....Angela Merkel's cleavage is becoming the central attraction of the German election campaign. Man, this is almost enough to make me swear off sex altogether....
....Your health insurance sucks. No, really. I wouldn't kid about something like this. It really, really, REALLY sucks.
....Greetings from Hell...it looks a lot like a flight on Continental Airlines.
....WHAT?? THE GOVERNMENT IS GONNA EUTHANIZE GRANDMA??
....Hey, guess what, y'all?? The "Death Panel" already exists...and it looks a lot like your health insurance carrier.
....Anyone competition which involves the words "butt crack" is probably one you're going to want to avoid...right??
....Yeah, I ran him over. Yeah, I was drunk...but he was Cuban and I'm a professional football player. That's got to be worth something, right? It's not like he could run a 40 in under five seconds or anything....
....You're a journalist...and you've been kidnapped. Sure, you're going to want to panic at first. Once you've had some time to reflect on your fate, you'll realize what an awesome career opportunity you've just been handed.
....You know that New Jersey sucks when it's legislators are reduced to this sort of mindless mental masturbation. Joey Soprano would pop a cap in him and call it a day, right?
....Things to do in Buffalo when you're 20 cents short of cab fare.