Recently in Speak slowly; I'm a History major Category
- June 23, 2012
A lesson I'm still trying to learn - June 2, 2012
Happy Caturday: The reason why so many single guys have cats - May 25, 2012
Going vegetarian: Reason #243 - May 23, 2012
Conclusive proof the 47% of all statistics are made up on the spot - May 22, 2012
A philosophy we should all embrace.... - May 18, 2012
And those were his admirable qualities.... - May 15, 2012
So...tell me again why legalizing marijuana will destory America as we know it.... - May 14, 2012
Today on "People Unclear On The Concept": Conservative humor and other oxymorons - May 14, 2012
4 out of 5 Tibetan Buddhist monks choose Mac over PC - May 14, 2012
Some companies want to rule the world. Apple actually does. - May 12, 2012
When neighbors fail to control their pets.... - May 12, 2012
You know you have far more money than sense when this seems like a good idea - May 9, 2012
Time to clean out the closet - May 9, 2012
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Lose an election and MSNBC loses all respect for you - May 8, 2012
The day the meow died - May 8, 2012
The Bicycle Diaries come home to Portland - May 7, 2012
Vote Republican: Because circular firing squads can be pretty entertaining - May 7, 2012
How come I wasn't invited to this Cinco de Mayo party?? - May 7, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 7, 2012
And the #1 reason for not laying off your marketing department is.... - May 6, 2012
And for dessert we'll drink the blood of their children - May 6, 2012
Where in the Bible does it say that beating children is the Christian thing to do? - May 6, 2012
Today on "People Unclear On The Concept".... - May 6, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 5, 2012
Ah...so THAT'S why people pay so much for courtside seats - May 5, 2012
Before we bomb Iran, how 'bout we see something from there that you'll never see in America - May 5, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 4, 2012
Because it's Friday, here's a wish from Yoda to start your day - May 4, 2012
Hand-holding: The gateway to evil, lascivious, animalistic sex - May 4, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 3, 2012
You know it's going to be a long season when your team is out of contention by May Day - May 3, 2012
Something to help my male readers get through their day - May 3, 2012
My first (and last) attempt to imitate Dear Abby - May 3, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 2, 2012
It's Tuesday, so here's something else to be miserable about - May 2, 2012
Inept, uncoordinated...and evidently built to stay that way - May 2, 2012
So...the keeping marijuana illegal is really all about the 1% getting rich? I'm shocked.... - May 2, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - May 1, 2012
Greetings from Floriduh: Where lack of cultural awareness is no impediment to good governance - May 1, 2012
Because it's Tuesday, here's a picture of Manhattan from 12.16.51 - May 1, 2012
Everything you need to know about the Violence Against Women Act - May 1, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 30, 2012
If you're Monday's off to a rough start, I've got just the thing for you.... - April 30, 2012
Gary Stein: If you want to exercise your 1st Amendment rights, become a civilian - April 30, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 29, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 28, 2012
The Stanley Cup Playoffs: It's the most wonderful time of the year - April 28, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 27, 2012
Everything I need to know I learned from my Dad...or not - April 27, 2012
Monica Crowley: Better to be thought to be a mean-spirited harpie than...oh, never mind.... - April 27, 2012
GOP 2012: Because common sense really IS a Liberal plot to destroy our freedom - April 27, 2012
A message from the past for today's Conservatives - April 27, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 26, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Profiles in mendacity #5 - April 26, 2012
You know you're in trouble when you can't even edit your hate properly - April 26, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 25, 2012
How long of doing more with less will it be before we're doing nothing with nothing? - April 25, 2012
You know you're about to have a VERY bad day when it begins like this - April 25, 2012
Normally, I try not to speak ill of the dead. I'll make an exception for Chuck Colson. - April 25, 2012
You know you have WAY too much time on your hands when this seems like a good idea - April 25, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 24, 2012
Substitute "writer" for "ditch digger"...and welcome to my world - April 24, 2012
Even in Portland we tend to look down on using automobiles as weapons - April 24, 2012
Those who don't know history are condemned to repeat it: they're in Congress or work for Big Oil - April 24, 2012
Today's disturbing mental picture: "I love the smell of my brother's colon" - April 24, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 23, 2012
Since it's Monday, how 'bout we start the week with some e.e.cummings? - April 23, 2012
What could happen if we stopped screaming at one another? - April 23, 2012
My parenting style...which is why I never had children ;-) - April 23, 2012
If Jesus had wanted you to think for yourself, you would have been issued a penis - April 23, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 22, 2012
I may no longer live in Texas...but the Aggie jokes never get old - April 22, 2012
I rarely wear a sports bra, but when I do I prefer it to be pink - April 22, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 21, 2012
No wonder I have trouble sleeping - April 21, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 20, 2012
Today I will calm myself by...eating cookies - April 20, 2012
Farewell to another chunk of my childhood - April 20, 2012
Mediocrity is what happens when you choose ideology over business - April 20, 2012
My next career move? - April 20, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 19, 2012
How many of us HAVEN'T thought about stripping at a TSA checkpoint? - April 19, 2012
GOP 2012: Because compassion really IS Socialism - April 19, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 18, 2012
A birthday...or just another chance to be happy I'm still drawing breath? - April 18, 2012
My new hero.... - April 18, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 17, 2012
Today I will feel empowered - April 17, 2012
If I lived in Oklahoma, I'd be worried about the threat from wild turkeys...which is why I don't live in Oklahoma - April 17, 2012
You know you're about to have a VERY bad day when.... - April 17, 2012
Propaganda 101: How Conservatives successfully flip a legitimate issue into a "scandal" - April 17, 2012
Today in creative social activism - April 16, 2012
Uh...that wasn't a chicken empanada - April 16, 2012
A car that truly rocks - April 16, 2012
How long before Arizona decides that life begins when a woman thinks about sex? - April 16, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 15, 2012
It's not football unless they're wearing push-up bras, #2 - April 15, 2012
When we call the GOP "The Party of NO!!"...there's a very good reason why - April 15, 2012
"Texas Republican" and "dishonest": As peanut butter is to jelly - April 15, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 14, 2012
Today I will protect those unable to protect themselves - April 14, 2012
Sometimes, even those who've convinced you that they represent hatefulness can surprise you - April 14, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 14, 2012
Better a grilled cheese defense than an insanity defense - April 13, 2012
Today's "How did I miss that?" news - April 13, 2012
GOP 2012: Remember, it's not a war on women if you can accuse Liberals of being behind it - April 13, 2012
Time for a refresher course?? - April 13, 2012
The latest offering from WWJD University: PoliSci 101, or "You know you're losing when...." - April 13, 2012
Today I will look on the bright side - April 13, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Profiles in mendacity #4 (Or, just what did Dan Savage have on Rick Santorum?)? - April 12, 2012
Say hello to the newest member of the clan...or not - April 12, 2012
And because it's Thursday, here's a picture of a cat riding a rooster - April 12, 2012
Allen West: And you thought McCarthyism was dead? - April 12, 2012
Today I will be grateful I'm not this guy - April 12, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 11, 2012
Idiocracy 2012: And a(n idiot) child shall lead them.... - April 11, 2012
Scott Walker: If he's good enough for the Prince of Darkness.... - April 11, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Profiles in mendacity #3 - April 11, 2012
Today on "Lifestyles of the Math-challenged and Hirsute".... - April 11, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 10, 2012
Today's gravy wrestling news.... - April 10, 2012
A lesson most Americans aren't learning - April 10, 2012
Evidently the Mayans have a wicked sense of the absurd - April 10, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 9, 2012
An uninvited guest...or a new member of the family? - April 9, 2012
Today's "WTF??" moment: A kidney for an iPad? I'd have held out for a guarantee on future upgrades. - April 9, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 8, 2012
Your moment of Zen - April 8, 2012
The winner gets a dozen glazed donuts and a caramel macchiato - April 8, 2012
Katniss Everdeen, 'A Young Sarah Palin' - April 7, 2012
Sarajevo: Remembrance is the least that can be done - April 7, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 6, 2012
Steve King: Bravely protecting this sacred land from evil, anti-American, Jesus-hating vegetarians - April 6, 2012
Today's question - April 6, 2012
Security Theater 2012: "Protecting" us from threats only the TSA has the power to see - April 6, 2012
Poverty: The most dangerous WMD - April 6, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 5, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 4, 2012
Only in Floriduh would Skittles be considered a deadly weapon - April 4, 2012
A sure sign that you just can't be bothered to pay attention - April 4, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 3, 2012
Sometimes, fighting fire with kinder fire can leave your morally bankrupt opponents defenseless - April 3, 2012
Disgrace for the Cure - April 3, 2012
Best. Field trip. EVER. - April 3, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 2, 2012
Keith Olbermann: First time...unfortunate. Second...sad. Third...a pattern. Fourth...you're a dick. - April 2, 2012
Greetings from Sodom and Gomorrah...or, as I like to call it, Oregon - April 2, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Profiles in mendacity #2 - April 2, 2012
Two very good reasons to put down that hot dog - April 2, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - April 1, 2012
Today on Schadenfreude Watch: Susan G. Komen reaping what it sowed - April 1, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 31, 2012
When satire mimics actual policy, you get our health care system - March 31, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 31, 2012
The Liberal nail that sticks up gets hammered down by Conservative reason and logic - March 30, 2012
Amerika: Stupid ain't the liability it used to be...and edumication is WAY overrated - March 30, 2012
Digging our graves with our teeth, #371 - March 30, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 29, 2012
Today's free-fire zone fashion must-have: the hoodie - March 29, 2012
The real tragedy in the Trayvon Martin case - March 29, 2012
We're only #5 when it comes to executions? It's time to step up our game, America! - March 29, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 28, 2012
Sunset at Galveston- one of the few things I miss about Texas - March 28, 2012
