As you will recall, professional Christian scold, Mike Huckabee, asked the public to look the other way when it turned out that one of the Kardashians of Christ — Josh Duggar — is a child molester. Now, Tom DeLay has asked a judge to do likewise for Dennis Hastert. Tom and Mike have just announced that they are forming a new lobbying group to be called “Politicians Exonerating Deviants Of Sin” [D/B/A “PEDOS”]. PEDOS will help stanch the persecution of adults who touch children inappropriately, but only if those adults own Bibles, with the slogan: “Christians are nicer molesters!”
- Mrs. Betty Bowers, America’s Best Christian
This shouldn’t be breaking news to anyone who’s been paying attention to how Conservatives operate, but it seems Conservatives are falling all over themselves to vouch for the character of Dennis Hastert, the former Speaker of the House of Representatives…and now an alleged child molester. That Hastert was one of the movers and shakers behind the impeachment of then-President Bill Clinton for his sexual indiscretions is but one of the latest examples of the not even barely concealed hypocrisy driving today’s movement Conservatives.
Hastert to date has been accused of molesting four boys during his time as a wrestling coach at an Illinois high school. He’s been indicted on bank fraud charges stemming from paying millions to buy the silence of his first accuser. Keep in mind this is the same person who felt Bill Clinton’s infidelity rendered him morally unfit to sit behind the big desk in the Oval Office. Ponder that for a moment. If you can do so without indulging in a heaping helping of schadenfreude…well, you’re a far better person than I am.
Tom DeLay, known as “The Hammer” and the most powerful man in Washington during his days in Congress (and one of the smarmiest, most objectionable, and thoroughly self-righteous ambulatory meat sacks to disgrace the planet), is now vouching for Hastert’s character. I’d be laughing if the whole idea wasn’t so sick and twisted…and characteristic of the generalized amorality of today’s movement Conservatives. Just imagine this scenario for a moment: If Hastert was a Democrat, Conservatives would be lining up to compete for the “honor” of putting a bullet in his skull. He’s a Republican, though, “one of us,” as DeLay sees it, so any appearance of amorality is purely coincidental and unworthy of discussion. DeLay might well respond by quoting another famous Texas moral reprobate: “Who are you going to believe? Me? Or your lying eyes?”
Hastert has yet to be convicted, so I’ll go with the “innocent until proven guilty” theory that Conservatives would never grant a Liberal or Democrat. Hell, if Hastert was a Democrat, Republicans would have long since destroyed him and left him for dead by the side of the road…but, he’s a faithful, reliable Conservative Republican…and a “man of God,” which therefore makes him worthy of forbearance and a second chance of the sort they’d NEVER grant a Democrat.
Double standard? WHAT double standard??
