January 13, 2008 6:15 AM

A little early to be irrelevant, don't you think?


I wonder if Bush’s ass is kosher.

  • Jon Stewart

What if an American President went to the Middle East…AND NO ONE GAVE A RAT’S @$$?? Our Glorious and Benevolent Leader © is out of the country and…hey, quick; someone confiscate his passport!!

Yeah, we all remember how welcome things worked out in the Middle East for Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton, don’t we? Those negotiated peace agreements sure did make things better, didn’t they? Now you can see Jews and Arabs walking arm-in-arm through downtown Jerusalem, smiling and singing and…oh, wait…they’re really not, are they? Uh, no…no, they’re not…and they won’t be this time, either.

Hey, I suppose I can’t fault the guy for trying, but for the first seven years of his Reign of Error © Israel was merely a nice concept, but they don’t have any oil. Besides, the guy was kinda busy elsewhere in the MIddle East. Now that everyone recognizes him as a lame duck, it’s easy to recognize this taxpayer-funded sojourn for what it really is- an opportunity to burnish his legacy…such as it is.

Oh, and if he can use the trip as a platform to beat up on Iran, so much the better, eh?

For American presidents, the Middle East is where their legacies go to die.

Jimmy Carter got nothing out of brokering the Camp David agreement, and got destroyed by Iran. Ronald Reagan, after a massive re-election victory, got into scandal about Lebanon and Iran that ended with a special prosecutor and with half his Cabinet needing a pardon. The first George Bush got into a fight with Israel over settlements that hurt his re-election chances. Bill Clinton spent most of his last year in office working, almost to the last hour, on the big deal that was supposed to fix everything.

For a president primping in front of history, the Middle East is the middle of nowhere. For international statesmanship, better to have a photo opportunity on the Great Wall of China, or go to Paris, where at least the food is better.

At this late date, The Worst President EVER © is hardly seems a smart choice to try to bring peace to the Middle East. A intellectually incurious leader under the best of circumstances, and a lame duck to boot, it seems that the international community is viewing this trip rather cynically. And who can blame them? For the past seven years, Commander Codpiece &copy: has been channelling my father- “My way or the highway”. We’ve become the biggest bully on the block, and it’s probably going to take the next President the entire four years of their term to undo the damage that’s been done to our image overseas. (That poor image might help explain when a large portions of Britons are engaged in some serious tag-team puking.)

After seven years of ignoring the Middle East, NOW he’s getting busy and even proclaiming that there will be peace in the Middle East by the end of the year? The man isn’t exactly a student of the history of the modern Middle East, is he? Sixty years after the birth of the state of Israel, and peace has eluded the most serious and diligent of statesman. How this dilettante thinks he’s going to succeed where others have failed is something I can’t begin to fathom. Stoopid…and built to stay that way.

1.20.09 seems such a long, LONG ways off, doesn’t?

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on January 13, 2008 6:15 AM.

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