Think about all the things you look for in a presidential candidate: a solid economic plan. Maybe some foreign policy experience. And how about insatiable bloodlust and multiple rows of serrated teeth? As it turns out, the shark from the Jaws movies has better favorability numbers than any politician included in the latest Washington Post-ABC News survey. Ditto for The Terminator. Same for Darth Vader.
We’re in the midst of that wonderful time before things get serious, when anyone and everyone with an ego and the willingness/ability to embarrass themselves on a national stage decides they’re qualified to be President.
(Even I could do it- Hell, I ran for Governor of Texas in 2004…and was quite likely the first candidate to ever spend $0.00 on their campaign. I’m probably as qualified to be President as at least half of the current field…not that should be considered a good thing. Half the current field is arguable inept and incapable of exhibiting any behavior save for that normally associated with attention whores.)
Few are anything resembling qualified, and by this time next year, intellectual and moral lightweights like Carly Fiorina, Lindsey Graham, and Martin O’Malley will have long since become historical footnotes in the inevitable historical dissections of the 2016 campaign yet to be written. The GOP Primary/Beauty Contest season will have winnowed the contenders from the pretenders, and voters will be left to choose between candidates who want to nuke Iran and those who merely want to bomb it back to the Stone Age. Oh, and let’s not forget BENGHAZI!!!!!
Still, the idea that the animatronic shark from Jaws is polling better than every announced candidate is as humorous as it is an indication of the (relative lack of) quality of the field. It’s not difficult to understand why Americans aren’t doing cartwheels over the 20+ candidates currently riding in the GOP clown car or the three Democrats who’ve announced thus far. Part of it is that November, 2016, is still 16+ months away. Being a front runner this early is not always a good thing, except perhaps from a fundraising standpoint. It’s difficult to maintain momentum over the long haul in an era of sound bites and shrinking attention spans…so why are so many in the race this soon? And will any candidate actually manage to forge a message that appeals to voters and actually make sense?
It’s entirely possible that there’s a candidate- as yet unannounced- who will articulate a vision for the country not based on partisan rhetoric but on common sense and the recognition that we’re all in this together. ‘Course, it’s also entirely possible that Pee Wee Herman will douse himself with gasoline in Columbus Circle and light a blowtorch. It could happen, right???
Wake me up when Gary Sinise and Vince Vaughn announce that they’re forming “exploratory committees” with an eye towards running for the GOP nomination. Perhaps then someone will talk Ed Begley and Marf Ruffalo into running as Democrats. Hey, at least that way the actors running for President could be said to have some talent.
