Mike Huckabee: The anti-Limbaugh candidate
I was in the car listening to Rush Limbaugh responding to the Mike Huckabee campaign’s attack on him. What an unbelievably knuckle-headed move by Huckabee’s minions. Casting Limbaugh as part of the Beltway-Manhattan elite? Those who’ve been tuning in and listening closely know that Limbaugh has scrupulously avoided playing favorites with any of the GOP candidates. He’s been an equal-opportunity scrutinizer. What possible benefit could accrue from going after one of the conservative movement’s most popular figures? I believe this Rush-bashing incident may turn out to be Huckabee’s Howard Dean scream moment.
Normally, I’d care not a whit about Michelle Malkin’s opinion on ANY subject, but this circus of immaturity is really rather entertaining. Mike Huckabee, who as time goes by seems to be revealing himself to be an increasingly unbalanced, Jesus uber Alles Wingnut of the first order, has apparently, for reasons known only to himself, decided to take on Rush Limbaugh. I suppose this should probably be interpreted as a good thing. After all, if Republicans are busy eating their young, they’re not going to have a lot of energy left to take on whoever the Democratic standard-bearer will be. Plus, the entertainment value would be through the roof, no?
I can remember watching Huckabee on The Daily Show a few months back, and I was impressed by his seeming reasonableness. Here was a Republican who really seemed to “get it”, who understood that divisiveness may win elections, but it’s a damn poor way to run a country. Since then, however, as I’ve learned more about Huckabee, I’ve come to understand that he’s about nothing BUT divisiveness. In short, Mike Huckabee is all about Mike Huckabee. Besides being just another Dominionist Theocrat determined to govern based on Biblical principles, Huckabee has an ego the size of Arkansas and has no inclination towards anything resembling consensus-building. His willingness to take on Limbaugh, who could really do a lot of good things for him in terms of building support, shows how idsturbingly short-sighted and self-absorbed he really is.
In the immortal words of Chevy Chase, the democratic primary is still seriously boring, so why not take a closer look at the republican contest...
The Huckabee campaign suffered an early setback when he announced his opposition to torture. Apparently the republican establishment was counting on Huckabee to not only support waterboarding, but to put his experience as an ordained Southern Baptist Preacher to good use by actually performing interrogations himself, simultaneously extracting the maximum amount of information AND filling the enemy combatants hearts with love for everyone's Lord and Savior.
The early darling of the media had a strong showing in opinion polls, but that support eroded after the republican base learned a few more details about the cross-dressing blue city/blue state politician whose numerous ties to organized crime could inspire several more seasons of The Sopranos.
While a Giuliani vs. Clinton rematch in the general election would be interesting, in the primary Rudy has only managed to attract a grand total of 14 vocal supporters from 23 historically red southern/bible belt states. But secretly, the "hard core" republicans admire him for shacking up with gay guys and funneling public money to his mistresses, so he's definitely in it for the duration.
Support for Romney has been up and down. The republican base applauds his idea of "doubling Guantanamo" but his idea to equip every enemy combatant with Magic Mormon Underwear has failed to gain traction among fiscal conservatives. Meanwhile, the social/religious conservatives continue to ask Romney if he still beats his wives.
Romney downplays the amount of personal wealth he has expended on his campaign so far, but it's a well known fact that he purchased his Iowa Straw Poll victory solely with quarters he found under his couch cushions. It's widely rumored that Romney has forged a secret alliance with future running mate Michael Bloomberg to form a third party duo, cut to the chase, and bribe the Supreme Court now.
The veteran Arizona senator that succeeded Barry Goldwater in 1987 also ran a decent campaign for president in 2000. It's hard to say anything bad about the good Senator this close to his withdrawal, so lets just go ahead and say that he also ran a decent campaign in 2008.
Although Dr. Paul reluctantly and modestly admits to possessing a wide variety of super-human capabilities, he refuses to leap over tall buildings in a single bound without prior permission from the property owner. In his own words, "Well, the X-ray vision certainly helped me bring over 4000 new Texans into the world, but the Constitution does not allow a president to use such powers to spy on citizens. If elected, I will return all of my superpowers to the several states."