The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Today is Christmas Day, which for many of us primates is a time to reflect. Writers tend to be fairly introspective sorts to begin with, and I’m certainly not one prone to breaking that mold. Even as I’ve volunteered to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day so my colleagues with small children can enjoy a family day, I find myself contemplating what this year has meant to me.
Even as 2014 has been a truly crappy year in the collective sense, for me it’s been astonishing. I rediscovered my family and along with it myself. I have someone in my life who means the world to me and I to her. I look forward to marrying her on August 1st like few things I’ve ever look forward to in my life. I can say that I’m happy…and for the first time in my life I know what that means.
Artistically, I feel as if I’ve truly discovered myself. All of the hard work I’ve put in learning to play the guitar over the past almost four years has paid off…and I can actually play the damned thing. I have a lot to learn…and always will, but the challenge that music presents (because it doesn’t come easily to me) has been one of the best gifts I could have given myself. Perhaps the best side effect of playing the guitar is the artistic impact it’s had on my writing. I’ve always known I could write and write well, but now I KNOW it. Writing has always been and easy and natural thing for me, but now it’s not only easy and natural, I can feel it in a way I never have before. My confidence and creativity has never been higher, and writing has come to feel like painting- complete with flow, lines, and color that I use to paint a picture. I see the artistic nature of my creative gift in a way I never have before- richer, deeper, and joyful.
The short version of all this is that is doesn’t suck to be Jack. Truly. I’m in a very good place, and life feels pretty good. I’m excited about the future and what it might hold. Today I’m feeling very, very grateful…for the things I’ve had to get through to get to where I am, for the people in my life, for the person who’s changed my life, and for those of you who still, after all these more than 13 years, keep coming back here. I may never make a dime off my writing, but I have an audience for what I do, and that’s a pretty amazing and special thing. It’s not something I take for granted.
I hope that all of you will have a safe and happy holiday wherever today finds you. May the coming year be a good one for you and yours, and may we all find ourselves back here next Christmas.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hannuka, Joyous Kwanzaa, Happy Festivus…whatever the flavor of your holiday may be. Now get off the Internet and spend some quality time with your loved ones!!
