Our brave and diligent TSA identifies a threat to airline security

Lip gloss and that Starbucks latte remain dangerous to our national security, didn’t you know that?

Glad to learn the Mackinack Bridge is safe now too. Those guys had a thousand Trakfones…I can only guess they intended to have them all ring at once and the harmonic imbalance would send the thing into the straits.

I suppose next week they’ll decide we have to get rid of all BODILY fluids before entering an aircraft. What a line up that will be. Glad you could use the photo, Jack.

Dennis, I think they were going to order 1000 dominoes pizzas at once. Something about the combined weight of all those gut-bombs being rushed across the span weakening the trusses.

I’ve got 1000 car models in the garage. I better go turn myself in today. If all the other nerds found out about it, there could be a huge sinkhole formed in the midwest when they all tried to look at once.