When a Democrats does it, it's the worst sort of Socialist tyranny. When a Republican does it, it's inspired policy. - March 28, 2012
Isn't it time we lose the hypocrisy and treat marijuana like alcohol and cigarettes? - March 28, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 27, 2012
Today on Schadenfreude Watch: Susan G. Komen reaping what it sowed - March 27, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 26, 2012
Something to make you think twice about what's in that candy bar. Hint: it's not Schadenfreude - March 26, 2012
Memo to Republicans: Truth is, stocks performs better when a Democrat's in the White House - March 26, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 25, 2012
Another WWJD Public Service: What not to wear while trying to adopt a dog - March 25, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 24, 2012
Oh, the things that happen when children travel - March 24, 2012
Football diplomacy: The path to victory (or something) in Syria - March 24, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 23, 2012
"A perfectly lubricated weather vane" - March 23, 2012
Beer: Helping creative people get laid since 1922 - March 23, 2012
Racism and Mississippi...like peanut butter and jelly, even in 2012 - March 23, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 22, 2012
...and we treat all manner of disease with only the highest quality leeches - March 22, 2012
I'm not saying we're all going to die horrible, painful, senseless deaths, but.... - March 22, 2012
Did you order an extra large sausage...pizza...or are you just glad to see me?? - March 22, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 22, 2012
Today's Creative Merchandising Fail - March 21, 2012
Dennis Terry: (Not exactly) The poster boy for Christian charity, tolerance, and forgiveness - March 21, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because who knew that the REAL threat to America is...wait for it...porn - March 21, 2012
Texas Republicans: We know lady parts best! - March 21, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 20, 2012
When you care enough to send the very breast...er, best - March 20, 2012
Today on "People Unclear On The Concept".... - March 20, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 19, 2012
Why the GOP will eventually go the way of the dinosaur - March 19, 2012
Today's communique from the Western Front in the War on Women - March 19, 2012
GOP 2012: Because America is SO much better when we react instead of think - March 19, 2012
Do you like the freedoms we enjoy today? Thank a Liberal for standing up for them. - March 19, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 18, 2012
500 monkeys with 500 iPads: The WWJD fact-checking staff - March 18, 2012
Sex: If you're not having it (and even if you are), you don't get to control what others do - March 18, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 17, 2012
Today's Rorschach test: A hot betacarotene injection...or a penis? - March 17, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.17.12) - March 17, 2012
Digging our graves with our teeth, #358 - March 17, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 16, 2012
Another WWJD Public Service...you're welcome - March 16, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.16.12) - March 16, 2012
This agression will not stand, man.... - March 16, 2012
Today's front page headline from the Schadenfreude Gazette - March 16, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 15, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.15.12) - March 15, 2012
Happy Snides of March - March 15, 2012
When Right-wing ideology is a synonym for journalism, you must be Matt Drudge - March 15, 2012
GOP 2012: Because a closed mind is a great way to ward off uncertainty - March 15, 2012
Dick Cheney: It seems Darth Vader is at heart a coward - March 15, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 14, 2012
Conservatives: Frequently wrong, but always willing to deflect responsibility for their errors - March 14, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.14.12) - March 14, 2012
Nine more hearts than Rush Limbaugh has - March 14, 2012
The Rush Limbaugh boycott: Beware the Law of Unintended Consequences - March 14, 2012
Today's Moment of Holiness: Sex is dirty (only when it's done right) - March 14, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 13, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.13.12) - March 13, 2012
Too stupid to be allowed to vote? - March 13, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 12, 2012
Doonesbury: What some newspapers refuse to let you see (3.12.12) - March 12, 2012
Congratulations...y'all just set women's basketball back 50 years - March 12, 2012
The GOP platform in 12 honest- and very accurate- sentences - March 12, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 11, 2012
Pot, meet Kettle: Rick Santorum calls Mitt Romney a liar - March 11, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 10, 2012
Sarah Palin: Uh...who gives a damn anymore? - March 10, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 9, 2012
And now for something completely different: Moscow and it's people before the Revolution - March 9, 2012
Welfare for individuals = Socialism; welfare for corporations = sound fiscal policy - March 9, 2012
It turns out that "Rush Limbaugh" is an anagram for "Conservative hate speech" - March 9, 2012
Gas prices: time to get a grip on reality, don'tchathink?? - March 9, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 8, 2012
Uh...would butt plugs be in Hardware or Home Furnishings?? Man, you can find ANYTHING at Sears! - March 8, 2012
Today on "Security Theater of the Absurd".... - March 8, 2012
Sandra Fluke: Sometimes, the mere act of carrying yourself with dignity it the best revenge - March 8, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 7, 2012
How music careers get launched - March 7, 2012
Rush Limbaugh: Schadenfreude is just another word for dancing on the grave of his career - March 7, 2012
Oxymoron alert: "Fox News Channel" and "objective journalism" - March 7, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 6, 2012
Hank the Cat for Senate: Because he's better with factual statements than Orrin Hatch or Jon Kyl - March 6, 2012
Today's hot new meme: "Who Said It- Grand Ayatollah Ali Khamenei or Rick Santorum?" - March 6, 2012
GOP 2012: Because moral courage is highly overrated and overvalued - March 6, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 5, 2012
Great moments in racist marketing tie-ins - March 5, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 5, 2012
It's beginning to feel a lot like soccer season.... - March 5, 2012
Moderates didn't leave the Republican Party; the Republican Party left the moderates - March 4, 2012
Memo to Conservatives: Condescion and smug arrogance do not a convincing argument make - March 4, 2012
For your consideration, a dissenting view on Christianity. Discuss. - March 4, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 3, 2012
Free speech may be offensive speech, but we don't have to patronize those who support it - March 3, 2012
Today's WWJD Public Service: So you want to be a con man?? - March 3, 2012
Nice to see Joe Arpaio taking on the truly intractable issue facing America: Barack Obama's birth certificate - March 3, 2012
The next time you feel moved to complain about your job.... - March 3, 2012
Fox News Channel: When you can't beat 'em, defame 'em & question their motives - March 3, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - March 2, 2012
Happy Friday! Celebrate with some Monty Python: "Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life" - March 2, 2012
If you can't say anything nice...well, you were probably Andrew Breitbart (#2) - March 2, 2012
All you need to remember Andrew Breitbart properly...in postcard form - March 2, 2012
So, Christianity and compassion really are mutually exclusive? - March 1, 2012
If you can't say anything nice...well, you were probably Andrew Breitbart - March 1, 2012
Gas prices: Efficient upward wealth redistribution (it's not Socialism when it goes upward) - March 1, 2012
Conclusive proof that the Affordable Care Act is (not exactly) an evil, leftist plot to destroy our freedom - March 1, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 29, 2012
Chardon: An opportunity to create a better world...or an opportunity that will go begging? - February 29, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: A President for the ages- The Dark Ages - February 29, 2012
Trans-vaginal ultrasounds: Or, this is why cockroaches scatter when you turn on the lights - February 29, 2012
This is why I never became an art critic - February 29, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 28, 2012
Bashir Assad: a despot and autocrat living on borrowed time - February 28, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because pissing off the Dutch is an epic win - February 28, 2012
Sometimes, doing the right thing is as simple as...doing the right thing - February 28, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 27, 2012
Beware the wrath of the Enraged Naked Fat Woman...consider yourself warned - February 27, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Sounds like someone has a Google (and a religious bigotry) problem - February 27, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Leading the excited multitudes toward freedom...or not - February 27, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 26, 2012
Christianity: The official religion of the USA!! USA!! USA!! - February 26, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 26, 2012
My homage to those of you who will be watching the Oscars tonight - February 26, 2012
Don Cherry: This is what happens when haberdashery goes horribly wrong - February 25, 2012
Today's IOKIYAR moment: Voter fraud...It's OK if you're a Republican - February 25, 2012
Memo to Rep. John Sullivan (R-OK): Civility- yer doon it rong - February 25, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 25, 2012
Ron Paul 2012: What "small government" is really about - February 24, 2012
The rich really are different...and so are their problems - February 24, 2012
The GOP war against women: Protecting sperm receptacles from themselves - February 24, 2012
Nice idea...but I still prefer my helmets to be tinfoil - February 24, 2012
Our stupid republic: 16 things that really shouldn't part of our public dialogue - February 24, 2012
Well, there goes my birthday present.... - February 24, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 23, 2012
I'm guessing this is the street Bob McDonnell's office is located on - February 23, 2012
I really have to ask what planet you spend most of your time on - February 23, 2012
Hey, if I was flying to Houston, I'd need a cigarette, too - February 23, 2012
Bob McDonnell 2012: Not just VP, but Chief Executioner for the American Taliban - February 23, 2012
You want to be known as reliably Conservative and anti-gay? Don't be like Mike. - February 23, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 22, 2012
No, thanks; if I need an investment plan I'll play the lottery - February 22, 2012
A WWJD Public Service: A portrait of RIck Santorum composed entirely of gay porn - February 22, 2012
Children don't hate naturally; they're taught to hate by adults - February 22, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because Godwin's Law doesn't apply to Social Conservatives - February 21, 2012
You know the Linsanity has gone way too far when...well, I'll bet Mom and Dad are SO proud - February 21, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 21, 2012
America: Where democracy is alive and well...except in Michigan - February 21, 2012
Greg Oden: $20.8 million for two bad knees? I'd do it for half that. - February 20, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 20, 2012
GOP 2012: For a government so small it can fit in a woman's vagina - February 20, 2012
How McDonald's hamburgers begin life - February 20, 2012
