August 3, 2004 5:17 AM

Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener

Police Nab Husband of Missing Utah Woman

DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener #131: Mark Hacking

Perhaps this one should be subtitled "Stoopid Kriminul Trix". Hacking, a graduate of the Susan Smith School of Homicide, has apparently failed his final exam. Too bad (for him, at least) that there are no refresher courses available.

SALT LAKE CITY -- A man whose credibility began crumbling the day he first reported his pregnant wife missing was arrested Monday in her death, just before his scheduled release from a psychiatric ward.

Investigators believe Lori Hacking, 27, was killed in the couple's apartment and that her body is buried somewhere below 3,000 tons of trash at the county landfill. The landfill was expected to be searched again Wednesday.

Her husband, Mark Hacking, reported her missing July 19. He was hospitalized when he was seen running around naked outside a motel where he had taken a room, hours after making an emotional appeal on television that day for help in searching for her.

Although Lori Hacking's body has not been found, police said they had gathered enough evidence -- including the murder weapon -- to bring charges against her husband.

Like Smith, Hacking went on TV and made an emotional appeal to throw the public and police off track. Where Hacking went wrong is that, if you've killed your wife, it's generally a good idea to lay low and avoid attracting attention. Running around naked outside a motel room is a good way to get a good deal of suspicion focused in your direction.

Insufficient preparation, lack of emotionally stability, and generally being a DUMB@$$ all contributed to Hacking's downfall. Hey, not everyone has what it takes to be a murderer. This is a good thing. Thankfully, though, plenty of folks have what it takes to be a DUMB@$$, because the bar is quite frankly set rather low.

The sad thing, of course, is that Lori Hacking is dead and two families are forever changed- and there is nothing funny in that. You'd think that Mark Hacking could have found a way short of murdering his wife in order to work out whatever issues existed in his marriage. Instead, he serves as proof that felonies and DUMB@$$E$ are seldom successful and productive combinations.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on August 3, 2004 5:17 AM.

It seems not everyone is happy that the RNC is coming to town was the previous entry in this blog.

Politics does make for strange bedfellows, eh? is the next entry in this blog.

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