September 10, 2014 5:54 AM

This makes me miss the reports about Kate Middleton's boobs

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—CNN kicked off its coverage of the latest royal pregnancy on Monday by simulating the journey of Prince William’s sperm to Kate Middleton’s egg.

Holding two plastic models of the Windsors’ reproductive cells, the CNN host Don Lemon offered viewers a dramatic re-creation of the path taken by the royal spermatozoon.

The CNN president Jeff Zucker praised the demonstration, calling it “the perfect way to kick off our twenty-four-hour coverage of this story for the next nine months.”

“This is the most important story of the year, and we plan to throw everything at it,” Zucker said, adding that he was reassigning reporters who are currently working from Ukraine.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on September 10, 2014 5:54 AM.

The reason why Roger Goodell should do the right thing and resign was the previous entry in this blog.

Conservatives: If not for self-delusion, they'd have no delusions at all is the next entry in this blog.

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