Better to be thought a bigot than to be Pat Buchanan and end up at Fox Noise Channel - February 20, 2012
The Art of Manliness: Why I carry a handkerchief - February 19, 2012
"Gay Republican" (n.): An inexplicable exercise in self-loathing and self-oppression - February 19, 2012
Today's nominee for Racist Headline of the Year - February 19, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because Catholicism can be used when convenient and ignored otherwise - February 19, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because he'll be the President of ALL (White, Socially Conservative, and Christian) Americans - February 19, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 18, 2012
First, they wanted to feed poor children...then they forced one-world government on us - February 18, 2012
GOP 2012: Because hypocrisy in the service of lust for power is no vice...or is it?? - February 18, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 17, 2012
Casual Sex Friday: Someone's a wee bit too concerned with other people's sex lives - February 17, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 17, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Because Bayer aspirin really is a wonderful and inexpensive contraceptive - February 17, 2012
Better to be thought an intolerant fool than to be Eric Bolling and...oh, never mind.... - February 16, 2012
"Where's the promise, from sea to shining sea?" - February 16, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: If God wanted you to have human rights, you'd have been born Republican - February 16, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 15, 2012
Today In Naked Teenage Cowgirl/Texas Police Chase News - February 15, 2012
If it's all and only about the individual, why do we even have a government? - February 15, 2012
A good reason to listen to your English teacher - February 15, 2012
Orrin Hatch: Not intended to be a factual Conservative - February 15, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 14, 2012
Happy Valentine's Day: Shouldn't marriage equality be accepted as a basic human right? - February 14, 2012
Better to be thought a fool and a bigot than to be James Lafferty and remove any lingering doubt - February 14, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 13, 2012
Today's edition of WWJD is brought to you by the folks who made Vulture Capitalism a household word - February 13, 2012
If you think real oppression exists in America, I'd suggest you hop a flight to Beijing - February 13, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 13, 2012
You can keep your green eggs and ham.... - February 13, 2012
Today's "WTF??" moment": And Republicans eat their young. What's your point? - February 12, 2012
Rick Santorum 2012: Who needs laws? We have Leviticus!! - February 12, 2012
GOP 2012: It's so much easier when you break things down scientifically - February 12, 2012
Today's editions of the Hyper-religious Follies - February 11, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: When all else fails, blame the victim - February 11, 2012
Lie, damned lies, and theocracy - February 11, 2012
When you work in a cube farm, you can't be surprised when you're treated like livestock - February 11, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 10, 2012
Ladies and gentleman, welcome to [insert name of your penis here] Stadium!! - February 10, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Because breast cancer is a business...and business is GOOD - February 10, 2012
I did my master's thesis on "anus-mounted fireworks"...and lived to tell about it - February 10, 2012
You know you're a Republican when...you take an article from the Onion as factual and true - February 10, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 10, 2012
We Americans have a funny way of determining who qualifies as a hero and role model - February 9, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Time to hop aboard the Schadenfreude Express - February 9, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 9, 2012
This is what would happen if Rupert Murdoch bought the History Channel - February 9, 2012
Lies, damned lies, Pete Hoekstra, and Chinese straw men - February 9, 2012
If you see a political agenda in Clint Eastwood's "Halftime in America", you need to dial it back - February 8, 2012
Better to be thought despicable than to be...oh, never mind.... - February 8, 2012
Today's dispatch from the attic - February 8, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: This is what happens when you take your eye off the ball - February 8, 2012
"Tom Coburn" isn't an anagram for "hypocrisy," but it might as well be - February 7, 2012
When you rattle cages, you just might get a response - February 7, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Too little Komen sense, too little moral courage - February 6, 2012
Memo to Portland Parking Enforcement: Don't you have better things to do with your time? - February 6, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Too little Komen sense, too much...WTF??? - February 6, 2012
No Discernible Brainwave Activity: The chicken nuggets edition - February 5, 2012
Dear Conservatives & Teabaggers: Happy #socialistsunday...er, Super Bowl Sunday - February 5, 2012
"Conservative devotion to truth"...and other oxymorons - February 5, 2012
And while we're at it, let's make Super Bowl Sunday a holiday for White Folks - February 5, 2012
Today's editions of the Hyper-religious Follies - February 4, 2012
Sometimes, the penis jokes are just WAY too easy.... - February 4, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Too little Komen sense, too much politics - February 4, 2012
America: The best democracy and tax policy money can corrupt...er, buy - February 4, 2012
Some random and probably pretty pointless observations about the human condition - February 3, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Victory may be sweet, but it doesn't wash away the bitter taste - February 3, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Sow the wind, reap the whirlwind - February 3, 2012
Damn...and I wanted to use this name for my band.... - February 3, 2012
Yeah, it's SO much more fun being the oppressor than the oppressed, eh? - February 2, 2012
Newt Gingrich 2012: Because no Republican caresses...uh, cares for women like Newt - February 2, 2012
Susan G. Komen for the Cure: Today's example of moral midgets caving to the Far Right - February 2, 2012
Today's "WTF??" moment": How to tell that you have WAY too much time on your hands - February 2, 2012
Now that Oklahoma's banned Sharia, aborted fetuses in food seems the next logical target - February 2, 2012
A novel way to demonstrate that women aren't merely sperm receptacles and the property of men - February 1, 2012
Mitt & Newt's America: Not like the America the rest of us live in - February 1, 2012
I'd like to dedicate this next song to Sam Brownback.... - February 1, 2012
In Sam Brownback's uber-Jesus-y Kansas, constitutionality is optional - February 1, 2012
There's ignorant. There's offensive. Then there's Allen West opening his mouth. - February 1, 2012
Republican debates: Now with 45% more crazy!! - January 31, 2012
To the moon, Newt!! (apologies to Ralph Kramden) - January 31, 2012
Coffee, tea, or donkey semen? - January 31, 2012
Better to be thought a fool than to be than to be Reince Priebus and remove any lingering doubt - January 31, 2012
Unclear on the whole "charity" concept, are we?? - January 30, 2012
Low IQ, Conservatism, and prejudice: Here comes the science.... - January 30, 2012
Mittbucks: Like you need to feel worse about your miserable, pointless existence - January 30, 2012
When niche marketing goes off the rails.... - January 30, 2012
Newt Gingrich 2012: Because Christians really ARE an oppressed majority - January 30, 2012
You know words have no meaning when.... - January 29, 2012
Who Would Jesus Hate? Just ask Patrick Wooden. - January 29, 2012
Hmm...something tells me that you're withholding important information - January 28, 2012
A dispatch from the Dept. of the Occasional Reality Check - January 28, 2012
Same-sex marriage: Time to do the right thing for the right reasons - January 28, 2012
This is why I had all my children vicariously - January 28, 2012
You have to know the Apocalypse is nigh when this is the best Hollywood can do - January 27, 2012
This is why I get all my toys at Home Depot - January 27, 2012
Yeah, but I'll bet Butterball's still trying to sell Muslim turkeys - January 26, 2012
SOTU: Inspiration...or just another opportunity for the nattering nabobs of negativity?? - January 26, 2012
It's always good to have standards...especially when it comes to used underwear - January 25, 2012
Gabrielle Giffords: A profile in courage we can all take inspiration from - January 24, 2012
I love traveling; it's the TSA I can't stand - January 24, 2012
When government begins to talk sense, you can bet Republicans will soon muddy the waters - January 24, 2012
Today's example of the worst of humanity - January 24, 2012
Don't ask...don't tell...don't worry - January 24, 2012
Mitt Romney 2012: Because he was for it before he was against it - January 23, 2012
Today's poetry lesson - January 23, 2012
Joe Paterno's legacy: Not what you'd think it could be - January 23, 2012
So you're looking for work? This probably isn't how you want to go about it. - January 23, 2012
Recession: A method for ensuring the servant class know their place - January 22, 2012
My problem with religion: A question with more than one answer - January 22, 2012
Memo to Social Conservatives: In American, Christians can't be an oppressed majority - January 21, 2012
Purity Bear: the more godly and moral (not to mention creepy) brother of Pedobear - January 21, 2012
Patriotism: It's more than just bleating about how much you love the troops - January 20, 2012
A trip through my referrer log: Sometimes the jokes write themselves - January 20, 2012
Newt Gingrich 2012: Because hypocrisy and sanctimoniousness come naturally - January 20, 2012
Working towards a better tomorrow...tomorrow (and maybe not even then) - January 19, 2012
A reminder of just how far we have to go...or, Great Moments in Hate 2012 - January 19, 2012
In Soviet Russia, bad food finds you - January 18, 2012
The Internet we take for granted is under siege from corporate interests - January 18, 2012
If Social Conservatives want to be relevant, meeting in Brenham, TX, isn't a great way to start - January 18, 2012
A WWJD Public Service: Now you can create your very own racist Ron Paul newsletter!! - January 17, 2012
Remember, it's not a war crime when Americans do it - January 17, 2012
Nurses: Angels of mercy...or evil minions of Satan?? - January 17, 2012
My next pet will be capable of crushing humans - January 16, 2012
The Best New Thing In The World: This makes me proud to be an American - January 16, 2012
Memo to Packers fan: No, I'm really NOT feeling your pain ;-) - January 15, 2012
If you believe that corporations are people, then Mitt Romney is a serial killer - January 15, 2012
First they came for the Bud Light, but I said nothing.... - January 15, 2012
Praise the Lord...and grab some Kleenex and hand sanitizer - January 14, 2012
This just in: Marines piss on Taliban...and Americans lose sight of the real outrage - January 14, 2012
Dogs Against Romney: Because you CAN judge a candidate by how he treats his dog, #2 - January 14, 2012
My next career move - January 14, 2012
Today on "Great Musical Moments in Pedophilia" - January 13, 2012
Happy Friday the 13th, circa 1940 - January 13, 2012
"And that hurts so bad...to leave my home because of one man that's got 15 homes." - January 13, 2012
Greetings from Portland, OR: The ennui capitol of the free world - January 12, 2012
Haiti: Two years and little change - January 12, 2012
Dogs Against Romney: Because you CAN judge a candidate by how he treats his dog - January 12, 2012
Memo to Pat Buchanan: Being White doesn't mean you're part of an oppressed majority - January 12, 2012
