September 18, 2013 6:18 AM

Today on "Great Moments In Village Idiots With Small Penises"

Earlier this month, two men decided to wander into a crowded farmers market in Appleton, Wisconsin each with an AR-15 assault rifle strapped across their back. They did not make it to the market. After several residents called 911, expressing concerns about the two gun-toting men. Police briefly detained the men, with at least one officer drawing his weapon after they determined that the assault rifles were real. The men were briefly handcuffed and detained but were eventually released without citations. Although open carry is legal in Wisconsin, police say they stopped the men to prevent a panic — “walking into a farmers market filled with a couple thousand individuals would be a recipe for disaster.” Yet the a county attorney told the Appleton Post-Crescent that the men could not be charged because “they had not made it to the farmers market” at the point when they were stopped and the men are reportedly considering a lawsuit against the police.

I’ve been trying hard to understand the viewpoint of those who feel the 2nd Amendment gives them the right to do anything and go anywhere with any type of firepower. Try as I might, though, I can’t begin to understand the mindset of those who see nothing amiss with wandering into a crowded farmer’s market with an AR-15 slung over their shoulder.

And these reprobates claimed with no hint of irony that they were carrying an assault rifle for “self-defense?” Do they fear the hippie playing the banjo? The farm family selling produce? Or perhaps the street entertainer juggling and performing magic tricks? Maybe the single mother selling muffins is the leader of an al-Qaeda sleeper cell? Or are they so starved for attention and their 15 minutes of fame that they’d resort to being complete, senseless assholes who care for their guns more than life itself? Nothing screams “moral midget with a tiny penis” louder than people who see nothing wrong with scaring innocent men, women, and children in order to make a point no one understands.

The 2nd Amendment is not a license to be an asshole. It doesn’t supersede common sense and consideration for the safety and well-being of others. And it certainly doesn’t mean that “open carry” gives gun nuts the right to bring an assault rifle into a crowded public gathering place in the name of “self-defense.”

The 2nd Amendment is neither sacrosanct, inviolate, or immune from common sense and simple human decency. If you think that carrying an AR-15 into a farmer’s marker is the perfect way to demonstrate your inalienable rights as an American to carry an assault rifle anywhere you see fit, I’d submit that you’re one sick, addled excuse for a human being.

That these moral midgets are considering suing the police department for denying them their 2nd Amendment “rights” is something that should anger any decent, clear-thinking American. Even if you believe the 2nd Amendment is more important than God His Own Self, how can you argue with the premise that common sense should prevail when it comes to carrying weaponry in public places? Or do you really think your “rights” trump any and all other considerations, even public safety?

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on September 18, 2013 6:18 AM.

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