April 2005 Archives

April 30, 2005
Attractive wealthy white woman found alive!!! Film at 11!!!
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April 30, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 21
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April 30, 2005
Bend over, Red Rover
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April 30, 2005
So when is a good thing NOT a good thing? Just about anytime "Wal-Mart" is attached to it.
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April 30, 2005
So, Our Sainted President is a (not so) closeted petrosexual??
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April 29, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 20
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April 29, 2005
Welcome the new boss...same as the old boss....
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April 29, 2005
Anybody want to check Brat for a pulse? (#3)
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April 29, 2005
Nine words that warm my cynical black heart....
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April 29, 2005
Because you wouldn't turn left onto a one-way street
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April 29, 2005
Diversity is great- as long as you think like they do
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April 29, 2005
Time to take a stand (pun thoroughly intended)
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April 28, 2005
It was good enough to get elected, eh??
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April 28, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 19
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April 28, 2005
So why couldn't y'all have figured this out prior to Election Day?
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April 28, 2005
If the First Amendment were a rock, this would be the ugly underside
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April 28, 2005
We can't conquer the world if y'all are too busy gettin' busy
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April 28, 2005
One nation, under God...as long as you're wealthy, White, and narrowly Conservative
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April 27, 2005
What else are you going to do over San Antonio??
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April 27, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 18
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April 27, 2005
Taking care of the things that REALLY matter
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April 27, 2005
THIS is what these maroons were elected to do?
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April 27, 2005
Better to be thought a f*****g moron....
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April 26, 2005
Your world...the rest of us are just paying rent
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April 26, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 17
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April 26, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 26, 2005
Because Josef Goebbels was right
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April 26, 2005
And I suppose Bill Frist is to blame....
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April 26, 2005
After all, Jesus votes Republican
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April 25, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 16
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April 25, 2005
This is what happens when the line between faith and ignorance is erased
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April 25, 2005
Perhaps the greatest genocide you've never heard of
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April 25, 2005
Well, where there's smoke, there's...denial of reality?
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April 24, 2005
Because it's Tom DeLay's world...the rest of us are just paying rent
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April 24, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 24, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 15
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April 24, 2005
The answer to the question, "So, why DO guys like beach volleyball so much??" (Exhibit R)
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April 23, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 14
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April 23, 2005
Human trash or human reclamation project?
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April 23, 2005
And the truth shall set you free...or not
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April 23, 2005
Can't you just FEEL the safety and security? I know I can't.
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April 22, 2005
Being a Republican means never having to say you're sorry
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April 22, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 13
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April 22, 2005
Who knew that driving while brown is a crime??
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April 22, 2005
It ain't easy being pretty, #2
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April 22, 2005
We're the government, and we're here to...aw, fuhgeddaboudit
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April 22, 2005
Ethics? We don't need your stinkin' ethics....
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April 21, 2005
So what are our sons and daughters really dying for??
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April 21, 2005
Now THIS is a long-distance love affair
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April 21, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 12
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April 21, 2005
Hmm...Lord & Savior or Social Safety Net? You make the call....
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April 21, 2005
Once we start down this road, there's no turning back
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April 21, 2005
Because his dealer wouldn't take American Express?
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April 20, 2005
The President that gave us peace, prosperity, low unemployment, high stock market and the best economy ever
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April 20, 2005
Methinks perhaps someone needs a hobby? Or perhaps this is it?
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April 20, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 11
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April 20, 2005
Finally, we can announce the question that Cardinal Ratzinger answered correctly to win the Papal Sweepstakes
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April 20, 2005
I know; it must have been a slow news day in London
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April 20, 2005
Yeah, but ya gotta love the mustache, eh??
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April 19, 2005
The man who would be King
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April 19, 2005
The Conclave, Day 2: Things are getting silly
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April 19, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 10
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April 19, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 19, 2005
Yeah, but you have the bounteous death benefit to enjoy, eh??
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April 19, 2005
When a newsmagazine crosses the line to propaganda rag
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April 18, 2005
And all this time people thought I talked funny....
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April 18, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 18, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 9
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April 18, 2005
Breaking news from the Vatican
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April 18, 2005
Just wait 'til they begin herding us into the labor and re-education camps
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April 18, 2005
Level 11 Tinfoil Helmet Alert now in effect
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April 17, 2005
OK...so that's what all those American soldiers died for....
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April 17, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 8
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April 17, 2005
We have ALWAYS been at war with Eurasia....
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April 17, 2005
I can tell you where one good Christian is- I wake up next to her every morning
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April 17, 2005
The answer to the question, "So, why DO guys like beach volleyball so much??" (Exhibit P)
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April 16, 2005
And this is why I don't post many pictures of myself....
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April 16, 2005
Yep...the NRA must be in town
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April 16, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 7
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April 16, 2005
A math major's wet dream
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April 16, 2005
Level 6 Tinfoil Helmet Alert now in effect
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April 16, 2005
Damn...I think I grew up in the wrong era
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April 16, 2005
Do I call the copy repair guy or the vet??
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April 15, 2005
Righteous indignation sure makes for great political theater, eh??
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April 15, 2005
Level 4 Tinfoil Helmet alert now in effect....
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April 15, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 6
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April 15, 2005
Pucker up, y'all...it's time to play softball
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April 15, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 15, 2005
Why, yes, I AM king of all I survey, thank you....
