(Ed. note: I wrestled with the appropriateness of airing some of the truly offensive ridiculousness Morrow is becoming infamous for. In the final analysis, I felt it was important to illustrate the astonishing childishness and moral vacancy of the reprobate just elected to lead the Travis County GOP. It speaks to the willingness of Conservatives to tolerate morally offensive behavior among their own.)
I hope Mark Sanford loses because he is a metrosexual douchebag who had a wife with no tits & he can't control his Argentine whore.
— Robert Morrow (@RobMorroLiberty) April 22, 2013
Robert Morrow is the newest Republican Party chair of Travis County, the Texas territory that contains the state capital, Austin. He appears to be an absolute lunatic. I don’t mean “Donald Trump” crazy, or “Rand Paul” crazy. Between his tweets, public statements, and website, he is “I’m wearing pants made out of snakes, I am Son of God” crazy. According to the Texas Tribune, the state GOP is “apoplectic” over Morrow’s ascent to chairman, in spite of his long record of completely batshittedness. He seems to spend most of his time being angry about the existence of the Clinton family (indeed, he co-authored a book titled “The Clintons’ War on Women” with another recent crazy person in the news, Roger Stone).
Even after 10+ years in Texas, I could never get a handle on what it is about Texas Republicans that makes so many of them so…well, bat$#!& crazy. In a state that’s produced the likes of Tom DeLay, Louie Gohmert, Pete Olsen, and Joe Barton, among others, abject unmedicated lunacy is very often the norm, the baseline by which the Republican Party is measured.
It’s not a pretty picture, but just when I’d begun to think there was NO WAY anyone could take bat$#!& crazy to previously unknown levels…well, say hello to the new chair of the Travis County GOP, Robert Morrow. To call the new chairman a freak show would be an insult to the deeply and dangerously disturbed.
He seems nice enough….
The question of how a reprobate with a social media trail like Robert Morrow could have ever risen to the chairmanship of one of the largest county GOP organizations in Texas is fascinating in its own right…but that’s a story best left for another time. My interest is in Morrow, who, even for a Texas Republican is too far “out there” to believe.
Outside of being rude, offensive, disrespectful, and completely inappropriate virtually 24/7, I suspect he’s a peach of a guy…who’s managing to turn the Travis County GOP into a laughing stock.
Robert Morrow’s second in command in Travis County told the Tribune that “he is a total disaster” and that “I will not rest until we remove him as chairman.” Morrow’s response: “Tell them they can go fuck themselves.”
Morrow’s social media presence is…distressing for any adult male, much less one elected to a leadership position in a political party. His Facebook page features reposts from pages like “I Really Like Boobs,” and includes pictures of women with freakishly large cleavage. His Twitter feed is even better…if by “better,” you mean “completely out of control and horribly inappropriate for anyone in a public position.”
Some of the highlights lowlights from his Twitter feed include (and I’m not trying to be gratuitously offensive):
- Why does Bill Clinton pull his dick out so much?
- If I don’t suck some big ole titties sometime in the near future… I…AM…GOING…TO…FUCKING…DIE
- If you google “Robert Morrow 11 inch penis confirmed” you get over 11,800,000 hits. I’m just sayin’ ….
- For Christ’s sake!!! How do you get Ben Wa balls out of a dachshund? Little Bushy going nuts. Help!
- Porn idea: Barbara Bush with vibrating butt plug, stroking foot long dildo while German shepherd licks peanut butter off pussy. Thoughts?
- I wonder what kind of a FOAM PARTY Marco Rubio will be attending tonight?
- Would Hillary Clinton swallow all of your cum or would it be more of a Lorena Bobbitt situation?
- I just hope to promote flushing the commode on the corroded rectum of American politics.
- Goooooooooooood Morning, Vietnam!!!
- It is very likely that Chelsea and Webb Hubbell have a secret relationship.
- I am the face of the Re-Pube-Licking Party.
- Is Donald Trump a Jesus who has come back to Earth?
- Bill Clinton has been CIA since he was recruited by them 1968 at Oxford.
- @JebBush Barbara is a drunk and your homosexual daddy cheated on her with both men and women when not killing people or running drugs.
- Guns are an insurance against govt tyranny which has murdered hundreds of millions.
- Has Eliot Spitzer choked any other women today?
- @realDonaldTrump Dear Stupid, Lyndon Johnson and the CIA murdered John Kennedy. I truly hope you come to your senses on this issue!!
- GWB paid for a white girl to have an abortion.
- Re: Hillary Clinton: you can put lipstick on an angry bull dyke, but it is still an angry bull dyke.
- NYT are you goddamn stupid or what? Oh, you don’t WANT TO TALK ABOUT BILL CLINTON’S SERIAL RAPES SINCE OXFORD!!!!
- Lyndon Johnson could murder more people on a bad day (USS Liberty - 34 murdered) than Charles Whitman on a good day.
- The Israeli Lobby can blow me. I am an American not an Israel Firster.
I’m not posting those to be crass or in an attempt to embarrass or offend anyone. These are the thoughts, such as they are, of the chairman of the Travis County Republican Party…one of the leaders of a political party that believes that God His Own Self granted Republicans dominion over Texas.
Somehow, for some reason, 25,000 Texans voted for this fine example of dog excrement on the sole of humanity:
The newly elected chair of the Republican Party in the county that includes the Texas Capitol spent most of election night tweeting about former Gov. Rick Perry’s sexual orientation and former President Bill Clinton’s penis, and insisting that members of the Bush family should be in jail.
He also found time to call Hillary Clinton an “angry bull dyke” and accuse his county vice chair of betraying the values of the Republican Party.
“The people have spoken,” Robert Morrow, who won the helm of the Travis County GOP with 54 percent of the vote, told The Texas Tribune. “My friends and neighbors and political supporters — they wanted Robert Morrow.”
If you believe that Americans get exactly the quality of leadership they deserve- I do- you’d have to think that Travis County Republicans have no standards for personal conduct. Or perhaps they, too, were so busy obsessing over Bill Clinton’s penis that they just couldn’t be bothered to pay attention.
As you might imagine, some of the good, God-fearing, patriotic Conservatives of Travis Country are apoplectic over Morrow’s ascent to power. Well, not all of them, of course. 25,000 Republicans thought Morrow could provide just the sort of prescient, inspired leadership they so desperately need.
Yep, this is one sick bastard- who was duly elected by Republican voters in Travis County. I wonder how many languages I can say “complete and total embarrassment” in?
The good news is that Democrats have been handed a gift from the benevolent God I don’t believe in. Hmm…now I’m wondering if I might need to reconsider that.
For his part, Morrow seems to be reveling in the attention he’s receiving…and not at all worried about threats made by the party’s vice-chairman. Morrow passed off any pending revolt with a succinct “and he’s a douchebag.”
Game. Set. Match.
Despite what you may think, this isn’t a short story written by Franz Kafka…but it should be fun to watch, eh?? I’m not sure there’s enough popcorn to go around.
Stay tuned. I have a feeling this is going to be all sorts of fun to watch.
