May 30, 2011 4:50 AM

Today's signs that the Apocalypse may be upon us

“Wham, Bam, Thank You Ma’am!”: Why You Should Have More Quickies. OK…you had me at “more quickies”….

Pawlenty pardoned serial child molester so wife could open up day care center. Wow…so Republicans really ARE all about creating jobs??

15 Fictional Characters We Want To Sleep With. Personally, I’d go with any Natalie Portman or Rachel McAdams character.

Baptist Group: Oklahoma’s Sharia Ban Is Unconstitutional. Yep…looks like Captain Obvious in in the house.

Bolivia Set to Pass Historic ‘Law of Mother Earth’ Which Will Grant Nature Equal Rights to Humans. Mother Earth was unavailable for comment.

Ridiculous Tips for a Miserable Sex Life: May 2011. Like you really need any help making poor decisions, right??

As Congress And Netanyahu Line Up Against 1967 Borders, Most Israelis And Palestinians Support Them. Which only proves that, as per usual, the people are way out in front of the politicians.

Newt: Look at my record. But don’t look at my record. “Newt Gingrich” is the literal translation for the Latin phrase “Your Presidential campaign is stillborn.”

Tips for powerful men on how not to end up like Dominique Strauss-Kahn. Hmm…you could always try not schtupping women who aren’t your wife. Just a suggestion….

$50 light bulbs and the cost of gas, here and in Afghanistan: Fact Check. If a Republican repeats something often it enough and with enough conviction it will eventually become the truth.

Wisconsin GAB rejects GOP challenges, first three recall elections set for July 12. Paybacks can be a real…well, you get the idea…. ;-)

Focus On The Family’s President Concedes Loss On Same-Sex Marriage, But Still Compares It To Polygamy. Nothing quite like going down swinging, eh? Stay classy, y’all….

Tennessee Anti-Gay Bill Would Roll Back Civil Rights Protections. Because you can only have second-class citizens when you turn a minority class of people into second-class citizens. Next: pink triangles!

House Republicans still playing games with debt ceiling default threat. Because when you care more about scoring political points than doing what’s best for the country, this is what you get.

Zach Galifianakis says he wouldn’t want to do a sex scene with January Jones. Which just makes him a minority of one.

GOP Congressman Says Don’t Raise The Debt Ceiling Unless We Abolish Departments Of Energy And Education. Remember the 2010 campaign, when Republicans were ALL about jobs and the economy? That was then, when they actually needed votes…which is the only time they really care about Americans.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on May 30, 2011 4:50 AM.

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