April 25, 2014 7:32 AM

Today on "The Schadenfrede Report": "Patriots" should be careful who they hitch their wagon to, eh?

“I want to tell you one more thing I know about the Negro,” he said. Mr. Bundy recalled driving past a public-housing project in North Las Vegas, “and in front of that government house the door was usually open and the older people and the kids — and there is always at least a half a dozen people sitting on the porch — they didn’t have nothing to do. They didn’t have nothing for their kids to do. They didn’t have nothing for their young girls to do…. “And because they were basically on government subsidy, so now what do they do?” he asked. “They abort their young children, they put their young men in jail, because they never learned how to pick cotton. And I’ve often wondered, are they better off as slaves, picking cotton and having a family life and doing things, or are they better off under government subsidy? They didn’t get no more freedom. They got less freedom.”

A very wise man once imparted wisdom to me that’s served me well throughout my life:

“Karma can be a real bitch.”

The denouement of Cliven Bundy’s 15 minutes of fame is leaving copious amounts of egg on the faces of “Libertarians” who rushed to his defense in his quixotic battle/tantrum against the Bureau of Land Management. Many were incensed that Bundy was being “railroaded” and “bullied” by the federal government, at least from their point of view. Bundy’s been grazing his cattle for years on BLM land while refusing to pay for the privilege, something I like to call “getting something for nothing.” Except that, unbeknown to moi, “getting something for nothing” is only a problem only if you call the left side of the political spectrum home. Then it’s also known as “dependence” or “sucking at the teat of Big Government.”

In the case of Cliven Bundy, it’s about “liberty,” “freedom” and “casting off the shackles of an oppressive government.” Anyone with a sense of history (and the absurd) will recognize Bundy’s position as the bleatings of an impotent hypocrite who believe he has the absolute right to do as he sees fit. He doesn’t recognize the federal government as even existing because it puts limits on him…and no good, God-fearing ‘Merican should be forced to put up with that, amiright?? Yet he demands that his 1st Amendment rights be respected. You’ll have to indulge me as I try to wrap my head around this one. Bundy refuses to recognize the existence and legitimacy of the federal government…but he’s demanding something that same government protects? Man, that’s some world-class hypocrisy, eh?

Evidently, in Libertarian World, you really can have your cake and eat it, too.

There are new rumors going around about Cliven. We all know that with the media, words are taken out of context, meanings are twisted, and they can take anything and turn it into what they want it to be. Cliven is a good man, he loves all people, he is not a racist man. He wants what is best for everyone.

  • Bundy Ranch Facebook Page

To say that it’s easy to poke holes in Bundy’s argument (and those of his defenders…like Sean Hannity, f’rinstance) would be an understatement of epic proportions. As far as Hannity goes, I’ll leave dismantling and skewering his hypocrisy to Jon Stewart, who has the resources and willingness to work the comedic gold mine the Hair-helmeted One truly is.

Hypocrisy is no impediment to those who who defend basic American rights- life, liberty, etc., etc.- from the privations of a corrupt government bent on grinding patriots like Cliven Bundy into dust. Except that when you delve into the tangled web that is Bundy’s thinking, what you’ll find is just another reactionary, garden variety racist.

Yes, the man who drew the support of an armed militia determined to protect him from an “oppressive government” is an unreconstructed racist. The “hero” whom the Tea Party and most of the talking head on Fox News Channel held up as their cause celebre du jour believes that African-Americans are lazy, shiftless, ne’er-do-wells who were much better off under the order and regimentation of slavery.

If you’re waiting for the inevitable condemnations of Bundy’s racism that will come as surely as the sun rises in the east…you’re going to be waiting for a while.

Yes, kids, it’s that awkward moment when the Angry White Men who rushed to Bundy’s defense are struggling to reconcile their defense of his “liberty” and “freedom” with his unabashed and unapologetic racism. Wait for it….

If you stick your head into the Right-wing Echo Chamber, all you’ll hear are crickets, because those on the Far Right who stood firmly behind Bundy are stuck. Do they jump off the Bundy Bandwagon and risk being exposed as hypocrites and opportunists? Or do they stay on board hoping to ride out the storm…only to be revealed as every bit the racist their erstwhile hero is?

My goodness, but I do love serving up a healthy helping of Schadenfreude. Perhaps you’d like some of today’s side dishes: racism, hypocrisy, and self-interest?? And how about washing it down with a nice cold bottle of ignorance, double standards, and failed propaganda? Drinks are on the house, ladies and gentlemen…because after the fiasco that is the Battle of Bundy Ranch, you’re going to need a drink or six.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on April 25, 2014 7:32 AM.

Cliven Bundy: Sow the wind....reap the Twitter was the previous entry in this blog.

More writer's humor: Syntax am overrated is the next entry in this blog.

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