This idea of background checks is very concerning given the fact that the United States military has been increasingly showing hostility toward evangelicals and Catholics as being somehow threats to national security and people that need to be watched. Well, what does that have to do with gun control? Well, what happens if all the sudden you are identified as an evangelical, bible-believing fundamentalist and the government decides you’ve got to be put on a watch list? Part of the provisions of this background check is kind of a system where if a caution comes up when they put your name in, you don’t get a chance to buy a gun.
You’d think that it takes some time, effort, and self-delusion to develop a Grade A persecution complex. Whiile it does take a modicum of self-delusion, all it really takes besides that is someone as self-important and arrogant as Tony Perkins, who’s now heavily invested in convincing Christians that they’re about to become the victim of government persecution (‘Cuz you know how much the Black Guy in the White House © HATES Jesus).
Perkins, who’s evidently sufficiently blessed to have a direct line of communication with God His Own Self, is beating the drums in an attempt to convince his fellow paranoid Christians that universal background checks will really be a smoke screen. Yes, it seems that the background checks will be designed with the ultimate goal of keeping Bible-thumpers from purchasing guns. Of all of the crazy, paranoid conspiracy theories to emerge from the morass that is Gun Nut Nation, Perkins’ fevered ramblings have to be number one with a bullet (pun fully intended, BTW). It’s Fearmongering 101: if you can’t win on the facts, find an available bogeyman (in this case, the Black Guy in the White House ©) and paint him as fairly foaming at the mouth to deprive you over your God-given rights as a ‘Murrican.
So, to recap, in Perkins’ mind, the military is hostile to Roman Catholics and evangelical Christians (a ridiculous claim); Roman Catholics and evangelical Christians have been deemed a potential threat to national security (an equally ridiculous claim); the federal government may be inclined to put these Christians on a watch list (still ridiculous); leading to laws that prevent Christians from buying firearms (you see where I’m going with this).
This nonsense was then picked up by World Net Daily, Sen. Rand Paul’s (R-Ky.) favorite conspiracy theory website, which never saw a nutty idea it didn’t want to publish.
Hey, it could happen, right? Well sure, in the same way that I’ll be spending a naked weekend with the Swedish Bikini Team. And because it COULD happen, that means Bible-thumpers all across this great land must remain vigilant. You might not think so now, but tomorrow, next week, perhaps even next month, the Black Guy in the White House © will be coming for your guns. Once he has your guns, it won’t be long before he comes for your women, your children, and worst of all, and your Bibles.
It could happen (at least in Tony Perkins’ imagination), and so therefore Bible-thumpers must remain vigilant against a threat…that only exists because Perkins is in bed with the NRA (and, like you, I could REALLY live without that mental picture).
So what have we learned here? Well, I’m thinking the lesson to be learned is that we should never underestimate the ability of the Hyperreligious Right to invent ways to paint themselves as an oppressed majority. Hey, if the Black Guy in the White House © is willing to prevent Fundamentalist Christians from purchasing guns, how long before his Islamofascist overlords force Sharia upon us all?
Hey, it COULD happen…right??
