February 23, 2007 5:00 AM

Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us (Or, let me be the first to sound the death knell for the "Religion of Peace")

Michael Jackson ‘to convert to Islam’

Michael Jackson could soon convert to Islam, according to his brother Jermaine. The fallen pop star, who was acquitted of child abuse charges two years ago, has been reading Islamic books and developed an interest in the faith, his brother claims.

The cynic in me wants to opine about how The Gloved One has already had his 72 virgins…and they’ve all been young boys. Of course, that would be a horribly cruel (if not altogether inaccurate) observation, so I won’t go there…mostly because I just did.

It’s difficult to understand how this story could be considered to be even remotely newsworthy. I mean, who really cares what this sorry excuse for a human being does with his life? Well, probably the same person who’s been hanging on every morsel of news in the Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith sagas, eh?

Jeebus…get a life, willya??

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on February 23, 2007 5:00 AM.

Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us was the previous entry in this blog.

Don't get mad, get...horny? is the next entry in this blog.

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