Perhaps things have changed, or perhaps my perception of reality is somewhat skewed (no surprise there), but it seems as if the world around me has become a coarser, more contentious, and more aggressively unkind place with the passage of time. Violence and the threat of violence seem almost commonplace. The default reaction for so many hovers somewhere between righteous outrage and “GO F—K YOURSELF!!”
This isn’t intended as a riff on the belief that the world’s going to Hell in a handbasket (something I never really did understand), rather more as an examination of what it is that drives us to react with anger and disdain when it would be easier and far less taxing to show kindness…or smile at the very least.
In today’s rancorous America, it seems the default reaction- at least in the public domain- is anger, vitriol, disdain, and in some cases even the threat of violence. There are those public figures- and I think we all know to whom I’m referring- who understand they in reality have little of value to offer. They surmount that shortcoming and assuage their considerable ego by being outrageous and controversial. They attract attention- and thus treatment as a Very Serious Person- by engaging in all manner of hatred directed at other individuals and classes of people. They tear others down in order that they may build themselves up. They have nothing to offer, and they offer an overabundance of it.
In short, they’re assholes…and they revel in it.
On some level, I suppose it’s much easier to stoke someone’s fears and prejudices than to appeal to reason, decency, and/or a sense of shared humanity. It’s easier to blame others- minorities, gays, immigrants, non-Christians, etc., ad infinitum, ad nauseam- for real and/or perceived problems than it is to formulate ideas that could help facilitate coming together to address and solve those problems.
When you get right down to it, being an asshole is about being lazy. It means one has no problem bitching, complaining, and holding forth at some considerable length about the problems facing our country…and also that one can’t be bothered to actually DO something constructive. Someone else is always the problem, which means that it probably feels right and appropriate to expect someone else to be responsible for finding a solution.
If only people were more like…well, like you, right??
If you believe others to be the cause of, and/or responsible for finding the solution to, you’ve- at least in your own mind- just freed yourself from any responsibility to play a role in fixing things.
No problem is insurmountable if we decide to work together to resolve it. Then again, that requires real work- discussion, listening, compromise, willingness to follow through- which is more responsibility than many Americans are willing to take on. No, it’s far easier to kibbitz from afar and take solace in the knowledge that if only more Americans thought like you….
If you believe- or worse, live- this, you might want to take a good, long look in the mirror. You might just be an asshole.
