A 2009 study from Ohio State University published in the International Journal of Press/Politics, found that conservatives were more likely to think that Stephen Colbert only pretends to be joking and actually means what he says and dislikes liberals.
The perorations of the Conservative hive-mind never cease to amaze and amuse. The capacity for finding things to be outraged about- accurate or otherwise- is truly the stuff of legend. As the “controversy” over Bruce Springsteen performing John Fogerty’s “Fortunate Son” at the Concert for Valor for continues to be a thing, I’ve been struck by…well, by how just plain stupid the whole thing is. IF those Conservative who’ve taken Springsteen to task had bothered to peruse the lyrics of “Fortunate Son,” they’d know that the song is neither anti-military nor anti-soldier. They would have also realized that
It is anti-rich-politicians-sending-poor-people-to-die-kill-and-fight-their-wars-for-them. It is pro-soldier in that it wants soldiers to actually not be killed.
But then Conservatives have always had a thing for war…as long as someone else is taking fire on the battlefield.
Fogerty’s lyrics decry a system in which the poor and middle class were far more likely to find themselves fighting and dying in a far-flung foreign war than were the children of wealth and privilege who had people to pull strings for them. Then again, Conservatives LOVE war, because for most of them it’s an abstract concept. It’s always SO much easier to get behind a war when you know there’s ZERO chance you’ll be seeing combat in it.
What’s even more interesting about the generalized Conservative outrage over “Fortunate Son” is that no one has ever mentioned the OTHER song Springsteen played: “Born in the USA.” Again, a lap around the lyrics would show that “Born in the USA” is NOT about flag-waving and chest-thumping patriotism. Its theme is very similar to that of “Fortunate Son”. Don’t believe me? Check out the lyrics after the jump:
Born down in a dead man’s town/The first kick I took was when I hit the ground You end up like a dog that’s been beat too much/ ‘Til you spend half your life just covering up now Got in a little hometown jam /So they put a rifle in my hand Sent me off to a foreign land/ To go and kill the yellow man Come back home to the refinery/Hiring man says, ‘Son, if it was up to me…’ Went down to see my VA man/He said, ‘Son, don’t you understand?’ I had a brother at Khe Sanh/ fighting off the Viet Cong They’re still there, he’s all gone/ He had a woman he loved in Saigon I got a picture of him in her arms now Down in the shadow of the penitentiary/ Out by the gas fires of the refinery I’m ten years burning down the road/ Nowhere to run, ain’t got nowhere to go.
There’s NOTHING in there that screams “flag waving” or “reflexive, unthinking patriotism.” Quite the opposite. Yet Conservatives from the time of Ronald Reagan have glommed onto “Born in the USA” in an attempt to wrap themselves in hard-driving guitar- and drum-fueled patriotism.
‘MERICA!!! F—K YEAH!!!
Have y’all never bothered to read or listen to the lyrics? ‘Cuz if you had, you wouldn’t be using “Born in the USA” as some sort of proto-patriotic anthem.
For whatever reason(s), Conservatives don’t seem to be able to grasp nuance or humor. If you’re a Conservative and you disagree with me, allow me to counter by asking a question: Name one Conservative comedian who’s actually funny. And no, you don’t get to use Dennis Miller. Since he became Fox News Channel comedy bureau chief, he’s become tired, pedantic, and frankly insufferable. Conservatives just aren’t funny.
But conservatives, you aren’t really good with nuance, ideas, substance or irony. Just last week, I wrote about Jody Hice, the radio show host, Baptist minister and congressman (R-Ga.) who actually cited a satirical essay he mistook for a true confession of homosexual sin. Though the author of the essay explained it was satire in the opening line, in his book It’s Now or Never: A Call to Reclaim America, Hice actually refers to “These shocking words by Michael Swift,” which “have been considered part of the ‘gay manifesto’ by many, and reveal the radical agenda that is currently threatening our nation:” And Hice isn’t the only one who doesn’t get it. Traditional Values Coalition includes the essay in its video Gay Rights, Special Rights.
Wow. Just…wow.
Perhaps this is why it can be so difficult to engage in a debate with a Conservative on the merits of an issue. Not that there aren’t Conservatives capable of carrying on a rational, focused, and fact-based debate…but they’re damned hard to come by. At the risk of overgeneralizing, Conservatives are far more inclined to detour a debate into ad hominem attacks (“Typical Liberal….”). When the facts aren’t on their side- and they very often aren’t- it’s got to be tough fighting a battle you know you’re destined to lose. It’s much easier to derail a discussion into something that will leave you feeling as if you’ve won…and what better way to emerge feeling victorious that an ad hominem attack on your adversary? Facts don’t work well as a defense against cheap personal insults
Ah, but I digress….
My point is that Conservatives are great at finding things to be outraged about. What they’re not at all good at doing is digging beneath the surface and getting at the truth. When you’re unable to grasp nuance…well, you’re a hammer and everything’s bound to look like a nail.
IF you’re going to take Bruce Springsteen to task for being “disrespectful” and “unpatriotic,” at least take the time to understand what it is you’re angry over. If you can’t be bothered to do that and you go with your immediate, overly emotional reaction, you can’t claim to be surprised when people like me take you to task for not bothering to do your homework and being right about what you’re so worked up about.
There’s an old Conservative strategy that holds if you can deflect attention from a Liberal’s message onto meaningless side issues, that will become the media’s focus. This is a big reason why many Conservatives don’t even bother with things like fact checking and research. All they have to do is get people talking about something meaningless and unrelated…and they’ve already won, because their adversary’s message will be drowned in a blizzard of bullshit, propaganda, and double-speak. Sometimes it’s just SO much easier when you don’t have to trouble yourself with the truth.
When it comes to “Fortunate Son” and “Born in the USA,”
[B]oth songs are part of a tradition which defends the powerless and critiques the powerful. No wonder conservatives are so afraid of it.
Indeed.