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April 15, 2005
Because if you don't, the terrorists will win
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April 14, 2005
But it's OK to legislate from the bench if you're a Social Conservative
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April 14, 2005
Yeah...the truth sucks, eh?
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April 14, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 5
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April 14, 2005
He's still looking for a copy of "Everybody Wants To Rule The World"
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April 14, 2005
Support our troops...hey, we have a magnetic yellow ribbon on the back of our SUV, don't we??
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April 14, 2005
Meanwhile, here on Planet Earth, we understand that "Tom DeLay" will never appear in the same sentence as "limited resources"
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April 13, 2005
Nothing like exposing your vacantness and cluelessness on the world stage, eh?
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April 13, 2005
Look who's back....
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April 13, 2005
This week's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us
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April 13, 2005
And if he were a Democrat, he would have been impeached by now
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April 13, 2005
Dignity, grace, and class: not things you'd normally associate with the Yankees
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April 13, 2005
So perhaps the message is that the Vatican cares more about the perpetrators than the victims??
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April 12, 2005
This is newsworthy...why, exactly??
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April 12, 2005
I assume you had a good reason for awakening me??
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April 12, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 4
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April 12, 2005
Karma can be a real b---h, no??
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April 12, 2005
Hey, at least it wasn't the Black Angel of Death
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April 12, 2005
At least they can recognize Evil when they see it
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April 11, 2005
Happy Monday, y'all....
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April 11, 2005
Being a member of the Catholic clergy means never having to say that you're sorry
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April 11, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 3
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April 11, 2005
It's not easy being pretty, #1
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April 11, 2005
Next on Eyewitness News: Matter negotiates peace treaty with Anti-Matter
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April 10, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue, Chapter 2
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April 10, 2005
Back in the saddle again
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April 10, 2005
The devil is in the details, no?
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April 10, 2005
Uh...it's a truck bed, NOT a cat bed....
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April 9, 2005
What happened to the real news...didn't the Pope just die or something??
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April 9, 2005
My favorite memory of Pope John Paul II
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April 9, 2005
Coming soon: online political assassinations
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April 9, 2005
When is the truth not the truth? When it's about the money....
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April 9, 2005
Don't hate me because I'm beautiful
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April 9, 2005
I know; I can't believe I'm quoting Dennis Miller, either
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April 8, 2005
Don't ask, don't tell...but the hypocrites will get you anyway
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April 8, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 8, 2005
Someone needs to check Mack for a pulse, #2
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April 8, 2005
Find a good thing, homogenize it, and strangle the life out of it
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April 8, 2005
Of course, fire and brimstone DOES make for better political theater
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April 7, 2005
Damn...and I was so looking forward to visiting Vicodinland....
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April 7, 2005
This is exactly why no Republican bothers to think on the Senate floor
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April 7, 2005
Someone needs to check Mack for a pulse, #1
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April 7, 2005
Being Republican means never having to say you're sorry
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April 7, 2005
Particularly if they're wealthy, white, and Republican
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April 6, 2005
Welcome to TPRS, a member of....
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April 6, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 6, 2005
They came, they saw, they probably had a good nap
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April 6, 2005
Whatever it takes....
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April 6, 2005
Wow....
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April 6, 2005
So what does that say about those who voted for him?
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April 5, 2005
For those of you who want to hear Jack pontificate at length about subjects he knows little about, here's your sign....
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April 5, 2005
No, I'm not an attention whore, but I do play one on TV
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April 5, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 5, 2005
Anyone know where I can find a Fisker's Anonymous chapter 'round here??
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April 5, 2005
And this is why I never pay retail
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April 4, 2005
Time to find another martyr, y'all....
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April 4, 2005
How difficult is it to treat someone well? Apparently, moreso than you might think.
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April 4, 2005
And it couldn't have happened to a nicer demagogue
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April 4, 2005
Say hello to the few, the (not so very) proud, the child sex offenders in my neck of the woods
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April 4, 2005
Nothing like manufacturing some faux outrage on a slow news day
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April 4, 2005
It's breakfast time
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April 3, 2005
The prognosis is not good
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April 3, 2005
A man who was many things to many people...not all of them good
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April 3, 2005
Yes, Virginia, there is something even worse than Retail Hell
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April 3, 2005
Some face time for the world's best dog, #3
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April 3, 2005
I'm going to have to learn how to play the guitar just so I can sing this
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April 2, 2005
Get a roll of stamps and mail it in, y'all....
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April 2, 2005
T minus 2 days until life begins again
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April 2, 2005
Finally...a useful skill
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April 2, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 2, 2005
Her death is only the beginning.
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April 2, 2005
Dlia chego nam nuzhen Donetskii bassein
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April 1, 2005
So, is this a red flag that will trigger an audit??
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April 1, 2005
Just about the worst April Fools joke imaginable
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April 1, 2005
Farewell to a man of unsurpassing grace, class, and dignity. We will not see a man like him anytime soon.
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April 1, 2005
You didn't actually plan on driving this, did you??
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April 1, 2005
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
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April 1, 2005
Our brave men and women, protecting our freedom to clog our arteries and expand our considerable waistlines
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April 1, 2005
Or maybe it's the fact that he's a demagogue, a liar, and a murderer?
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