Forget the Double Down or the McGangBang, the ultimate fast food burger has been found — the Frankenburger. And when I say “ultimate,” I literally mean this could be the final thing you ever eat. According to the Village Voice’s detailed description of the Frankenburger, the main ingredients are a Burger King Whopper, a McDonald’s Big Mac and a double quarter-pounder with cheese from Wendy’s, who also supply the finishing touch: a handful of french fries…. The Frankenburger bun and veggies come from the Whopper, the main condiment is the Big Mac Special Sauce, and the meat, cheese and fries are compliments of the Wendy’s double
For those of you wishing that you could commit suicide…if only you had the balls…I present the Frankenburger. If it looks like the gastronomic equivalent of “death by cop“…you might just be closer to the truth than you realize.
I don’t eat beef, so I have a built-in excuse for why I can’t/won’t subject myself to the Frankenburger for the sake of science, but Sarah DiGregorio from The Village Voice did…and I can’t honestly say that I’m feeling jealous. Maybe it’s just me, but this seems like a myocardial infarcation looking for a place to unleash itself.
Beware the Frankenburger! It’s the frightening product of a careful — and often disgusting — experiment to make the tastiest fast-food hamburger possible. If you took the best elements from a Big Mac, a Whopper, and Wendy’s Half-Pound Double with cheese, what would you get? You’d get the Frankenburger, my friends. And when we say “best,” well, everything’s relative.
First of all, we’re talking about fast-food hamburgers, which, if not already disgusting and unhealthy enough, have been taken to new heights (or depths?) to create the Frankenburger. As appealing as this might seem, I doubt that the New York Times food critic will be holding forth on this gastronomic depth charge any time soon.
The good news is that the Frankenburger will probably be responsible for helping a few cardiologists put their kids through college….
