February 20, 2016 6:26 AM

What happens in Texas doesn't always stay in Texas

The Texas State Board of Education (SBOE) has a regrettable — but reliable — history of mixing the culture wars with public education. And, it seems, almost every election cycle…at least one candidate promises to make things even worse. This year is not different. Meet Mary Lou Bruner. If you keep an eye on the SBOE like we do here at TFN, you might have seen her at a hearing here or two railing against Muslims…. From Bruner’s postings we know that if she wins the March 1 Republican primary…and again in the November general, the board will have a member who, among other things, calls evolution a plot to promote godlessness, says slavery did not become an issue until the Civil War was well underway, and subscribes to a variety of fringe conspiracy theories — including a claim that President Obama once financed a drug habit by working as a prostitute.

There are certainly things I miss about living in Texas- the food, the music, Austin for starters- but one of the big things I don’t miss is what can only be described as a malevolent atmosphere of bat-$#!& crazy. When the truly, deeply stupid and intolerant are the ones charged with educating children…well, Houston, we most definitely have a problem, knowhutimean?

In any other state, there’d be no real reason for anyone fortunate enough to be on the outside looking in to know, understand, or even acknowledge such wackadoodle shenanigans. The reason Texas has an impact is that, as the country’s largest textbook market, publishers often play to their tune- meaning that students outside Texas may well be taught using the same heavily propagandized and religiously-themed textbooks approved by the Texas State Board of Edumication (SBOE).

When little Johnny comes home asking how it is that Jesus was able to ride a dinosaur into battle against the Nazis…you can blame it on fine, upstanding Christian edumicators like Mary Lou Bruner, a former teacher and certifiable hyper-Christian loon who’s running for a seat on the 15-member SBOE. While I suspect her heart is in the right place and she means well, Ms. Bruner should under no conceivable circumstances be allowed within 10 kilometers of a textbook.

Now comes a serious contender for the 15-member State Board of Education, the body that enacted curriculum guidelines requiring students to learn about Confederate heroes, and required teachers to explain the equivalency of Abraham Lincoln’s and Jefferson Davis’s inaugural addresses, as well as the ways international institutions such as the United Nations threaten U.S. sovereignty.

Republican candidate Mary Lou Bruner might fit right in—and move seamlessly from her current gig as vocal critic of the board to elected board member.

The retired teacher has written that “Evolution is a religious philosophy with propaganda supporting the religion of Atheism.” She also claims that scientists have ignored and hidden evidence that humans and dinosaurs walked the planet at the same time.

You have to know that Bruner is straying off the intellectual reservation when she refers to “the religion of Atheism.” I suspect if you asked a few probing questions, you’d discover she has no clue what she’s talking about. Atheism is “[t]he doctrine or belief that there is no God”…or any sort of supreme being or entity. Atheism is not a “religion;” it’s the absence of any sort of belief characteristic of a religion. That Bruner doesn’t seem (or care to) understand that basic distinction is enough for me to question her qualifications to have anything at all to do with edumication.

Bruner, in fact, has written about the extinction of dinosaurs. “When the flood waters subsided and rushed into the oceans there was no vegetation on the earth because the earth had been covered with water… . The dinosaurs on [Noah’s ark] may have been babies and not able to reproduce…. After the flood, the few remaining Behemoths and Leviathans may have become extinct because there was not enough vegetation on earth for them to survive to reproductive age.”

Meanwhile, “Climate change has nothing to do with weather or climate, it’s all about system change from capitalism (free enterprise) to Socialism-Communism. The Climate Change HOAX was Karl Marx’s idea. It took time to ‘condition’ the people so they would believe such a HOAX!”

I almost don’t even know where to begin…but suffice it to say that if you’re having trouble distinguishing a science textbook from your Bible, you shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near anything that might impact a child’s edumication.

This silliness isn’t even the worst and/or most offensive part of Bruner’s ideology/theology/edumicational philosophy. No, the worst and easily most offensive aspect of her intellectual landscape/moral/theological landscape is her willingness to level cheap and wholly unsupported accusations against The Black Guy in the White House ©. Evidently, a President is worthy of respect only when he/she’s White, Christian, and Conservative.

“Obama has a soft spot for homosexuals because of the years he spent as a male prostitute in his twenties. That’s how he paid for his drugs. He has admitted he was addicted to drugs when he was young and he is sympathetic with homosexuals; but he hasn’t come out of the closet about his own homosexual/bisexual background.”

No wonder Obummer has such a soft spot for gays and lesbians: HE’S ONE OF THEM!!!

Even if he was: SO WHAT?? That sort of things should only matter to homophobes deeply insecure about their own sexuality…but terrified of what examining that fear might reveal. No, better to level ridiculous, unprovable accusations against *The Black Guy in the White House © than to be honest about what you’re seeing in the mirror.

It would be bad enough if Bruner could be considered an anomaly, an intellectual and moral outlier refusing to take her Thorazine and suffering from a low-grade Messiah complex and/or delusions of adequacy. This being Texas we’re talking about, Bruner is merely one of what’s a very large roster of religious crazies, anti-intellectual zealots, and barely lucid control freaks who believe their God should by rights be our government…AND the centerpiece of your children’s edumication.

When your precious snowflake comes home from school convinced that Earth is only 6000 years old, you may just owe Mary Lou Bruner a shout out. Or a swift kick in the ass.

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This page contains a single entry by Jack Cluth published on February 20, 2016 6:26 AM.

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