Nothing says "Super Bowl" like images of bloody aborted fetuses surrounded by religious icons - January 11, 2012
And now a word from our sponsor.... - January 11, 2012
So...can we assume that this isn't an album of children's music? - January 11, 2012
A few lessons I could (still) stand to learn - January 11, 2012
What if the Raptors and Wizards played...and no one cared? - January 10, 2012
Be careful when you pray for rain, Houston...and you wonder why I don't miss you.... - January 10, 2012
When shopping in Osaka, sometimes it's better not to ask questions - January 10, 2012
Ten questions to ask your favorite Conservative - January 10, 2012
When the dong makes an appearance, someone will surely pay - January 9, 2012
A good reason to be an atheist: it sounds like they have WAY more fun - January 9, 2012
Today in unfortunate, unintended homoerotic overtones - January 9, 2012
Drug testing the poor and unemployed: It's all fun and games until someone turns the tables - January 8, 2012
Today on "Spreading Santorum"...When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro - January 8, 2012
Choosing your religion: A WWJD Public Service - January 7, 2012
Andrew Breitbart hates me...Mama would be SO proud - January 7, 2012
Both sides throwing feces only means everyone ends up filthy and stinky - January 7, 2012
Happy Caturday: The philosophy edition - January 6, 2012
An open letter to Keith Olbermann - January 6, 2012
Today on "Spreading Santorum".... - January 5, 2012
Doctor, could I have Obama Derangement Syndrome? - January 5, 2012
A New Year's resolution I can get behind - January 5, 2012
Michele Bachmann: Back to baby farming? - January 4, 2012
My New Year's resolution...if only someone hadn't beaten me to it - January 4, 2012
GOP 2012: Goose-stepping not optional - January 4, 2012
GOP 2012: Honestly, "mediocre" would be a serious upgrade - January 3, 2012
The GOP Presidential primary campaign: A Club of Liars, Demagogues and Ignoramuses - January 3, 2012
Today in Badvertising: Racist ad of the day - January 1, 2012
Woody Guthrie's New Year's Resolutions, 1942 - January 1, 2012
Rick-rolling...or, why a President's surname shouldn't be a euphemism for the remnants of a sexual act - January 1, 2012
Crosby's Molasses: the reason you're going to need therapy - December 31, 2011
I wonder how much 200 foreskins is worth when you factor in inflation? - December 31, 2011
Happy Caturday: Footwear edition - December 31, 2011
Man, is it becoming harder to be a patriot these days, or what?? - December 30, 2011
You have to know the Apocalypse is nigh when Swedes are smuggling butter into Norway - December 30, 2011
That's the great thing about high unemployment: workers are now disposable commodities - December 30, 2011
Sure, she's qualified for the job...but is she hot?? - December 29, 2011
Grief is the price we pay for love, #3 - December 29, 2011
Hey, we got lemons. We're making lemonade, knowhutimean?? - December 29, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment": If Shawn Kemp is your hero, you're going to LOVE this story.... - December 28, 2011
Grief is the price we pay for love, #2 - December 27, 2011
Grief is the price we pay for love - December 26, 2011
The most disturbing video of a naked Kim Jong-il waving a North Korean flag you'll see...probably forever - December 26, 2011
Better to be thought a moron than to be Jules Manson and...oh, never mind.... - December 25, 2011
Merry Christmas from the fam-i-lee!! (apologies to Robert Earl Keen) - December 25, 2011
Dear Jewish people: Thank you! Love, Chinese restaurant owners - December 25, 2011
A very Maury Christmas to WWJD readers all over the world - December 24, 2011
A last-minute gift guide for Republicans - December 24, 2011
Democracy in Wisconsin: What about the poor, impressionable children?? - December 24, 2011
Merry Freakin' Christmas.... - December 23, 2011
A WWJD public service for those of you struggling with last-minute Christmas shopping - December 23, 2011
Republican (n.): inept, corrupt, posturing ideologues wholly owned by the very wealthy - December 23, 2011
I wonder if they celebrate Christmas in Hell? - December 23, 2011
A Christmas tale designed to scar your children for life - December 22, 2011
Happy Winter Solstice to my fellow Seasonal Affective Disorder sufferers!! - December 22, 2011
Someday, this will no longer be seen as newsworthy - December 22, 2011
Today's dispatch from the front lines of the War on Christmas - December 22, 2011
You mean Christmas really ISN'T all about gimme, gimme, gimme?? - December 21, 2011
Because nothing says "Merry Christmas!" like superior firepower - December 21, 2011
Today on the State Funeral Channel.... - December 21, 2011
If you're wondering why your present is late this year.... - December 21, 2011
If you're wondering why I hate the Green Bay Packers, this should give you an idea - December 21, 2011
Merry Freakin' Christmas.... - December 20, 2011
Vaclav Havel: The leader Kim Jong-il could never have been - December 20, 2011
So freedom of speech doesn't apply to reflexive, meaningless gestures? - December 20, 2011
Newt Gingrich 2012: Because screwing and dishonesty come naturally - December 19, 2011
Sometimes I miss my goatee.... - December 19, 2011
Newt Gingrich: But he'd be such a nice Benevolent Dictator - December 19, 2011
Wealth redistribution: The Pope's for it; how 'bout the Catholic Church leads the way? - December 19, 2011
On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...reindeer that can't fly - December 19, 2011
If you believe in it, it's apostasy; if I believe in it, it's The One True Religion - December 18, 2011
Today's exercise in perspective: One's person's boring is another's well-deserved celebration - December 17, 2011
A shortcut to my neighborhood Starbucks - December 17, 2011
How is giving up coffee or French Fries supposed to hasten the end of abortion? - December 17, 2011
Having solved all other pressing problems, Fox News is reduced to making stuff up - December 17, 2011
Friends don't let friends use Internet Explorer - December 16, 2011
My new Twitter hero - December 16, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Incest- the game the entire family can play...at pep rallies - December 16, 2011
Moscow 1928 - December 15, 2011
Who knew one little kidney could accomplish so much? - December 15, 2011
Facebook's "Report Suicidal Content": Who says the Internet is a vast time-suck?? - December 15, 2011
Something not on my Christmas list: the 2012 Naked Archaeologist calendar - December 15, 2011
Somewhere warm and breezy, Jesus weeps into his Dos Equis.... - December 14, 2011
We inform, you...oh, never mind.... - December 14, 2011
Today's oxymoron: "Principled Tea Party Republican" - December 13, 2011
Real heroes don't wear cleats - December 13, 2011
Won't you help the poor, suffering Norwegian children?? - December 12, 2011
Memo to Lindsay Graham: Would it be too much too expect you to know what you're talking about? - December 12, 2011
Today's dose of 9.11-related perspective - December 12, 2011
And you wonder why I don't miss Texas.... - December 11, 2011
I'm either a bit late or way early for Caturday - December 11, 2011
If Gretchen Carlson says there's a War on Christmas...well, grab your pitchforks and crucifixes, y'all!! - December 11, 2011
No, it's not fair, but Republicans can thank Kenneth Starr - December 10, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Korea to US- "9/11?? Fuhgeddaboudit!!!" - December 10, 2011
Today in sports.... - December 9, 2011
One person's "crazy" is another's "eccentric" is another's "diabolically evil" - December 9, 2011
Rick Perry 2012: If You Ain't Got Jesus, You Ain't [expletive deleted] - December 8, 2011
Yet another place you can find me.... - December 8, 2011
The GOP 2012: Being your own worst enemy means pulling the trigger as you stare down the barrel - December 8, 2011
So...you want to buy yourself an election? - December 7, 2011
It's the only system we have, so get over your whiny selves...like Adam Carolla did, right? - December 6, 2011
A little light housekeeping.... - December 5, 2011
This just in: The NHL is now scheduling games in Hell - December 5, 2011
In the greatest and most powerful nation in the world, how is it that "hunger" can be part of our vocabulary? - December 5, 2011
Mama said I needed to eat more vegetables - December 4, 2011
It's called "Separation of Church and State" for a reason - December 4, 2011
Herman Cain: When performance art becomes theater of the absurd - December 4, 2011
When I become a benevolent dictator, my propaganda posters will look a lot like this - December 3, 2011
And this, kids, is why professional athletes aren't role models - December 2, 2011
Lies, damned lies, and virtually anything Newt Gingrich says - December 2, 2011
A Liberal guide to winning the debate on same-sex marriage - December 2, 2011
"We begin bombing Edinburgh in five minutes...." - December 1, 2011
"What planet do you spend most of your time on?" - November 30, 2011
Katherine Heigl on behalf of the Foundation for Neutering Men - November 30, 2011
This is why I don't eat tofu: It's called a food chain for a reason, people - November 30, 2011
Herman Cain: If you live in a gas tank, you'd best know where the matches are, knowhutimean? - November 30, 2011
They got the gold mine, and we got the...oh, never mind.... - November 29, 2011
Freedom of speech 1, Crybaby Conservatives 0 (and it wasn't even that close) - November 29, 2011
We now have confirmation of the one thing Congressional Republicans do very well: nothing - November 29, 2011
Love is blind...and occasionally sticky - November 28, 2011
'Tis the reason for the season - November 28, 2011
The real news story is that someone actually wants to live in Indiana - November 28, 2011
Free speech...not just convenient or Conservative speech - November 27, 2011
Fox News Channel makes you stupid: It wouldn't hurt if it wasn't true - November 27, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: You have to know you're in Portland when.... - November 27, 2011
The sad reality of your time management skills - November 26, 2011
The new and improved 1st Amendment: Guaranteed freedom of (Conservative) speech - November 26, 2011
Democracy can be messy...especially if you're an oligarch worried about your life of privilege - November 26, 2011
1st Amendment rights: available only to those who will be spending money on Black Friday - November 25, 2011
Stand back; Hell is about to freeze over.... - November 25, 2011
So...what were you before 1955?? - November 25, 2011
There's no wrong way to do the right thing - November 24, 2011
Happy Spanksgiving! - November 24, 2011
As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.... - November 23, 2011
Better to be thought a fool than to hit "ENTER" and remove any lingering doubt - November 23, 2011
(Not exactly) From the IKEA Christmas catalog.... - November 23, 2011
Enough with Presidential lip service; how about taking some concrete action? - November 22, 2011
Newt Gingrich: Who knew the "Flavor of the Month" could be so foul and unpalatable? - November 22, 2011
When you're poll numbers rank up there with athlete's foot and pizza farts, it's time to go - November 21, 2011
Always wash cats in cold water with like colors. Line dry. Do not iron. - November 21, 2011
Just another cold, damp, grey day in (something resembling) Paradise - November 21, 2011
Protecting and serving whom?? - November 21, 2011
Paging Orval Faubus...or, Can you get to Kent State from here? - November 20, 2011
Arguing on the Internet: ALWAYS a guaranteed good time...just not here - November 20, 2011
"Newt Gingrich" (n.): Grifter, hypocrite, egomaniac with messiah complex - November 19, 2011
Today's coffee-spew moment: refilling your medication might be a good idea - November 19, 2011
It's easy to control reproductive rights when it's not your body being controlled - November 19, 2011
