November 5, 2006 6:48 AM

Ted Haggard: God's gift to late-night comedians everywhere

Evangelical Leader Resigning From Church

Ted Haggard’s Magic Meth Diet

Rev. Ted Has Hell Insurance!

Accuser recounts trysts with ‘Art’: He wanted to expose ‘hypocrisy,’ hopes it sways voters, he says

“We, the Overseer Board of New Life Church, have concluded our deliberations concerning the moral failings of Pastor Ted Haggard,” a statement from the church said. “Our investigation and Pastor Haggard’s public statements have proven without a doubt that he has committed sexually immoral conduct.”

copy290.gifI probably shouldn’t be having this much fun, but I am, and sure as Hell don’t feel like apologizing for it. Here’s Ted Haggard, a man who has held himself up as a holier-than-thou man of God…only to be exposed as a fudge-packing meth head. ANY residual sympathy I might have felt for Haggard went right out the window when I learned that the interview he gave from his car the other day was done WITH HIS CHILDREN IN THE BACK SEAT, after he twice turned down the opportunity to step outside so as not to have the conversation in front of them. Yes, the man is a creep. And don’t you imagine that his wife, Gayle was doing a slow burn in the passenger seat? So, Mrs. Haggard…how do you spell relief? How about D-I-V-O-R-C-E??

If Ted Haggard is a man of God, then I’m the Queen of England….

How craven, how hypocritical, how thoroughly f——d up must one be in order to carry on like this for three years while continuing to hold yourself up as a shining example of righteousness and godliness? While continuing to maintain close ties with BushCo and influence Administration policy?

Those of you who still call yourself Christians might want to send one up for Haggard…to ensure he has his own special place in Hell waiting for him.

Man, I hope all y’all are enjoying this even HALF as much as I am…. ;p)

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on November 5, 2006 6:48 AM.

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