February 4, 2012 5:32 AM

Some random and probably pretty pointless observations about the human condition

Overheard yesterday while waiting in line for my order at a sandwich shop in Longview, WA: “DO YOU HIRE FELONS?”

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Erin and I ordered a pizza from Domino’s the other night. Did you know that you can monitor the progress of your pizza online? Domino’s “Pizza Tracker” allows you to track your pizza from the time your order is entered to preparation to baking to quality control to delivery. Man, when I was in college we just called the closest Domino’s, told them what we wanted, then went on about our business (which probably involved getting stoned) and assumed we’d have a pizza in our hands within 30 minutes or so. Even with all the wonderful technology and the online feedback options, the pizza was still astonishingly, disappointingly bland. What’s the point of all the bells and whistles if the pizza still sucks??

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Awhile back, I paid $100 for two spots on the waiting list for Portland Timbers season tickets, only to discover that 94% of 2011 season ticket holders renewed for 2012. After preforming a few quick calculations, I determined that I should be able to secure my season tickets when I’m 173. Things could be worse, of course; I could be a Green Bay Packers fan…and on their season ticket waiting list. I’d probably have to wait until I’m bout 206

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Perhaps the person most damaged by Susan G. Komen for the Cure’s epic screw-up is the organization’s namesake. Nancy Brinker founded the organization to honor her late sister’s memory, and she’s ended up sullying her sister’s name AND her memory. Well played….

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Here’s something I never, EVER want to see on my Internet tubes EVER again: Before Rehab, Demi Moore Was Pounding Red Bulls at Miley Cyrus’ Penis Cake Party. Eww…thanks for that mental picture, y’all….

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Is it just me…or is Paul Ryan truly the Black Angel of Death? What Would Ayn Rand Do? Ryan could probably quote you chapter and verse.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on February 4, 2012 5:32 AM.

Mitt Romney 2012: Take it from Mitt; it ain't easy being poor was the previous entry in this blog.

Republicans see a level playing field; the rest of us see an elevated green at a country club is the next entry in this blog.

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