On the road to democracy in Wisconsin: Does this ass make my car look big? - November 19, 2011
Memo to Dennis Miller: Have you forgotten that Christians can be terrorists? - November 18, 2011
America: Land of the brave, home of those scared of anyone and anything different - November 18, 2011
You can't change the past, you can't know the future, but today.... - November 17, 2011
Time to announce the MVP of Occupy Wall Street: Mayor Michael Bloomberg - November 17, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Time to be honest about the control the oligarchy has over us - November 17, 2011
The latest communiques from my Nigerian relatives - November 16, 2011
The times, they are a changin'.... - November 16, 2011
The GOP: The party of pain, punishment, misery, and death - November 16, 2011
Memo to Scott Walker: Time to learn that karma can be a real...well, it rhymes with "rich" - November 15, 2011
And today's dirty little secret is.... - November 15, 2011
You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here - November 15, 2011
What if a basketball season was cancelled and no one noticed (or cared)? - November 15, 2011
Congress: a place where the rules you and I are bound by don't necessarily apply - November 15, 2011
Our business is war...and business is very, VERY good - November 14, 2011
If we have exactly the quality of leadership we deserve, we're completely hosed - November 14, 2011
One man's corruption and venality is another's business deal - November 14, 2011
Greetings from the dawn of the Age of the Servant Economy - November 13, 2011
When the truth is not your friend...well, there's always the Big Lie - November 13, 2011
If this is what's to be done in Jesus' name, then I'm a proud non-Christian - November 12, 2011
Today's example of (not exactly) Conservative Christian tolerance - November 12, 2011
You don't have to be huge; you just have to be willing to use your voice - November 12, 2011
Happy Caturday: On today's episode of "The Purring Dead".... - November 11, 2011
The Portland version of an ultimatum - November 11, 2011
Memo to Republicans: Stay classy, y'all! - November 11, 2011
Balancing the budget: So easy a Caveman could do it - November 10, 2011
Joe Paterno: The journey from football coaching god to pariah in the glare of a news cycle - November 10, 2011
Lies, damned lies, and Conservatives learning lessons - November 10, 2011
Man, I had NO idea Satan was on the ballot in Mississippi - November 9, 2011
Time for a little light housekeeping - November 9, 2011
A good reason to check your kid's homework - November 9, 2011
Big Tobacco 1, Public Health 0 - November 9, 2011
Football vs. edumication: A case of backasswards priorities - November 9, 2011
Free speech and assembly: a Constitutionally-guaranteed right...unless you're a hippie in Oakland - November 8, 2011
It's Election Day: Vote early and often - November 8, 2011
There's no wrong way to do the right thing, but there's certainly an inefficient way - November 8, 2011
Being a Republican means being able to give free reign to your hatred and prejudice - November 8, 2011
Happy Movember!! - November 7, 2011
So...this is what God told Michele Bachmann to do? - November 7, 2011
And now for something completely different.... - November 7, 2011
Now what? We have a movement, we have history and momentum on our side. Where do we go now? - November 7, 2011
A message for Erick Erickson: Smug self-superiority only makes you look like a dick - November 6, 2011
Peace on Earth and Goodwill towards Man...especially if you're hungry - November 6, 2011
A very good reason to be a Mac - November 5, 2011
Happy Caturday: Schrödinger's Cat edition - November 5, 2011
Happy Bank Transfer Day: Money talks; B.S. walks - November 5, 2011
If the Family Research Council is all about "family", then I'm the Queen of England - November 5, 2011
Celebrate Movember; unleash your inner porn star for a good cause! - November 4, 2011
Are you doing everything you can to protect your children from...hot dog addiction?? - November 4, 2011
Some of us love and cherish our children. Some of us just have an odd and violent way of showing it.... - November 4, 2011
What if we created a better world for no real reason?? - November 4, 2011
Religion should not be a smokescreen for child abuse and murder - November 4, 2011
How about we place the blame where it belongs? - November 3, 2011
The WWJD Word of the Day: "Hypocrisy" - November 3, 2011
Suddenly, Christmas in July doesn't seem so far-fetched - November 3, 2011
We have a wiener.... - November 2, 2011
The movement is spreading - November 2, 2011
I would never belong to a club that would have me as member...which is why I'll never run for office - November 2, 2011
This just in: Steve Jobs is still dead...but his grip on reality lives on - November 2, 2011
Communication: always a good thing in relationships - November 1, 2011
Kim Kardashian: proof that gay marriage is a dire threat to the institution of marriage - November 1, 2011
No more room in Hell: When the rich fight back, you know they're scared - November 1, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: At first I thought it was stoopid...then I realized it was Texas - October 31, 2011
DO people change? And do Conservatives deserve absolution more than Liberals? - October 31, 2011
Another WWJD public service: How to understand Republican-speak - October 30, 2011
Today's dispatch from the War on Halloween - October 29, 2011
They who have the gold gets to make the rules...to their advantage, of course - October 29, 2011
Social Conservatives declare war on women: Film at 11 - October 28, 2011
Every change begins with a single voice. Now we have thousands. Change is good. - October 28, 2011
When chemistry and entrepreneurship meet...these aren't the results you'd be wanting - October 28, 2011
A few random thoughts on a Friday morning - October 27, 2011
If God had meant for you to have health insurance, you'd have been born rich - October 27, 2011
The shock, I suppose, is that some cheeseheads are fit enough to ride bikes - October 27, 2011
Goldman Sachs: Making lemonade from lemons is easier when you've leveraged the lemons - October 26, 2011
In case you were wondering.... - October 26, 2011
Compassionate Conservatism is...well, neither - October 26, 2011
My life. In six words. Ugh. - October 26, 2011
If there's a God, may we never, EVER hear the phrase "Get in Tim Tebow's pants" again - October 26, 2011
Lindsay Lohan saves America from itself - October 25, 2011
Today in "People Unclear On The Concept": Wrong Rangers, dude.... - October 25, 2011
Be safe. Be smart. Be like Mario. Or not. - October 25, 2011
When a Republican President does it, it's prudent leadership. When a Democratic President does it, it's treason. - October 25, 2011
Mission (not exactly) Accomplished - October 24, 2011
Antiques aren't what they used to be - October 24, 2011
Remember, y'all...it ain't football unless they're wearing lace panties and push-up bras - October 24, 2011
Thank you for your service...now don't let the door hit you in the butt on your way out - October 24, 2011
So...how's that "small government" thingie workin' out fer ya?? - October 23, 2011
The economy's in the toilet. So what? Remember, people...Job One is making sure this President fails. - October 23, 2011
How is it that we can wage endless wars abroad, but we can't feed Americans here at home? - October 22, 2011
A tyrant's dead. So what? Remember, people...Job One is making sure this President fails. - October 22, 2011
Consume. Be silent. Acquiesce. Vote Republican. It's easier than thinking. - October 22, 2011
Better to be thought an unabashed fool and bigot than to be Allen West and...oh, never mind.... - October 22, 2011
Welcome to what looks a lot like the death of free speech - October 21, 2011
Everything you need to know about Herman Cain...but were afraid to ask (#2) - October 21, 2011
"Democracy": Such a quaint, outdated, pie-in-the-sky Liberal concept - October 21, 2011
When traffic signs attack.... - October 20, 2011
Tea Party: brave American patriots. Occupy Wall Street: unwashed America-hating hippie freaks - October 20, 2011
This just in: Barack Obama to blame for global climate change. And bunions. - October 19, 2011
And you wonder why I won't eat at McDonald's?? - October 19, 2011
Everything you need to know about Herman Cain...but were afraid to ask - October 19, 2011
First they came for my ketchup, and I said nothing, for I had no french fries - October 18, 2011
I tried to call Lloyd Blankfein to cheer him up, but.... - October 18, 2011
ADD: A cause close to my heart - October 18, 2011
This just in: Compassionate Conservatism is neither - October 17, 2011
Mines bigger than yours...no, really; Mine. Is. Bigger. Than. Yours. - October 17, 2011
You know global climate change is serious when it impacts our caffeine delivery system - October 17, 2011
Better to be thought a fool and a dick than to be than to be Eric Bolling and remove all lingering doubt - October 16, 2011
Time to put your money where your beliefs are - October 15, 2011
Caturday: Wisteria Lane edition - October 15, 2011
If we can fight two wars and subsidize the rich, we can care for one another - October 15, 2011
Happy Caturday: Winter is coming - October 14, 2011
You know, this used to be a family show.... - October 14, 2011
(Understandably) Rejected Ben & Jerry's flavors - October 13, 2011
Because nothing says we're mediocre and desperate like.... - October 13, 2011
Two Norwegian female athletes kissing a...well, use your imagination.... - October 13, 2011
Better to be thought a dick than to be Erick Erickson and...oh, never mind.... - October 12, 2011
In case y'all hadn't had enough of me already.... - October 12, 2011
Won't you help support America's job creators? - October 12, 2011
Memo to the Tea Party: Can we PLEASE worry about things that actually matter? - October 12, 2011
Do we really want a world that Ayn Rand would approve of? - October 12, 2011
And this is why I'm not a Kid Rock fan - October 11, 2011
A sign of the times: Texting romance, wi-fi rendezvous - October 11, 2011
If we want to stay on top, ensuring universal broadband access would seem a good place to start - October 11, 2011
Today's communique from the "They're Poor 'Cuz They Wanna Be" Department - October 10, 2011
Today's communique from the People's Judean Front For Effective and Accurate Punctuation - October 10, 2011
When women are considered property, why should we protect them? Uh...because they're not property? - October 10, 2011
Because I'm ALL about healthy breasts.... - October 10, 2011
Things to do in Denver when you've been denied your right to vote - October 10, 2011
So, what's next? Competitive wife-beating?? - October 9, 2011
I don't remember life before wireless...but it must have been horrible and primitive - October 8, 2011
One person's a crackpot. Thousands can reasonably be called a movement. - October 8, 2011
Happy Caturday: Do you know what your cat is smoking? - October 7, 2011
If we don't stand up and scream "ENOUGH!", how will anyone know when we've had enough? - October 7, 2011
A graphic explanation of what's wrong with America - October 6, 2011
Many want to change the world- Steve Jobs actually did - October 6, 2011
Somebody's getting an upgrade - October 6, 2011
Today's GOP: A compassion-free environment - October 6, 2011
If loving bacon is wrong.... - October 5, 2011
Hoping for a bang, Apple comes through with what feels like a whimper - October 5, 2011
We can do better than the cheaper insults used against us...right?? - October 4, 2011
Much ado about nothing...which of course means it's the worse sort of racism imaginable - October 4, 2011
Historically speaking, if you're White, you're an illegal immigrant - October 4, 2011
The real reason America is in such a mess is...wait for it...school lunch fraud - October 4, 2011
Some Americans really are more equal than others...and they'd like to keep it that way - October 3, 2011
If I don't toot my own horn, will it even make a sound? - October 3, 2011
