Go ahead, blame the kicker. Chase him down while the play is still live and let everyone at home know whose fault this loss is. It’s yours, Matt Dodge! It’s all your fault!…. It is a time-honored tradition in football to blame the kicker for a loss. It’s easy, after all. Damn kicker blew the game. But that’s not how it works. Football is complex. Every player on every single play affects the outcome, but no one wants to hear this. They want someone to burn in effigy, and who better than the weenie who wears a weird number and a weird facemask and hangs out by himself on the sideline kicking special footballs into a net over and over while real men do men’s work out on the field. Just kick the ball out of bounds! If only it were that simple.
If you’re a Giants or an Eagles fan, you know all too well what happened last Sunday. New York surrendered what seemed a comfortable fourth-quarter lead by giving up (more like throwing up) 28 points at the end of the game to lose to Philadelphia. (Uh…Mr. Pisarcik? Herm Edwards on line two for you…something about a fumble??)
Philadelphia won the game on a punt return for a touchdown by DeSean Jackson…on the final play of the game. If you’re a football fan, you’re wondering why Giants punter Todd Dodge didn’t just kick the ball out of bounds. Punt out of bounds, no return, Giants win. Good night, game over, drive home safely. Or not.
Actually, Dodge was trying to kick the ball out of bounds, though, as a former NFL player explains, these things don’t always work as planned. Of course, when a directional kick goes wrong, what’s a coach supposed to do? Of course…blame the punter. SON, WE PAY YOU TO DO ONE THING AND ONE THING ONLY…AND YOU (&^%$# IT UP!!
Yeah, if you’re going to be an NFL punter or placekicker, you’d better have a thick skin, an overdeveloped appreciation for irony, and be secure in the knowledge that fate can be a fickle wench. Once upon a time, I was, among other things, both a punter and a placekicker…and I’m here to tell you that more often than not the universe is aligned against you. Get used to it…and get used to being held responsible for things that all too often are completely out of your control.
Game on, eh??
