'm a little late with this one. Still, I needed a good laugh, and this certainly did the trick....
Today, America is once again threatened by an unseen, all-pervasive menace which corrupts and destroys all that it touches. No, I'm not talking about Joe McCarthy's Communism. And no, I'm not talking about terrorism, either. I'm talking about critical thinking, open dialogue and dissent. But not unlike the red menace of Communism, this sickening new pink menace can and will be eradicated from the planet. Sure, there are those who would argue that Communism remains a reality for more than half the world's population, but I'm only counting real people here – no Chinkies or Cubo-Ricans.
Were he alive today, Senator McCarthy would be approaching his 96th birthday. And though he'd likely be about as continent as Strom Thurmond at a kegger, he would also no doubt be proud. Proud to see how far we've come, and how close we are to realizing his vision of a quasi-Orwellian parody state. For you see, Senator McCarthy was a man years ahead of his time. Things were different back when he was in Congress. There was no FOX News around to heed his call to spin his enemies' words and positions into hard evidence of ideological treason – which, in an earlier, more wholesome era, would have been grounds enough for lifetime imprisonment. Nor was there any Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity to work in tandem with FOX News and whip up the entire corn and Bible belts into a paranoia-fueled rage so white-hot and irrational, they'd be hard-pressed to make it through jury selection on a 17th Century witchcraft trial. But worst of all for poor Joe, the Senate of the 1950's actually included a number of Democrats who were also... vertebrates.
How things change in just 46 short years! Why, just imagine what old Joe could be accomplishing in today's America. Come to think of it, you don't need to imagine. All you have to do is try talking [$&#@] about me in public for more than five seconds and see what happens. And they said mob lynchings and blacklists had gone out of style!
The truly sad thing about this parody is that there is a kernel of truth contained within. Laugh if you must, but I'm also more than a little bit worried.