When the Neanderthals can't defeat your argument, sexism and smug arrogance are ALWAYS good options - October 3, 2011
When Liberals do it, it's fomenting revolution. When Conservatives do it, it's getting back to basics - October 2, 2011
Run, rabbit, run!...the story of how Jack tried to recapture his youth...or die trying - October 1, 2011
Child abuse: religious dogma is not superior to the health and well-being of a child - September 30, 2011
When we all come together, sometimes amazing things can happen - September 30, 2011
Only when Americans are free of compassion and selflessness will American truly be free...or not - September 30, 2011
Can you spare some change? If we don't support the oligarchy, who will?? - September 30, 2011
Oh noes!!! Will Teh Gayz come for me, too?? - September 29, 2011
Southwest's business model: Discrimination isn't exactly a recipe for success - September 29, 2011
Greetings from the set of "Idiocracy" - September 27, 2011
If it's class warfare, we really should be fighting back - September 27, 2011
A musical interlude to sooth the chattering masses - September 26, 2011
If you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'.... - September 26, 2011
Today in stupid boycotts: Charles Bukowski spins furiously in his grave - September 26, 2011
When implacable hatred supplants reason and evidence, you're an NRA member - September 25, 2011
"Spanky McFarland Could Be Running, And If He Could Beat Obama I'd Vote For Him" - September 24, 2011
When you're reduced to complaining about ice cream, can you be called anything but pathetic? - September 24, 2011
Today's autobiographical anatomy lesson - September 23, 2011
A few random thoughts on a Friday morning - September 23, 2011
If you had deluded yourself into thinking that Republicans actually care about America.... - September 23, 2011
From the Department of Evidently I Was Born Yesterday.... - September 22, 2011
The death penalty: a conversation we really need to have - September 22, 2011
Ignorance is dangerous. Arrogance isn't cool. So why do Republicans embrace both? - September 21, 2011
The sad thing is that we need to celebrate a class of people being granted equal rights - September 20, 2011
In case anyone's interested.... - September 20, 2011
Memo to Fred Phelps: Foo you.... ;-) - September 19, 2011
It's good to know that standards exist - September 18, 2011
Science is empirical. Right-wing propaganda can't define "empirical." - September 16, 2011
If I'm overexposed, I must be doing something right - September 16, 2011
Sir Jack valiantly defends the realm from the threat of the R.O.U.S. - September 16, 2011
When a lie become indistinguishable from the truth, you must be a Republican - September 15, 2011
A question crying out to be asked...and answered - September 15, 2011
The modern-day equivalent of the Know-Nothing Party - September 14, 2011
Why does Eric Cantor hate America? - September 14, 2011
WWJD relationship tip #371: You know it's serious when.... - September 14, 2011
Proof that Conservatives truly care for freedom of (only what agrees with their) speech - September 13, 2011
Sometimes when you ask a question, you get answers you'd never expect - September 13, 2011
A chance to recognize what we've done to ourselves...and make a difference - September 13, 2011
Hey, if you want respect, honor, and selflessness, go to an NFL game - September 12, 2011
What do humans, rum, and dolphin sex have in common? I have no idea, either.... - September 12, 2011
On one side, cowardice and fear. On the other, lies and demagoguery. Good luck with that choice. - September 11, 2011
Today I defer to those who have something to say, because I've got nothing - September 10, 2011
Evidently, our sense of tragedy (and our grip on reality) is out of whack - September 10, 2011
And now for something completely different.... - September 10, 2011
Those who don't know history are condemned to...oh, never mind.... - September 9, 2011
A musical plea for some collective soul-searching - September 9, 2011
Faster, Pussycat!! Faster!! KILL!! KILL!! - September 8, 2011
Today's Facepalm Award winner: Ashley McDowell - September 8, 2011
This is why the dinosaurs died: The Postal Service's very public death throes - September 7, 2011
Every journey begins with a single (baby) step - September 7, 2011
Today, the Senate...tomorrow, Teh Gayz achieve total world domination - September 7, 2011
A recurring (and somewhat irregular) homage to my hometown - September 6, 2011
Every action has an equal and opposite (occasionally unfortunate) reaction. - September 6, 2011
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good people to do nothing - September 5, 2011
Being a Republican means never having to say your sorry...or be held accountable for war crimes - September 5, 2011
A disappointing soliticitation from a disappointing President - September 5, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - September 3, 2011
Ten years later...and hopefully a little bit wiser - September 3, 2011
How can we prevail? How about by screaming and engaging in personal insults? Yeah, that's the ticket. - September 3, 2011
I can't predict the future, but if it involves a villa in Tuscany...well, that would be a good thing. - September 2, 2011
A recurring (and somewhat irregular) homage to my hometown - September 2, 2011
Remember when antitrust laws actually used to be enforced? I don't, either. - September 2, 2011
In a perfect world, we'd be celebrating this - September 1, 2011
It doesn't suck to be Jack...but it ain't always easy - September 1, 2011
We LOVE a man in a uniform: Full cavity search edition - August 31, 2011
Who knew that you could save your way out of a Depression? - August 31, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 30, 2011
Come for the graphic sex...stay for the animal cruelty - August 30, 2011
It's the NFL, which means "Not For Long" if you proselytize instead of perform - August 29, 2011
Every journey begins with a single step...at least that's what the bumper sticker said - August 27, 2011
Today on "Going To Hell In A Handbasket": Sports is what we're choosing to fight over? - August 27, 2011
If movie posters were honest - August 26, 2011
A few tips on hurricane preparation for the uninitiated - August 26, 2011
It's always easier to blame the messenger than to hear the message - August 25, 2011
So size really doesn't matter? - August 25, 2011
Learning to roll with the punches...as well as the silliness and hypocrisy - August 24, 2011
There's a time and a place for this sort of thing, and it's called "College" - August 23, 2011
Go ahead...ask me how much I miss Houston ;-) - August 23, 2011
Mean-spirited, clueless, out of touch...and evidently built to stay that way - August 23, 2011
American Exceptionalism: A figment of our collective imagination? - August 22, 2011
(Not exactly) Downtown Portland on an August Monday morning.... - August 22, 2011
This just in: Gnomeo wounded defending Juliet's honor - August 21, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 20, 2011
Baseball will come to Portlandia when flying pigs violate Saudi airspace - August 19, 2011
Since when are soldiers considered expendable commodities? Oh, right...since the Bush wars.... - August 19, 2011
How is it that evil, crazy, and unbalanced all got seats at the table? - August 18, 2011
More adventures in (something resembling) Paradise - August 17, 2011
Mac OS X: cute kitten optional - August 17, 2011
Today on "Defending The Indefensible".... - August 16, 2011
Texas: Where "Social Contract" is a few short steps removed from "Socialism" - August 15, 2011
To you, they're garden gnomes; to me, they're the first, last, and only line of defense - August 13, 2011
I don't care how nicely you ask...I'm not getting naked in front of a camera - August 13, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 12, 2011
If England can do it, why can't we? - August 11, 2011
Who says sex isn't a weapon? - August 10, 2011
The two-minute hate: the game every patriotic, God-fearing American should know how to play - August 10, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 10, 2011
Today's signs that the Apocalypse may be upon us - August 9, 2011
If loving gnomes is wrong, I don't want to be right - August 9, 2011
Somewhere warm and breezy, Gordon Gecko snickers into his Dos Equis.... - August 8, 2011
Better to be thought a fool than to put up a billboard along I-5 and remove all doubt - August 7, 2011
You have to know the Apocalypse is nigh when.... - August 7, 2011
Hypocrisy: it's (not exactly) What Jesus Would Do - August 7, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 6, 2011
Happy Hypocritefest 2011!! Party responsibly; It's What Jesus Would Do - August 6, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 6, 2011
OK, so the Sieg Meowing was a bit off-putting - August 6, 2011
You've been warned.... - August 5, 2011
Greetings from Third World Amerika...where Social Darwinism is the new Social Contract - August 5, 2011
Reports of the death of irony were evidently premature - August 5, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - August 4, 2011
I suppose this is what happens when a leader refuses to lead - August 4, 2011
Everything I've learned about salvaging a relationship I didn't learn from this video - August 3, 2011
A lesson I could stand to learn (and remember) - August 3, 2011
It's the end of the world as we know it...and I'm pretty OK with the whole thing - August 3, 2011
Scenes from a wedding (Sun Mountain Lodge- Winthrop, WA) - August 2, 2011
Let's hope there's a reward at the end of the journey - August 1, 2011
Rome wasn't built in a day, but really bad beer doesn't even take that long - August 1, 2011
Another question I don't have an answer for - July 31, 2011
Jesus may love you...but everyone else thinks you're a complete dick - July 29, 2011
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - July 29, 2011
This actually just might be What Jesus Would Do - July 29, 2011
A question I have no answer for - July 28, 2011
Funny thing...I have the same rules when I'm playing golf.... - July 28, 2011
Today on "Pet Peeve Watch".... - July 27, 2011
New house rule...it'll save on laundry expenses - July 26, 2011
What you're about to see cannot be unseen - July 26, 2011
Another day in my world - July 26, 2011
Sinking to the level of those already lower than a snake's belly serves no useful purpose - July 26, 2011
(Not exactly) What's for breakfast - July 25, 2011
And I'm going to keep doing it 'til I get it right...like that's ever going to happen - July 24, 2011
An evening with Kenny Chesney- probably the best $25 I've ever spent - July 24, 2011
How long before they blame Obama for the Norwegian tragedy? - July 23, 2011
Today, on "Propaganda Watch".... - July 23, 2011
You are what you read - July 22, 2011
Sometimes, a little perspective is a very good thing - July 22, 2011
For everything, a season - July 21, 2011
No, it doesn't suck to be Jack these days - July 19, 2011
It was a very good day - July 19, 2011
Iran: Repressive, barbaric...and evidently built to stay that way - July 18, 2011
It's always darkest just before things REALLY suck - July 18, 2011
Yeah, I'm kinda whipped.... - July 17, 2011
You'd think I would have learned this quite some time ago.... - July 17, 2011
The GOP: Dragging America kicking and screaming back to the 1930s - July 16, 2011
So...gluttony is a competitive sport?? What's next, adultery?? - July 16, 2011
The edumication of Jack continues.... - July 15, 2011
American Democracy: dysfunctional, brain-dead...and evidently built to stay that way - July 15, 2011
On today's menu: hairballs - July 15, 2011
Random thoughts on what should be a beautiful summer Friday - July 15, 2011
A trip back into my tasteless archives - July 15, 2011
A trip to times gone by in the Wayback Machine - July 14, 2011
Secondhand smoke = child abuse. Any questions?? - July 14, 2011
So you want to aggravate a writer? It's easier thank you might think. - July 13, 2011
