Texas Priest Charged With Hiring Hitman To Kill Teen Who Accused Him Of Sexual Abuse. Hmm…it’s not quite what comes to mind for most of us when we think about “doing the Lord’s work”, but OK…. Let us prey.
Gentlemen Prefer Zombies…. Caribou Barbie’s career as a political propaganda reality show star might be (mercifully) shorter than she might have been hoping for.
Congressman’s Chief Of Staff Arrested For Soliciting Sex From Minor. Man, you can get ANYTHING on Craigslist, can’t you??
Woman pleads guilty in Domino’s gross-out case. And this is why I never order pizza from Domino’s.
Defense Department Tries To Uncover Secret Of Flying Snakes. Once they’ve solved that mystery, they’re going to tackle the challenge of canned unicorn meat.
Mom slaps referee during daughter’s soccer game in Forsyth County. Sometimes I think parents should be sedated before they’re allowed to watch their children competing in athletic events. This woman should probably have been euthanized.
Complaint about prostitutes lands man in jail. If you’re expecting a prostitute to provide services to you at below-market rates, you can’t expect to be surprised when said prostitute rips you off.
Clearing the path to a safer land. Yeah, I know I’ve been out of work for awhile…but clearing land mines in Cambodia still doesn’t sound very appealing.
Armed lawmaker stopped by police in Highland Park. You’re a GOP State Representative with a loaded gun, extra ammo and maps under your seat. You park your truck in a Planned Parenthood parking lot. What do you do? Hmm…ask for directions to the Mall of America??
Flier hauled off plane over too many bathroom breaks. Those aboard U.S. Airways flight to Denver said passenger was acting ‘weird’. The unfortunate man was booked on charges of “peeing frequently while swarthy”, which carries a potential sentence of five years solitary confinement in a pay toilet with no quarters.
WA man proposes, drops ring in Puget Sound. Well, hopefully they’ll have a funny story to tell down the road.
Pope Approves Of Condoms For All. Unless you’re using a condom for birth control purposes, in which case it’s still a mortal sin.
