Man, is there a more pointless, time-wasting example of mental masturbation than the NFL Draft? I mean, doesn't it seem as if ESPN has been hyping the draft since...well, since the end of the Super Bowl in February? The network began it's wall-to-wall coverage some three hours before the festivities in New York even began (and this doesn't even take into account the weeks of pointless blather and speculation in the run-up to Draft Day). I ran across it while at the gym on Saturday morning, and I was struck by how seriously people seemed to be taking it- not only the talking heads, but the people around me. My God, y'all; we're talking about a bunch of college kids who are about to become obscenely wealthy, even though none of them will play an official down until September. Yet ESPN has been hyping the NFL Draft, and the attendant silliness, for months now...and you could have been forgiven for waking up and thinking that Saturday was Christmas Day.
Man, don't ya'll have kids to play with??
Perhaps the silliest aspect of Draft Day is listening to Mel Kiper and Todd McShay, two jock-sniffing draftniks who wouldn't know which end of a protective cup is up if you handed them a flashlight and an instruction manual. Kiper in particular probably hasn't run a 40-yard dash since his last sojourn between ESPN's set and the buffet line. I've always found it amusing to listen to Kiper and McShay pontificating about the NFL Draft, especially since neither of them could likely throw a block to save their lives.
If you're like me, and you actually have something resembling a life, here's a recap of Saturday's NFL Draft: 32 teams drafted a total of 252 players, some of whom will make it and some who won't. No one answers the most important question (Ryan Leaf or Peyton Manning?) on Draft Day, but for those of you who just can't wait until training camps open in July...well, I really do feel sorry for you. While you're debating your team's picks, your children are growing up and your life is slipping by. Too bad you can't devote that same time and energy to something that actually matters....
