Some college students are hungry to learn. Others are just hungry. A crew of big eaters at the University of Maryland have put their stomachs on the line, founding what could be the nation’s first collegiate competitive eating club…. “The University of Maryland motto is ‘Fear the Turtle,’” said Keith Solomon, club founder and president of the competitive eating club team at the University of Maryland. “Our motto is ‘Feed the Turtle.’”
OK, so I understand that one person’s idle hobby is another’s competitive sport. And I recognize that college is supposed to be dedicated to learning, experimentation, and expanding horizons. That being said, I have difficulty understanding how one of The Seven Deadly Sins- gluttony- can now be considered a competitive sport. I mean, what’s next- a school-sponsored adultery team? Or perhaps competitive avarice is an idea whose time has come?? Couldn’t these kids just settle for being extras on an episode of Man vs. Food?? Do Joey Chestnut or Takeru Kobayashi (or Adam Richman, for that matter) really deserve to be regarded as role models who set the standard for those who dream of the gastronomic equivalent of stuffing eight pounds into a five-pound sack??
Though I try to (generally delude myself into thinking that I can) maintain an open mind, I just can’t wrap my head around the idea that converting gluttony from a mortal sin into a competitive sport is a good thing. Like most of us, I grew up with my parents using the “but you know there are children starving in Ethiopia” argument when I refused to eat foods (like liver) I despised. It’s a patently silly argument, of course, but part of that mindset has stuck with me over the years. In a world in which there are those living with what we now call “food insecurity” (North Korea, anyone??), is it really possible to justify gluttony as sport? And should our public institutions of higher learning really be sanctioning this sort of senseless excess??
I don’t know that I have the answers to the questions I’ve posed, but pondering this has, if nothing else, made me hungry. I wonder if I still have that emergency pizza in my freezer?… ;-)
