January 3, 2013 5:21 AM

Today's communique from our new idiocracy: Lest you think America will be any saner in 2013....

San Jose Police located the vehicle traveling near Southwest Expressway and Bascom Avenue and the man immediately came to a stop. The subject exited the vehicle naked and brandishing a large Samurai sword saying, “You’re going to have to kill me” several times.

Naked New Years Day Samurai Captured by Police: The NRA immediately released a statement reiterating their position that the only way to solve our naked samurai problem is to give more samurai swords to unbalanced naked people.

Cops: Woman, 50, Battered Boyfriend, 32, Because Six Came Before Nine: This, guys, is why for a gentleman it’s always “ladies first.”

Paparazzo Run Over While Trying to Take Photo of Justin Bieber Near LA Freeway: Today’s example of natural selection at work. I should feel guilty for not being particularly upset over this sort of thing…but I really don’t.

Woman Jailed For Attacking Beau Over Bad Sex: We can only hope that this didn’t result in a pregnancy.

Greenwich Village “Hippies” Arrested With Powerful Explosives, Sawed-Off Shotgun and ‘Terrorist Encyclopedia’: It was his first time; he probably wanted to be certain he understood the instructions.

10 Food Sculptures Too Incredible To Eat: Bacon makes EVERYTHING better….

Important Question: Which World Leader Would Win In a Fight to the Death?: Having evidently solved all other pressing problems facing the world today….

Port Authority ventilated due to strong gas smell: It appears the wind was coming from the west and blowing over New Jersey.

How Not to Rescue Someone Who’s Fallen Into a Frozen Lake: Or, “How Not to Turn a Rescue Situation Into a Potential Audition for the Darwin Awards.”

The Guide To Hosting A Kick Ass Party For The Big Game: PRO TIP- Don’t get your sushi from a gas station. You can thank me later.

Don’t Report a Home Invasion if You’re Growing 110 Weed Plants in Your Spare Bedroom: You’d think this would be self-evident, but it seems as if every year ‘round about this time, I have to issue this public service reminder all over again.

2012: The year Irish newspapers tried to destroy the web: Today on “People Who Clearly Don’t Understand How Da Interwebs Tubes work”….

blog comments powered by Disqus


Technorati search

» Blogs that link here

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on January 3, 2013 5:21 AM.

Who says history isn't meaningful? It kept us from having to say "President Romney".... was the previous entry in this blog.

A big reason why the NRA never loses an argument is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.

Contact Me

Powered by Movable Type 5.2.2