May 23, 2007 6:52 AM

The voice of hatred, bigotry, and homophobia gets a hero's sendoff

Bill Maher’s Falwell Obituary

Thousands Mourn Falwell at Funeral

Did He Not Do Enough To Please You, Lord?

LYNCHBURG, Va. ‚Äö√Ñ√Æ The Rev. Jerry Falwell was remembered by thousands Tuesday as a champion of conservative Christian values who fearlessly galvanized the religious right into a powerful force in American politics.The funeral returned Falwell to his roots - the Thomas Road Baptist Church, where he started as a young preacher in 1956 with just 35 parishioners in an old, abandoned soda bottling plant. More than 10,000 people attended the funeral, many forced into overflow seating…. “He was a champion of the fundamental values that we hold dear,” fellow Virginia evangelist Pat Robertson said as he entered the sanctuary. “He stepped on some toes.”

The face of radical, hateful Christianity, the man the Washington Blade called “the face of homophobia”, was symbolically sent off to the Afterlife yesterday in Lynchburg, VA, the seat of the Falwell Empire. Given a hero’s sendoff, Falwell was remembered as a man of God who championed the values of Conservative Fundamentalism against the forces of secular humanism and those who would deny God his rightful place in ourr federal government. That these values are hatred, bigotry, ignorance, and intolerance seemed to bother no one present at the Fundamentalist gang bang funeral. No, these well-fed White folks swallowed every load Falwell offered. I suppose you can do that when you see yourself as one of God’s Chosen Ones.

You know that Falwell made an impact when, even though he was a homo-hating, gay-bashing bigot of the first order, Fred Phelps and his merry band of inbreds from the Westboro Baptist Church were in attendance at Falwell’s funeral. Yes, amazing as this may sound, Phelps’ troops were in Lynchburg to rail against Falwell for being a “friend of gays”. Yes, you read that correctly. Even better, a student at Falwell’s undergraduate indoctrination camp Liberty University was arrested with several bombs. Apparently, the poor, misguided zealot wanted to keep protesters from disrupting Falwell’s funeral. Uh…what???

Good Lord, I do believe my head’s about to explode….

Amazing what a few thousands zealots can convince themselves of, isn’t it? No, Jerry Falwell wasn’t a hateful, intolerant, homophobe whose mean-spirited God would just as soon kick your ass as lift you up. He was a holy, loving man of God (a poor man’s Fred Phelps??) who stood up for Evangelical Christian literalism (the belief that God’s Chosen Ones are well-fed, wealthy White folks) and was willing to impose his belief system on less-enlightened souls.

May Jerry Falwell roast in Hell…and if I ever find myself in Lynchburg, VA, again, you can bet that I’ll be taking a piss on his grave. And I don’t think I’ll be alone.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on May 23, 2007 6:52 AM.

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