December 13, 2013 4:59 AM

Today's nominee for Headline of the Year: What's been seen cannot be unseen

(thanks to mi compadre, Harold Cook, for this classic)

Jose Canseco pulled over by cops, with goat wearing diaper in his car

Former Major League Baseball player Jose Canseco easily wins the headline of the day. You obviously have already read the headline if you clicked on the article and, yes, it is true. The one and only Jose Canseco continued to entertain us with unbelievable events with his latest escapade ending with flashing lights in his rear-view mirror. Canseco was pulled over by the police on Wednesday evening and the cops got a wonderful surprise. Canseco had a goat in the back of his car. To make matters better, the goat was wearing a diaper.

Some people achieve greatness through hard work and dedication to their craft. Some achieve greatness through the good fortune of being in the right place at the right time. Then there’s Jose Canseco, who achieved his version of greatness by virtue of attracting attention for things the rest of us could never dream of…much less do.

When I ran across the phrase, “goat wearing diaper in his car,” Jose Canseco was a name that sprung immediately to mind. Perhaps it’s just that the Cuban-American half of the former Bash Brothers has a way of finding himself in situations that no one else could possibly envision. Perhaps it’s that Canseco never seems to shy aware from publicity that might thoroughly embarrass most of us. I suppose when you’re larger than life, any publicity is good publicity, no? The idea of driving around with a diaper-wearing goat in the back seat of his car is something that Canseco can make seem perfectly normal. One of the things I like about Canseco is that he seems perfectly comfortable with himself and not at all embarrassed by some of the odd situations he finds himself in.

So he had a goat with intestinal issues in his back seat. Why WOULDN’T he put a diaper on it? Most of us would never consider the possibility of having a goat in the back seat of our automobile. Canseco not only took his out for a ride, he provided for the goat’s comfort and well being. Classy, no?

Of course, the question no one seems to be asking (possibly because no one really wants to know the answer) is why the diaper-clad goat was in Canseco’s back seat. I suppose some questions are probably better left unasked…because the mental picture it might create is truly disturbing.

WHAT HAS BEEN SEEN CANNOT BE UNSEEN.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on December 13, 2013 4:59 AM.

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