Better to be thought a moron than to be Ann Coulter and...oh, never mind.... - July 12, 2011
So...reassure me again that Republicans aren't deliberately trying to tank the economy.... - July 11, 2011
I may not have been correct, but I wasn't wrong - July 11, 2011
And you wonder why it ain't easy being me.... - July 10, 2011
Magical thinking, made-up science, and the war on drugs - July 10, 2011
It never gets easier.... - July 9, 2011
I can get them for half that price at Target - July 9, 2011
When women are considered property, this is about all you can expect - July 9, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Where's my saddle?? - July 8, 2011
A liquid trip back to Texas - July 8, 2011
A government of the oligarchs, by the oligarchs, and for the oligarchs - July 8, 2011
I've got the brawn. You've got the brains. Let's make lots of money. - July 7, 2011
Another day in Paradise (Oceanside, OR)...yet again ;-) - July 7, 2011
This is why I'm not a caterer. Attention to detail is NOT my strong suit. - July 7, 2011
When you think with the wrong head, this is about the best you can reasonably expect - July 6, 2011
Back in the saddle again.... - July 5, 2011
If this is the best we can do, then count me out - July 5, 2011
Coming soon to life closely resembling yours - July 5, 2011
It's National I Don't Give A Shit Month. Celebrate Responsibly. Or not. - July 4, 2011
Happy Independence Day! Celebrate responsibly. Or not. - July 4, 2011
Hike faster...I hear banjo music!! - July 3, 2011
You can't claim to be surprised when they do what they told you they'd do - July 2, 2011
The only thing on today's agenda - July 2, 2011
The journey to changing the world begins with a single step...but probably not this one - July 1, 2011
Just another day in Paradise...or in this case, Oceanside, OR - July 1, 2011
Maybe, possibly, hopefully...summer might be coming to Portland - July 1, 2011
Why would I ever want to belong to any club that would have me as a member? - June 30, 2011
"You ain't seen nothing like me yet...." - June 30, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: definitive proof that a sense of humor is not standard equipment - June 29, 2011
Epic disaster or total clusterf--k? Let us hope we choose wisely. - June 28, 2011
This could be the title of my autobiography - June 27, 2011
And this is why I don't do restaurant reviews - June 27, 2011
Making the best of a horrible situation. Or not. - June 26, 2011
If you were expecting me to be perfect, you're going to be waiting awhile - June 25, 2011
Just another brick in the wall - June 25, 2011
When you're not getting nearly enough attention, this is what you get - June 24, 2011
Is this REALLY the America we want? - June 24, 2011
In case you forgot, this is how babies are made - June 24, 2011
The reason I don't miss the '70s - June 23, 2011
Another dispatch from our our idiocracy - June 22, 2011
Hey...at least I'm #1 in something ;-) - June 22, 2011
Today is brought by the number "3.1415926536" and the word "forgiveness" - June 22, 2011
Happy It's National Use-Up-Your-Leftovers-in-a-Jell-O-Salad Week! Celebrate Responsibly! - June 22, 2011
Today in Rick Perry: A true Texas "WTF??" moment - June 22, 2011
Yesterday was a very good day to be Rufus - June 21, 2011
Life as it should be - June 21, 2011
Smoke, mirrors, and Rick Perry's prescient leadership - June 21, 2011
I can hardly wait for the instruction manual to arrive - June 20, 2011
It's good to be King ;-) - June 20, 2011
So, you're wondering why we can't take care of priorities here at home? - June 20, 2011
No, we have no problems...life just sucks a bit more than usual ;-) - June 19, 2011
Happy Father's Day from the crack staff at WWJD ;-) - June 19, 2011
Things I've learned along the way that y'all probably learned long before I did - June 18, 2011
Presented without comment...because none is really needed - June 18, 2011
No, this isn't an outtake from "Portlandia" - June 18, 2011
Stay thirsty, my friends - June 17, 2011
You know, it wasn't supposed to be this way...was it? - June 17, 2011
An open letter to hockey fans in Vancouver, BC - June 16, 2011
Finger-lickin' good.... - June 16, 2011
Another day on the road to I know not where - June 16, 2011
This is making me hungry all over again - June 15, 2011
Another fork in the road - June 14, 2011
Memo to Cleveland: Time to let it go, don'tchathink? - June 13, 2011
I've got a song; ain't got no melody.... - June 11, 2011
If you want faithful and devoted, look for four legs and a wet nose - June 10, 2011
Random reflections on the meaning of life on a beautiful, sunny Portland morning - June 8, 2011
What is this "heat wave" of which you speak?? - June 8, 2011
Perhaps it's time we considered limiting public office to women - June 8, 2011
Never take dating advice from a guy named "Woody" - June 7, 2011
Suddenly, the weiner jokes aren't so funny - June 6, 2011
I'm loyal, trustworthy, and I have a wet nose. Wait...I'm a basset hound?? - June 6, 2011
Take one of these and call me in the morning.... - June 4, 2011
A WWJD Public Service: How to discuss Anthony Weiner's penis with your children - June 4, 2011
OK...so there's still hope for me - June 3, 2011
Sometimes, you learn that the truth has been staring back at you all along - June 3, 2011
In a world of, by, and for Citizens United, this is what we've been reduced to - June 2, 2011
Here's the thing about religious extremism, intimidation, and murder: it works - June 1, 2011
Hatred and religious bigotry- yer doon it rong (Chapter 2) - May 31, 2011
No amount of super glue or Tennessee whiskey will fix this - May 28, 2011
Fate: Just a wide spot on the Road to Redemption - May 27, 2011
Heerz yer war kriminul...wee can haz EU now?? - May 26, 2011
If it's wrong when "they" do it, it's wrong when "we" do it - May 25, 2011
Delta Airlines: where "customer service" is an oxymoron - May 24, 2011
"How many more Gay People does God have to create...." - May 23, 2011
It seems the Motherland has lost it's freakin' mind - May 23, 2011
Because bacon makes EVERYTHING better - May 23, 2011
What happens in Vegas.... - May 21, 2011
An eye for an eye only leaves the whole world blind - May 20, 2011
It's Friday...and I'm having a very Takei day - May 20, 2011
Today's entry in the "The Next Texas State Sport" sweepstakes.... - May 19, 2011
I miss you even before you're gone - May 19, 2011
Of course, if the world ends this Saturday, zombies will be the least of our problems - May 18, 2011
Governor Goodhair for President? Oh, pleasepleasepleaseplease.... - May 17, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Her parents had a wicked sense of humor, no? - May 17, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Her parents had a wicked sense of humor, no? - May 17, 2011
Well, it's not like the Astros could be any worse...right?? - May 16, 2011
Justice delayed is justice in Syria - May 14, 2011
Next week, we'll learn about Osama's collection of blow-up sex dolls.... - May 14, 2011
At least make it worth my while.... - May 13, 2011
What's on my night stand these days - May 13, 2011
Not-so-thinly-veiled racism used to be fun. Now, it's like they're not even trying. - May 12, 2011
How to survive a zombie attack: Another WWJD public service - May 11, 2011
So what kind of America do we want to be? - May 11, 2011
The cover for my upcoming autobiography - May 10, 2011
An opportunity for chest-thumping, apropos of nothing - May 9, 2011
I, for one, welcome our avian overlords - May 9, 2011
Today's signs that the Apocalypse may well and truly be upon us - May 8, 2011
Increasing the volume does not meaning increasing the sanity - May 7, 2011
What Would Pete Seeger Do? - May 7, 2011
Perhaps you've forgotten who we are; how about we remind you? - May 6, 2011
Time for a (tasteful, understated) celebration - May 5, 2011
There's angry, there's apoplectic, there's foaming at the mouth, and there's whatever this is - May 5, 2011
Finally...a realistic grip on reality - May 4, 2011
I am a blogger...for I have no fact-checker - May 4, 2011
For one night, at least, a reason to celebrate - May 3, 2011
Sure, they SAY he's dead, but.... - May 2, 2011
An opportunity for some chest-thumping, but what's changed? - May 2, 2011
Time to do the hard work and lay off the easy targets - April 30, 2011
Time to draw a line in the sand, before Trump announces he owns the sand - April 29, 2011
It will be a great day when you have to fly to Bulgaria just to smoke a cigarette - April 28, 2011
Our economy circles the drain, and we're talking about...birth certificates? Really?? - April 28, 2011
Brandon, MS 1, Westboro Baptist Church 0 - April 27, 2011
Just in case any of y'all were wondering.... - April 27, 2011
It's the end of the world as we know it, and I'm feelin' pretty good - April 26, 2011
Another argument for how we're digging our graves with our teeth - April 24, 2011
And you wonder why Americans don't respect politicians? - April 23, 2011
Happy Caturday: It's Good To Be King - April 22, 2011
The Texas Diet: You are what you eat - April 22, 2011
Memo to Jon Kyl: Take your medicine and move on...or risk becoming a running joke - April 21, 2011
Hatred and religious bigotry- yer doon it rong - April 19, 2011
Anyone else see a quick and sensible way to solve our debt problem? - April 18, 2011
Of course, in the end it ain't nothin' but a number...right?? - April 18, 2011
Why make things any harder than you have to? - April 17, 2011
Too big to fail...and evidently too big to pay taxes - April 16, 2011
We have a wiener!! - April 16, 2011
Today's semi-regular list of lists - April 15, 2011
For that kind of money, I want the right to conduct summary executions - April 13, 2011
Yes, Virginia; there IS a Progressive alternative to Conservative madness - April 12, 2011
I'm not whining; I just happen to believe in truth in advertising - April 12, 2011
We just found the last person in the world who's never heard of the Internet - April 11, 2011
Another WWJD public service, in case you were wondering about that egg - April 10, 2011
Panem et circenses...Or, anyone care to explain this bit of creative financing to me? - April 9, 2011
All Hail The Kittehs!! - April 9, 2011
Isn't it about time we got real about our health care crisis? - April 9, 2011
This is why we're fat. Any questions? - April 8, 2011
Magical thinking + made-up numbers + unicorn hunting = Paul Ryan's budget - April 8, 2011
Doing the right thing a bit late...is still doing the right thing - April 7, 2011
So you say you want to make a difference.... - April 7, 2011
Sir? I think we just found the soft underbelly. - April 7, 2011
Prosperity...it's just around the corner - April 6, 2011
Thanks, but I have a real girlfriend I'm pretty happy with - April 6, 2011
When love is hate and hate is love - April 5, 2011
Lunch with Princess.... - April 5, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Hey, it's not like they killed hundreds or anything.... - April 5, 2011
Presented without comment...because I got nothin' - April 4, 2011
What Would Jesus Do? He'd order extra garlic and pepperoni. - April 3, 2011
Evidently, I'm in the wrong line of work - April 2, 2011
Sometimes, a picture really IS worth a thousand words...and then some - April 2, 2011
And now for something completely different.... - April 1, 2011
Is this REALLY what we need to be doing to advance our cause? - March 31, 2011
For Princess.... - March 31, 2011
And here's your moment of Zen.... - March 30, 2011
Just another night in (something closely resembling) Paradise - March 30, 2011
I may have to start eating cereal for breakfast again - March 29, 2011
"The horse of undeclared war has pretty much left the barn...." - March 28, 2011
Back to the future...so why does it look so much like 1931? - March 27, 2011
Sunday Food Porn: I see a parsnip. You might see something...different. - March 26, 2011
The working title for my autobiography.... - March 26, 2011
Canada establishes universal health care. 27 years later, the government collapses. Coincidence??
