Catholic Leader Says Newt's "Sins No Longer Exist": If Newt Gingrich is to be held up as the perfection of humanity...well, we really are (&^%$#, aren't we??
Some visit Pol Pot's grave looking for luck: Sure, he was one of the most brutal and notorious mass murderers of the 20th century (of which, sadly, there has been no lack), but there's money to be made, damn it....
Natasha Richardson's 911 Transcripts: Her Struggle To Survive: Can't we just let her family mourn her loss in peace...without turning it into some some sort of tawdry spectacle for our own entertainment and amusement?
Smokers Face A Hit As Tobacco Taxes Spike: Sorry...I know that my attitude on this issue might not be universally appreciated, but I think this is absolutely the right tactic in the war on tobacco.
Alleged Killer Of ABC Newsman Demands Cash For Interview: Dude, you'll be lucky not to get the death penalty. When, exactly, do you think you'll be getting out of prison and be able to spend your windfall?
ShamWow Pitchman Arrested For Battering Hooker: He also pitches the SlapChop, which seems oddly appropriate under these circumstances....
Weight loss enhances obese men's sexual well-being: Hmm...fat guys don't get nookie? Uh, wait...another call from Captain Obvious on line two??
6 Twitter Games To Make Tweeting Fun: Yeah, 'cuz Lord knows Twitter is really just a massive time-suck designed to occupy those with WAY too much time on their hands.... ;-)
Friend Of Biden's Daughter Shopping Tape Of Her Allegedly Doing Cocaine: Yeah, but it was the clip of her going down on Eric Cantor in the House gym that's going to be the real scandal.
British Police Identify 200 Children As Potential Terrorists: So...I wonder what's in little Johnny's book bag today??
IOC with another profile in courage: The next Olympic torch relay will be two laps around the track at a YMCA.
Steele: "I'm Done" Reaching Out To Obama: Uh...when, exactly, did this allegedly magnanimous attempt at collaboration occur? And if your idea of "reaching out" is anything like your idea of insightful, inspired leadership, Obama would be well advised to tell you to get lost.