MALE CALL: Tips for getting over ‘Brokeback’ hump
You’re a progressive Bay Area guy. You support same-sex marriage, you invite your gay co-workers to parties and you think that English dude who played Magneto in “X-Men” is a hell of a good actor. Hey, you might even own a Morrissey album or two. So why haven’t you seen “Brokeback Mountain” yet?…. [I]f you listen to talk radio, the guys at the office or the typical men’s league softball team, there’s one key demographic — straight men ages 18 to 54 — who can’t seem to get over their insecurities and take those last few steps to see this landmark film.
I can understand what the fuss is about “Brokeback Mountain”, and I wouldn’t mind seeing it sometime, but I have a real problem with the phemenon of this movie being viewed as a litmus test for male sexual insecurity. Personally, I don’t much care if the movie has cowboy-on-cowboy sex. They could be buggering goats if it happened to be integral to the story (which, thankfully, it’s not). It’s just that there are a lot of other movies out there I want to see first (F’rinstance, She Who Endures My Myriad Eccentricities and I saw “The Matador” last weekend…LOVED IT…). “Brokeback Mountain” is a movie, not a ruler for judging male sexual insecurities. If you want to see it, knock yourself out, and I hope you enjoy yourself. That’s where it ends, though.
Though I can understand that because of the subject matter, “Brokeback Mountain” is not your average “date movie”, those who focus on the homosexual aspect of the story may well be missing the point. Friends who have seen it tell me that it’s an excellent story that just happens to incorporate homosexuality as part of the plot. Some folks may have an issue with that, and that’s their perogative. This being a free country and all, no one is going to force anyone to see the movie if they don’t want to.
It’s a strange phobia, considering that “Brokeback Mountain” may be the best date movie to come along in years. You have the potential to look so sensitive that you can probably get her to pay for the movie and a trip to Red Lobster. Add a few tears near the ending (just think about that scene in “Rudy” where underdog Rudy leads the Notre Dame Irish on the field), and you might be surprised where the evening takes you. Think make-up sex is great? Try some you-just-took-me-to-“Brokeback Mountain” sex.
What makes fear of “Brokeback” even more odd are the misconceptions that have developed among those who haven’t seen the film. On top of being the favorite movie of the year of many critics, Ang Lee’s film has mistakenly received a reputation as some kind of nonstop guy-on-guy sex romp.
In fact, there is more man-on-woman sex in “Brokeback Mountain,” including not-one-but-two hot female celebrities appearing topless. At an oppressive time in cinema when you’re lucky to see one naked celebrity’s breasts in a movie (Katie Holmes in “The Gift” and Amy Smart in “Road Trip” are two spectacular recent examples), “Brokeback Mountain” provides you with Michelle Williams and Anne Hathaway.
Michelle Williams AND Anne Hathaway topless?? Man, I am SO there…er, sorry, honey. I guess I just lost control of myself for a moment…. Of course, if it was Michelle Williams, Anne Hathaway, AND Julie Bowen topless…oh, man, I am gonna be in SO much trouble….
So, see the movie…or not. Just try not to buy into the hype. “Brokeback Mountain” is, after all, only a movie. Six months from now, no one will remember or care about it…and that’s probably as it should be. Movies tell stories. They entertain us and allow us to escape from reality for a couple of hours. One movie is certainly not going to make the Gay lifestyle or homosexuality in general more acceptable or trendy…and I think that’s probably a good thing.
Movies generally don’t set social policy or change attitudes on issues. After all, if we have to rely on Hollywood to make political and/or social statements…well, if you need an answer to that, why not just ask what Michael Medved would do?
