I will be civil in my public discourse and behavior.
I will be respectful of others whether or not I agree with them.
I will stand against incivility when I see it.
I can think of no sadder commentary on the current state of our culture than when the founder of a group dedicated to promoting civility gives up the fight because of…wait for it…incivility. Yes, Mark DeMoss, a Conservative Evangelical Christian committed to working to create a more civil tone into our public discourse, has thrown in the towel on The Civility Project. Perhaps it was the truly vitriolic, mean-spirited reaction he received from so many (mostly Right-wing) Americans who see politics as a blood sport and those they disagree with worthy only of destruction. Perhaps it was the fact that DeMoss sent out letters out to 585 Governors and members of Congress asking them to sign a simple pledge committing them to living and promoting civility…and only three members of Congress (and no Governors) bothered to sign the pledge. Perhaps it was that, when you get right down to it, we don’t want to be civil.
I’m not expecting that we’ll all be sitting around the campfire anytime soon, singing Kumbayah and eating S’mores. We have differences. We’ll always have differences. Still, is it too much to ask that we appreciate those differences and try to respect them? Sadly, the answer appears to be “yes”.
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It appears that it’s far easier to be incivil than to treat fellow humans as if they matter and that their opinions hold some inherent value. In the interest of fairness and full disclosure, I would be remiss not to own up to my own part in contributing to our collective incivility. I’ve made a commitment to myself that I’m going to do what I can to ratchet down my rhetoric and my anger. No, I’m not suddenly going to begin channeling Stuart Smalley, nor will anyone likely ever confuse me for Pollyanna, but I’m tired of contributing to the collective angst. I’ve been doing that for close to ten years now through this forum…and I haven’t really noticed much of a change. That being the case, it’s become clear to me that, while I may not be able to effect change on a macro level, I can and intend to do so on a micro level- me. Change starts with me, because that’s all I really have any influence or control over.
Little known fact: pounding one’s head against a wall repeatedly only leaves one with a headache and a bruised and bloodied forehead.
In all seriousness, though, I do think that the demise of The Civility Project is a larger tragedy that we might think. If only 3 of 585 Governors or Congressman can be bothered to pledge to model and promote civility, then what hope do the rest of us have?
Only one side has made the rhetoric of armed revolt against an oppressive tyranny the guiding spirit of its grassroots movement and its midterm campaign. Only one side routinely invokes the Second Amendment as a form of swagger and intimidation, not-so-coyly conflating rights with threats. Only one side’s activists bring guns to democratic political gatherings. Only one side has a popular national TV host who uses his platform to indoctrinate viewers in the conviction that the President is an alien, totalitarian menace to the country. Only one side fills the AM waves with rage and incendiary falsehoods. Only one side has an iconic leader, with a devoted grassroots following, who can’t stop using violent imagery and dividing her countrymen into us and them, real and fake. Any sentient American knows which side that is.
Civility is something that ALL of us are responsible for, regardless of ideological orientation. Incivility is something that all of us contribute to, though let’s be real, shall we? There’s little doubt about where the bulk of the problems reside. When so many on the Right are so heavily invested in rage, lies, and vitriol, what hope do we really have of finding common ground, of having a reasoned, rational discussion? When Right-wing zealots blithely toss about terms like “Socialism”, “Death Panels”, “Second Amendment Remedies”, there’s simply no middle ground available. Those willing to engage in that sort of language are wedded to a rhetorical slash-and-burn strategy designed to show no mercy and take no prisoners. How do people with good intentions find middle ground with people so enraged, so welded to their anger and vitriol? The simple answer is, of course, that it’s just simply not possible.
I’m not going to pretend that those of us on the Left aren’t capable of excessively emotional and angry rhetoric. I will still maintain that those on the Right bear a far greater responsibility for the vitriolic state of our public discourse, but those of us on the Left (myself included) have certainly made a substantial contribution. This being said, we on the Left can simply choose to no longer participate in the madness. We may not be able to control or influence the level of rage emanating from the Right, but we can decide not to react and not to participate in what has become less a debate than a shouting contest.
This is where I try to renew my hope in the Silent Majority, those who don’t have a dog in this fight…or at least not one trained to kill. I understand that given the state of our economy, the level of anger, desperation, and frustration is extremely high. Still, I have to believe that there are still large numbers of Americans willing to talk to one another. We might not agree with each other, but I have to believe that most of us still understand that we’re better together than we are apart. I just can’t accept that the screaming ninnies that populated the town hall meeting of the summer of 2009 represent the majority of Americans. We’re better than this, and while it’s sad the The Civility Project failed in its attempt to prove this, it doesn’t change what I believe to be the reality in this country.
We Americans have always been a contentious and disputatious lot, but until recently we’ve somehow managed to recognize and, for the most part, respect our differences. Now we have a public discourse in which some are quite literally willing to kill those they disagree with, because they’re threatened by those who dare to think differently.
We’re better than this…aren’t we??
