September 26, 2003 6:25 AM

Another DUMASS AWARD wiener

Parents seek to ban books

DUMASS AWARD wiener #19: Julie Wilde

A parent's zeal to protect their children from unhealthy influences is in the final analysis that parent's perogative. Most parents do a fairly objective and reasonable job. Then there are those maroons that should under no circumstances be allowed to breed. Unfortunately, these DUMASSES live in our Great State of Texas. Public enemy #1 is Julie Wilde, who apparently wouldn't know great literature if it bit her on the ass.

MERCEDES — Four parents of Science Academy sophomores are determined to protect their children.

From books.

The board of directors for the South Texas Independent School District is expected to decide tonight whether to ban two books — Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World and Robert Heinlein’s Stranger in a Strange Land — from the high school’s 10th grade English Advanced Placement curriculum.

The books, part of the class’ summer reading list, may lead to “inappropriate sexual arousal of young teens,” parent Julie Wilde wrote in her complaint to the district. “We feel this is inappropriate for the ages of the students at (the) Science Academy or at any South Texas ISD High School,” she continued in her letter, specifically citing Brave New World. “This is pornographic literature and we do not feel it has a place in any school funded by taxpayer dollars.”

Under school district policies, parents have the right to object to their children’s reading materials, and to obtain alternatives to those materials. However, “A parent’s ability to exercise control over reading, listening, or viewing matter extends only to his or her own children,” the policies state under the section Guiding Principles. “When instructional resources are challenged, the principles of the freedom to read, listen, and view must be defended as well.”

As part of the district’s grievance process, the Science Academy’s principal first addressed the complaint. He formed a committee to reassess the materials — all of which have been in use for at least a decade at the district.

Ideas are not the enemy here, Ms. Wilde. The real enemy are DUMASSES such as yourself, who are convinced that any concept they do not understand is the instrument of Satan. Being a true DUMASS, of course, means never having to say you're sorry for your utter and complete lack of native intelligence.

An honorable mention DUMASS AWARD should also go to the board of directors for the South Texas Independent School District for even entertaining this half-assed assault on free speech. Thanks to you, maroons like Ms. Wilde have a soapbox.

Unless we stand up to know-nothings like Ms. Wilde and her ilk, we run the risk of seeing ourselves returned to something resembling the set of "Pleasantville". Our children deserve to be exposed to great literature. Without being exposed to literature, where and how will our children learn to dream and develop their imagination? Where will they learn about things they will never find in a classroom? How will they break out of "Pleasantville"?

Congratulations, Ms. Wilde. Wear your DUMASS AWARD with pride. Then again, I imagine you're probably opposed to pride, aren't you?

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on September 26, 2003 6:25 AM.

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