Al Qaeda Nearly Killed Us All With Sinister Salad Bar Plot. First, they came for our salad bars…but I didn’t care, because I don’t eat vegetables.
Ukrainian Journalist Interviews Lawmakers While Wearing a Bunny Suit. It was either that or a birthday suit….
BofA Accused Of Breaking Into Woman’s Home, Taking Husband’s Ashes. That was bad enough, but it was selling the ashes on eBay that really upset the poor woman.
Zsa Zsa Gabor’s Husband Glues His Eye Shut. Eye brows…glue…. Hey, it’s a mistake anyone could make, right?
Official: North Korea targets South Korea in propaganda drive. Neener neener…. Nuh uh…are too…. I know I am, but what are you??
Mike Huckabee Defends Michelle Obama Against Sarah Palin. This just in: Hell freezes over…film @ 11!!
Scientists Breed Singing Mouse. If the mouse busts out into an a cappella version of “Sweet Caroline”, I’m outta here….
Marijuana Mutiny: Montana Judge Can’t Find Unbiased Jury For Pot Case. The judge knew he was in trouble when potential jurors showed up glassy-eyed with brownies and bags of Doritos.
Fuel Vs Food: Ethanol Helps Boost The Price Of Meat. No good dead goes unpunished…or why driving your Prius means you’ll be paying more for your steak.
Dr. Drew Apologizes To Brad & Angelina For Predicting Their Demise. Yeah, right…remember, you’re a doctor, not a carpenter….
9 Ways The World Could End In 2012. Like we need anything else to obsess over.
Cornell Senior Smuggled Heroin, Posed in Bikini, Edited Cornell Daily Sun. So she gets points for multi-tasking??
