May 26, 2009 6:22 AM

Willya just secede already and be done with it?

Critical thinking is gobbledy-gook. Public education is tyrannical and unconstitutional. Darwin was wrong and somebody's gotta stand up to those menacing scientific experts! If you agree or at least feel comfortable with the above statements that have come from various Texas State Board of Education members in the past year, then fear not. The Texas Legislature apparently has your back, and that of the far-right voting bloc of the SBOE as well. For the rest of us foolish enough to value critical thinking skills, public education, Darwin's limitless contributions to science, and the opinions of educators, scientists and other people who have spent their lives accumulating invaluable expertise that can only make our schools better, be afraid. Be very afraid.... Already, far-right board members are assembling a panel of so-called experts, some of whom have no academic qualifications but plenty of extremist religious views, such as the idea held by one that Katrina was God's revenge against gays.

I know I make fun of Texas a lot...and I'm not about to apologize for it. There are two very good reasons why I don't feel any need to apologize. One, I lived in Texas for ten years (I escaped and moved back to Oregon two years ago), and as a refugee I know of which I speak. Two, Texas does an unparalleled job of self-parody in it's own right. There's no way to fix stupid, and after ten years in the Lone Star State, I discovered a gold mine of stupid. It's not so much that your average Texan's grip on reality is looser than yours or mine, but the arrogance and self-superiority that seem to so often walk hand-in-hand with carrying a Texas driver's license is as stunning as it is highly entertaining.

If I offend any of my Texas readers, well, you have my apologies for that, but you and I both know it wouldn't hurt if it wasn't true....

Exhibit A in this argument has to be the State Board of Edumication, which has been populated with good Right-wing Christian soldiers who seem to see it as their sworn duty to indoctrinate Texas children into the service of Jesus Christ. Silly me; I'd always thought that the job of an educator was to prepare children to succeed in their chosen avocation once they reach adult. That's why it's called "education", no? Well, in fact, no...this is Texas we're talking about, remember? Far too many in positions of power, including SBOE, seem to think that if it's not written between the cover of their King James Version, it just ain't worth knowing...much less teaching.

Science? Nah, they're just going to want to teach evolution...and where is that in the Bible?

Tolerance? Look, how are our children going to learn how to hate Gays and Libruls if they're learnin' all this love and tolerance and $#!&??

History? Hey now...God said it; I believe it. What more does little Johnny need to know?

Social Contract? What, you wanna teach my children SOCIALISM?? Show me where that is in the Bible...and then we'll talk, 'kay??

Yeah, I know; it's impossible to reason with the unreasonable. It's been said (by me one more than one occasion) that Fundamentalism is the sound of a mind slamming shut. This could well be the definition of the Texas SBOE, who seem to be bent on turning Texas' public schools into Right-wing Christian re-education camps.

WHAT SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE?? And how 'bout y'all just secede now while you're whining about the injustice of the heavy hand of the federal government? And take Oklahoma with you, willya?? 'KTHNXBYE!!!

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on May 26, 2009 6:22 AM.

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