December 8, 2004 6:48 AM

Not that we're ashamed of who we are or anything....

Traveling abroad? Disguise yourself as Canadian

Imperialism has it’s price, and part of it apparently is universal opprobium. Strangely enough, we’re not too terribly popular in the rest of the world. Hmmm…d’ya think it might have something to do with invading sovereign countries under false pretenses and then acting as if we’re making the world safe for democracy? Now we have to travel incognito?

Actually, I’ve done this sort of thing before. When I lived in Cyprus and was travelling through the Middle East, I basically pretended I was Canadian. It wasn’t difficult; I grew up in northern Minnesota two hours south of the Canadian border. Hell, when I moved to Portland, OR, people asked me if I was Canadian. I had a very pronounced Minnesota accent, which, if you’re not listening too closely, sounds vaguely Canadian.

I made certain that I didn’t wear anything that obviously identified me as an American- no college sweatshirts, etc. At that time- this was the mid-80s- being an American travelling in the Middle East wasn’t always a way to win friends and influence enemies. Since I could pass as Canadian (until I pulled out my American passport), I took advantage of it, and I was able to extricate myself from a couple of uncomfortable situations.

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. - Planning a European vacation and don’t want to talk American politics with an inquisitive foreigner? A New Mexico T-shirt company suggests going Canadian.

For $24.95, T-shirtKing.com offers the “Go Canadian” package, full of just the kind of things an American traveler can use to keep a vacation free of U.S. politics.

There’s a Canadian flag T-shirt, a Canadian flag lapel pin and a Canadian patch for luggage or a backpack. There’s also a quick reference guide — “How to Speak Canadian, Eh?” — on answering questions about Canada.

Now that I’ve been away for Minnesota for most of the past 20 years, I probably couldnt’ get away with this charade as easily. It is interesting, though, how things have come back around since the beginning of the war in Iraq.

Oh, and learning to love hockey would help. It’s always good to know the difference between a face-off and a hip check. Next, find yourself a pair of Sorels, a toque, and no one will ever know the difference, eh?

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on December 8, 2004 6:48 AM.

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