Súrsaðir Hrútspungar - The cured scrota of rams, including testicles. Ram's testicles, pickled in whey, put in gelatin, pressed either into a cake with garlic, as a jam, or as a kind of pâté that tastes sour and spongy, with a texture reminiscent of pressed cod roe. Not bad if you don't think about it too much, especially in pâté form'.
OK, so every now and then I have these completely random thoughts that seemingly come out of nowhere. No one who knows me will be particularly surprised by this, nor by the seemingly completely random impulsiveness with which these thoughts emerge. As these things go, however, this one's a classic...even by my standards.
So, my 50th birthday is coming. Yes, it's still 20+ months off, but it's never too early to obsess over a number, right? So, this sets me to thinking. I should do something special, right? After all, the big five-oh is a big milestone- if you're interest that sort of numerological significance.
What to do? What to do?
And then it hits me....
I've always had a fascination for strange, out of the way places. I've been to Albania, for example...but I've gotta tell you that, unless you're into Communist architecture and wide, disturbingly broad boulevards designed as a monument to Enver Hoxha's immense ego, the country just doesn't present well as a potential vacation destination. Perhaps if Albania had a golf course or a Club Med, but abject Third World poverty and corruption just doesn't do it for me. Been there, done that, seen the rats....
After tossing some ideas around, it came to me: Iceland. I mean, how could you NOT want to go to a country whose delicacies include things like cured ram scrota, burned sheep's head, sheep's fat, rotted stingray, and rotten shark? Oh, yeah...and they have TWO kinds of haggis. Sign me up, eh?? Besides, Iceland offers two of the things I promised myself for my next international adventure- no snipers and no minefields. What more could a man ask for??
OK, and I suppose Bob would rather see me get a kitten, but I really do want to do something fun and unusual...and something no one else could possibly conjure up without the benefit of several Jagr bombs. The good thing is that I have 20+ months to put this whole thing together. Who knows, perhaps someone female, attractive, and fun will accompany me on my journey. A lot could happen in 20 months, I suppose, but this trip really is for my own edification. There are other ideas, of course (getting a tattoo, going skydiving, tap-dancing through a minefield, getting naked and horizontal with Maggie Gyllenhaal, jello-wrestling with the Swedish Bikini Team)- some of which may actually happen- but I need a goal. So why not Iceland? Now I just need to figure out how to make it happen...and if I should begin soliciting donations from my vast and far-flung readership?
Come on, admit it...you can't wait for me to blog from Reykjavik, right? Wouldn't you be willing to donate to the cause to make it happen? I know there are a few of you out there who'd probably like to send me to the moon on a one-way ticket. That's not likely to happen, so Iceland may just be the next best thing.
Hmm...I wonder what sort of wine goes well with cured ram scrota??
As it happens, Iceland is next on my list of places to visit before I'm 50, too.
If you put $20 towards my trip, I'll put $20 toward yours. :)
Woohoo!! Only about $4980 left to go!!
My first thought was to suggest that you bring the kitten(s) with you. But given the info in your post I'd be concerned that they might end up on a menu.
In the five years since my emancipation from marriage I've celebrated my freedom in a number of necessarily economical ways, among them are a fairly large earing and a colorful tattoo bearing the names of not just one, but two lovely young ladies (who happen to be my daughters.)
I've also started counting my years in hexadecimal, so like Jack, I'm only 30 (in hex.) You'll always be as young as you feel, dude.
My unsolicited advice is to make the trip if you can and want to. It really sounds like a blast. Just be realistic about your expectations of doing so. I got pierced and tattooed not to feel young, but because I wanted to.
I may joke about being x'30' but I'm good with feeling 48 too.
Thanks, Bob. I've been feeling like I need to start setting some goals for myself. Training to walk the Portland Marathon was a good start (Be kind to your knees; you'll miss them when they're gone), and doing something off the wall like planning a trip to Iceland seemed like fun. I also want to buy a house, but I haven't quite puzzled that one through.
Getting a tattoo has also entered into my thinking, but I'm not quite sure I'd ever find the cojones to go through with it.
Now that it's just me, why the Hell not?
BTW, if you're as young as you feel...well, that would make me about 206 at the moment. Ugh.... ;-)
LOL... I know that feeling, but hey! It could be worse...
Mathematically speaking, in dog years I'm 336. But the worst part is that I still can't lick my balls.
Hang in there dude. I have a feeling that you'll be fine.
You have to be kidding me! What kind of freeloading bastard asks his friends for such a trip. Wow, get off your ass and get a real job you jack ass.
And what sort of incivil maroon leaves such a hateful comment? It's my sandbox, and I can do or ask for what I please. You are free to read or not. In this case, feel free to take your mean-spirited ignorance elsewhere.
I'm not seriously expecting anyone to give me money; that wasn't the point of this post. Clearly, though, you're too (&^%$#@ stupid to get it.
Dude, your knuckles must be killing you from dragging them for so long....
BTW...your rock called. It wants you to crawl back under it. ;-)
I have to admit that I am a little confused....When I got the e-mail stating that you were doing "fundraising" for your own trip to Iceland, I have to admit that I thought you were asking for donations towards your trip to Iceland. Now, after seeing the response to Mr. U Ranus, I understand that I had this all wrong.
So before I join Mr U.Ranus in dragging my knuckles, what was the point of this post exactly?
"Come on, admit it...you can't wait for me to blog from Reykjavik, right? Wouldn't you be willing to donate to the cause to make it happen?"
Of course, I don't read your blog, but I still got an e-mail with the headline "Another cheap attempt to separate you from your money", so I actually thought you were asking for money. Well, as you know, I am just an ignorant, hard working republican, no wonder I got this all wrong.....
Hey, if you want to send me money, I will gladly accept the same. Perhaps it might not have come across quite in the manner I'd hoped for, but my post was more about me setting a goal than about fundraising. A trip to Iceland is not an inexpensive proposition, so I'm open to raising money from any and all (legal) sources. If you were offended by this, please accept my apologies. I was just trying to have some fun. This is, after all, my sandbox.
Nah, I am not easily offended, but I do find it curious that a 48-year old man, college educated and gainfully employed for 25 years, asks for financial assistance to take a trip, a trip for pure pleasure.
As you said; "Man, the things I am willing to do."
Best of luck with your "fundraising", I hope your lojal readers feel the urge to support you, I understand that you have quite the following. In a sense, I guess this is really the "proof in the pudding" as to how much they truly appreciate your rants, and how deep their support goes.
If this goes well, I know you always wanted to buy a house.........