Gov Rick Perry’s speech, for the hearing impaired
In the movie “They Live” only people with special sunglasses could see the aliens controlling the world with their subliminal messages like “Control” and “Obey” on billboards. I was lucky enough to have special hearing aids, so I could hear Governor Rick Perry’s real inauguration speech.
For those of us fortunate enough to have missed Governor Goodhair’s ignaugural speech, John Cobarruvias has been kind enough to provide a transcript…or I should say, translation…of his speech. I’ve ripped on Governor Goodhair a LOT over the years. Hell, he even got a DUMB@$$ AWARD a few days ago. He’s about to become the longest-serving governor in this state’s history, and yet most Texans can’t begin to tell you what he’s accomplished during his 206 years in office. Then again, the really important people in Texas- rich, White Republicans- can tell us exactly what Governor Goodhair has done for them. Well, they would tell us, but they’re too busy making money hand over fist to stop and talk.
If there’s any doubt about Governor Goodhair’s commitment to Texas’ good, God-fearing White Folk, all you had to do was to crash his Inaugural Ball. There you would discovered that the entertainment for the evening was one Theodore Nugent, a good friend of Governor Goodhair and a friend to Right-wing nutjobs everywhere (did they hand out lyrics sheets for “Cat Scratch Fever”??). Formerly known as the “Motor City Madman”, Nugent has taken up residence outside Waco, and with his “kill it and grill it” ideology, he seems right at home.
You can check out John’s post for the full translation, but I’d like to share my favorite part of the speech after the jump. I think you’ll agree that this truly is the Governor Goodhair we all know and love.
Texas corporations are better off when Republicans work together. Our potential is too vast to be spoiled by a politics leavened with bipartisanship.
Together, we must work to make our border more wide open so we can take advantage of the cheap Mexican labor and their succulent soft chicken tacos.
Together, we must continue to raise the already high rate of the uninsured and to increase the high cost of health insurance.
Together, we must commit to cutting funding for higher education as it prepares the workforce of the future to pay outrageous tuition and high interest rates on their loans.
Together, we must ensure that property tax relief is not only mythical, but senseless.
Together, we must pass budget reforms that protect the corporations from taxes while passing it to the middle class.
Mmm..succulent, soft chicken tacos….
Together, we must work together to represent the motto of The Great State of Texas: “THANK GOD FOR MISSISSIPPI!!”
