Britney moving up on the hate parade
OK, it's the day after Thanksgiving. You managed to wheedle and whine your way into getting the day off from work. Still, you really don't want to go shopping and face the Mongol hordes at WalMart. What's a faithful American consumer to do? Well, how's 'bout doin' some hatin'?? I've got just the thing for you....
Google on "Britney hater" and you get 9,000 hits. Go to the CNN Web site and learn, from a Quick Vote poll earlier this month, that one out of three visitors enjoys Britney while the rest say she's either "living off her past glory" or is "about ready for the 'Where Are You Now' file."
Karen Kreutzberg, a Navy commander with an 11-year-old daughter, Kara, tries to be polite by calling Spears "lightweight," then adds, "Don't get me started."
Britney rage isn't confined to custodians of the cradle, but there were a lot of parents silently cheering when they heard that Maryland's first lady, Kendel Ehrlich, pumped up a crowd last month by saying, "If I had an opportunity to shoot Britney Spears, I think I would."
Maybe moms are jealous that at 21 Britney looks better in boy briefs than they do or ever did.
But it's more than that. You don't hear the same comments about hotties like J. Lo or Xtina (otherwise known as Jennifer Lopez and Christina Aguilera. At least Britney has kept a full name -- so far). Over the five years of her pop career, Britney has come to epitomize the widespread belief that there's something rotten in girl culture, something that tells girls that their bodies, not their brains, are the means to power and success, especially if they're wrapped in skintight pants that stop just above the pubic bone.
Britney popularized the slut strut in music videos assembled by a former porn director and single-handedly wiped out the Spice Girls. Short skirts became known as "Britney skirts." Young girls grabbed Teen People off the newsstands when Britney was on the cover, packed Britney look-alike contests and Britney concerts.
Girls, especially pre-pubescent girls, want desperately to grow up. Britney gave them a way to do that. At the tender ages of 8, 9 and 10 they became thong feminists singing that they would do whatever it takes to snag a man. This drove older, pantsuit feminists crazy.
Did we work our way into America's boardrooms for this, the pantsuits asked.
Every quote that came out of Britney's mouth confirmed their impression that she was a lightweight.
"I like lighthearted, girl-flick, love-story movies," she told the Associated Press. "It's easy to watch, not that deep."
Newsweek quotes Britney saying she's "been into a lot of Indian spiritual religions." Is Hinduism one of them? She replies: "What's that? Is it like kabbalah?"
She told the German magazine Cinema that Heaven is a place where "everyone is at peace and happy, and they all hop around from cloud to cloud."
Aaagghhh.... Well, that ought to keep you busy for awhile, eh?
Sorry, I've got to go. I think I just sprained my IQ....
