DEA agent cites ‘science’ to warn Utah lawmakers about fearless stoned rabbits
DEA warns of stoned rabbits if Utah passes medical marijuana
Utah is considering a bill that would allow patients with certain debilitating conditions to be treated with edible forms of marijuana. If the bill passes, the state’s wildlife may “cultivate a taste” for the plant, lose their fear of humans, and basically be high all the time. That’s according to testimony presented to a Utah Senate panel (time stamp 58:00) last week by an agent of the Drug Enforcement Administration.
Welcome to today’s episode of “Great Moments in Reefer Madness,” in which an agent of the federal Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) attempts to convince Utah lawmakers that marijuana is the Devil’s Weed. Seems that it works it’s evil magic on wild rabbits, who lose their fear of humans once they’re stoned. Hell, most humans lost their fear of humans when they’re stoned, yet they remain a threat only to themselves. They might be jonesing for your family-size bag of Doritos or a tray of brownies, but if they’re stoned, they’re more likely than not to be quite placid.
The idea that wild rabbits might become fearless and overly friendly when stoned 24/7/365 would seem a potential problem really only if you’re armed with a bag of carrots. Even then, the only threat a rabbit would pose would be diving into the bag of carrots if you were to leave it unattended.
Then again, if you’re a veteran drug warrior, who deals “in facts” or “in science,” you’re worried about medical marijuana somehow leading to bunnies stoned 26 hours a day, eight days a week. There’s no doubt that illegal marijuana growing operations can have deleterious impacts on the environment. Remediating that impact could be a profound argument for legalizing marijuana, or at the very least legalizing medical marijuana. There’s no reason that regulation growing operations couldn’t and shouldn’t be part of the process.
Methinks perhaps someone’s been watching “Reefer Madness” on an endless loop. Come back to me when they begin taking the threat posed to society by rampant alcohol abuse seriously.
