(Also published at The Agonist)
I was sorry that no one asked Perry more of the really critical questions. For instance, is it true that he saved his daughter’s puppy from being eaten by a coyote? This allegedly happened when Perry went jogging “packing a Ruger .380 with laser sights and loaded with hollow-point bullets.” Because, as he says, he is “that kind of guy.” His puppy-rescue is a stirring picture, especially considering that Perry’s chief competitor is the man who drove to Canada with the family dog Seamus strapped to the roof of the car.
More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
I’ve always had an interest in politics (that being the primary raison d’etre for this blog during the past 10 years), but even I have my limits. F’rinstance, I have a very low threshold for demagoguery and pontificating…which brings me to the 2012 Presidential campaign. Honestly, I keep hoping that all but one of the current field of GOP contenders will be swallowed whole when the Earth miraculously cleaves open beneath them. I don’t really care which one, mind you; I just want the brain-dead silliness to come to a swift and merciful conclusion. Alas, I fear this is not to be the case, and I do believe my pointy li’l haid done be ‘bout to ‘splode….
You might think I’m going to begin by declaiming as to how morally bankrupt, inept, uber-Jesus-y, and lacking in compassion the GOP field is. That would be WAY too easy. They are, of course; not that there’s anything new or unusual in that revelation. No, that’s (very) old (and tired) news…and besides, I want to begin by pointing out that the choice on the Democratic side of the ballot ain’t exactly all shiny and wonderful, either. Regardless of whether his jobs speech was the “old 2007 Obama” becoming the “new 2011 Obama,” those of us who call ourselves “Progressives” have much to be disappointed about. Looking forward to November 2012, then, isn’t exactly something that fills my heart with gladness. To say that Obama has displayed an appalling lack of cojones would only be an insult to cojones. Since I only have finite amount of (cheap yet literate) insults in me, I’m going to try and keep my powder…at least for the moment.
Given where we’ve been, where we are, and the mediocrities currently in the hopper, seldom have our options been more bleak.
I made a concerted effort not to watch last week’s GOP dog and pony show debate…because, really, is there anything less enlightening and more upsetting than watching Conservatives furiously trying to out-demagogue one another? Part of the reason I didn’t watch the debate is that you could queue pretty much any of the ones that have occurred thus far and those yet to come and they’d sound roughly the same. Oh, sure, the words will change, and the number of empty suits might dwindle, but the recurring themes, the appeals to St. Ronald of Reagan, and the claims to be Rightier and Mightier will be as identical, hollow, vapid, and as airy and meaningless as anything that’s come before. Facts will be mangled, statistics misremembered and misquoted, and broad unprovable pronouncements will be tossed about as if they were Moses tossing them off the Mount to the famished masses. Honestly, the GOP could have re-run the recent debate in Iowa instead of spending the money to get everyone together at the Reagan Library. Then they could have used the money they would have saved to take everyone to a lesbian-themed bondage club in West Hollywood (And you were wondering what Michael Steele’s legacy was going to be?).
Though you might not think this, I’m really trying not to be cynical. I really am. I know that this is an important election, and ideas matter. It’s just that the current collection of lightweights (Et tu, Herman Cain?), dimbulbs (Howdy, Rick Perry!!), inflexible zealots (Yay, Rick Santorum!!), and moral reprobates (Come on down, Newt Gingrich!!) makes my head hurt. And don’t even get me started on Michele Bachmann, who, I’m ashamed to admit, represents the Congressional district I went to high school in (I had no idea I grew up surrounded by so many intolerant, hyperreligious, uber-Jesus-y zealots). I’m not certain Bachmann has ever met a fact she couldn’t bend to her will and benefit.
As a group, the GOP’s collection of mediocrities live in a hermetically-sealed and disturbingly fact-free environment. I’m not going to put forward the idea that Democrats have a monopoly on facts, because, trust me, I’m well aware that the mangulation of facts is something that neither knows nor respects party lines. Still, Republicans, especially those of the Social Conservative variety have what can only charitably be described as a gift for beating facts and truth into something virtually unrecognizable. The GOP 2012 field has certainly demonstrated their collective facility for strangulating the truth and creating their own facts on an as-needed basis.
And you wonder why I fear for the future of this country that I love? If this is the best America has to offer…then God (or somebody) help us all.
It might be a bit early to make this call, but from where I sit, it looks as if America’s choice in 14 months will be between a spineless weenie whose idea of negotiating is to immediately curl up into the fetal position and a Right-wing demagogue whose heart’s desire is to drag America kicking and screaming back to the Good Ol’ Days…the 19th century.
Let us hope that we’ll choose wisely….