Comments (1) - March 24, 2011
Welcome to Wisconsin...check your rights at the border - March 24, 2011
Today's communique from the Ima Dick State Sanitorium - March 23, 2011
Those who can, teach...you smug, self-righteous pinhead ;-)
Comments (1) - March 23, 2011
What about the poor, innocent Buffalo wings?? - March 23, 2011
Today's communique from the Ima Dick State Sanitorium - March 22, 2011
Fighting to preserve life, liberty, and the $1 value menu - March 22, 2011
Live from the Ima Dick Memorial Coliseum.... - March 22, 2011
All we have is.... - March 21, 2011
Greetings from the set of "Idiocracy 2: My Brain Hurts"
Comments (1) - March 21, 2011
Welcome to National Hug Your Urologist Week - March 21, 2011
Evil, crazy, and built to stay that way - March 20, 2011
Has anyone seen the President I voted for?
Comments (1) - March 20, 2011
Today in indentured servitude and random silliness - March 19, 2011
Yearning for the return of a world that existed only on a Hollywood sound stage - March 19, 2011
Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the kitchen.... - March 19, 2011
It's Caturday, so relax and enjoy the rich, creamy goodness - March 18, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: You can't fix stupid (or, another day in Texas) - March 17, 2011
Headlines designed to make your head explode - March 16, 2011
Just in case you were wondering - March 16, 2011
Sometimes, human nature has a good side - March 16, 2011
You could be forgiven for thinking that things really, really suck when....
Comments (1) - March 15, 2011
Today's headlines for the heavily medicated - March 15, 2011
You can never be too careful around Chuck - March 14, 2011
No matter how much you repeat it, both sides are NOT equal - March 14, 2011
This is why we can't think outside the box - March 13, 2011
Does someone have to die before the NHL does the right thing?
Comments (1) - March 12, 2011
The very definition of tragedy - March 12, 2011
I've suddenly forgotten about all of my childhood problems.... - March 10, 2011
Time marches on, change is good...but it still leaves a hole
Comments (2) - March 10, 2011
Today's math lesson: it's ALL about the numbers - March 10, 2011
I'm just doing what I can to contribute - March 9, 2011
Sometimes I wish Jon Stewart would tell us what he REALLY thinks - March 8, 2011
This is why I'm not a sportswriter - March 8, 2011
Time to explore my career options.... - March 7, 2011
When it comes to racism, there's only one acceptable response - March 7, 2011
A few questions I'd really like answers to - March 6, 2011
'Cuz there ain't no crazy like Texas crazy
Comments (1) - March 5, 2011
Remember, kids; it's ALL about the grammar and punctuation - March 5, 2011
Why I'll never be confused with "Dear Abby" - March 5, 2011
Quick, easy, time-tested ways to impress the ladies - March 5, 2011
You know someone thinks you're a real dick when.... - March 3, 2011
It wouldn't hurt if America actually had a coherent health care system - March 3, 2011
Sometimes a picture really IS worth a thousand words
Comments (1) - March 2, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moments: unfathomable...and built to stay that way - March 1, 2011
The Texas State Bird - March 1, 2011
A few possible career moves....
Comments (2) - February 28, 2011
This is what we get when the menu matches my mood - February 28, 2011
Happy Monday.... - February 27, 2011
So, how would you like to be told that your job is now 2700 miles away?
Comments (1) - February 25, 2011
Desperate times call for desperate measures, Part Deux - February 25, 2011
America gets it up again - February 24, 2011
Desperate times call for desperate measures
Comments (3) - February 23, 2011
Americans don't know a bargain when they see it - February 22, 2011
Is this who we want to be? - February 21, 2011
The National Sadomasochism Society is on the ninth floor - February 21, 2011
And then they asked me for my blood type.... - February 20, 2011
An open letter to the President...for what it's worth, #2
Comments (1) - February 20, 2011
The #1 reason I'm glad I don't live in Southern California
Comments (1) - February 19, 2011
Go to Squirrel Belch and hang a right. You can't miss it.... - February 19, 2011
'The American Dream Is For Sh-t' - February 18, 2011
Sorry, mine's spoken for
Comments (1) - February 16, 2011
Is murder now a viable political tool in this country? - February 15, 2011
And on the seventh day, God created Conservatives...so Liberals could have something to laugh about - February 14, 2011
Happy Valentine's Day, y'all! May it be as naughty as you want it to be.... - February 14, 2011
Ah, so women ARE property?? - February 13, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Wrong on so many levels
Comments (1) - February 12, 2011
So, there I was, soundly defeated by the sheer undeniable force of superior logic.... - February 12, 2011
Hey...it's a fair question. I don't want to have to overspend. - February 11, 2011
When life hands you lemons, remember that they make great projectiles - February 10, 2011
People don't like change...but, really, where's the harm in it? - February 9, 2011
Finally...something Andrew Zimmern won't put in his mouth - February 7, 2011
So, does this mean The Huffington Post will only be available via dial-up?? - February 6, 2011
This seems almost un-American.... - February 6, 2011
Greetings from Maine: Yeah, we're fat. What's your point??
Comments (1) - February 5, 2011
Don't try this at home, kids...we're pro...uh, we're idiots - February 5, 2011
A $60 million example of backassward priorities
Comments (5) - February 5, 2011
Good; I got tired of waiting for my Nigerian relatives to pay up - February 4, 2011
Today, on "People Unclear On The Concept".... - February 3, 2011
I thought this might be a good career move...then I remembered that I'm not Catholic - February 3, 2011
It will be a great day when you have to go to Saskatchewan to have a cigarette - February 3, 2011
Why I don't miss living in the Midwest.... - February 1, 2011
Something to ponder on a cold, blustery Tuesday - January 31, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: what, no straws?? - January 30, 2011
Two good reasons to love this weekend - January 29, 2011
No one expects the Spanish Inquisition....
Comments (1) - January 28, 2011
Dear Mom and Dad: This is why I suck at life - January 28, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: Man, that has GOT to hurt....
Comments (3) - January 27, 2011
What better way to start your day than with some cute kittens? - January 27, 2011
Today's "WTF??" moment: walking away from $12 million?? - January 26, 2011
Hypocrisy...thou art looking a lot like Megyn Kelly - January 25, 2011
We can all feel like we're making progress...at least for one evening - January 24, 2011
Quick...feed the geese before they attack again.... - January 23, 2011
Keith Olbermann: The nail the sticks up gets hammered down - January 22, 2011
Remember the New Civility? Well, that didn't last long, eh? - January 20, 2011
I'm dreaming of a golf vacation...in Pyongyang - January 19, 2011
You can't fix a problem if you can't be honest about what the problem is (Part Deux) - January 18, 2011
You can't fix a problem if you can't be honest about what the problem is
Comments (1) - January 17, 2011
Words have meaning...and, occasionally, consequences - January 16, 2011
Can't we all just get along? No? Well, OK then.... - January 15, 2011
Something guaranteed to ruin your breakfast on a Saturday morning.... - January 15, 2011
No matter how hard you try, fantasy DOES NOT equal reality - January 14, 2011
Texas: This is what happens when dogma trumps reality - January 13, 2011
A chance to make a difference - January 13, 2011
It's easier to kill the messenger than to hear the message - January 12, 2011
Every action has an equal and opposite overreaction - January 11, 2011
...And we're back. Did anyone miss me? Anyone?? Bueller??
Comments (7) - January 3, 2011
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro....
Comments (1) - January 2, 2011
Sometimes doing the right thing is a pretty simple proposition - January 1, 2011
God, if She in fact exists, hates us with a fiery, unquenchable passion (Ch. 2) - December 31, 2010
A promise I will have no trouble keeping
Comments (1) - December 31, 2010
Protecting good, God-fearing Americans from...themselves - December 31, 2010
May 2011 suck less than 2010. I don't think it could suck more. - December 31, 2010
Just another day in the park - December 30, 2010
Thanks for saving my seat - December 30, 2010
And I suppose you have a better way to save Denmark??
Comments (1) - December 30, 2010
Sometimes, living well really IS the best revenge - December 29, 2010
Greetings from Third World America.... - December 29, 2010
If I'm not Mr. Right, can I be Mr. Right Now? - December 28, 2010
God, if She in fact exists, hates us with a fiery, unquenchable passion - December 28, 2010
Truth is the first casualty.... - December 26, 2010
Sometimes, the world isn't such a bad place after all - December 25, 2010
A Christmas wish
Comments (1) - December 25, 2010
A holy war just might solve this problem
Comments (2) - December 25, 2010
Not exactly what I'm having for Christmas dinner - December 25, 2010
Tempting though it may be, I think my career path will be heading in a different direction - December 24, 2010
Merry Christmas...smoke 'em if you got 'em - December 23, 2010
Lest I forget...HAPPY FESTIVUS!! - December 23, 2010
It was a civil rights triumph that most Americans don't even fully understand
Comments (1) - December 22, 2010
Happy Holidays from the crack staff at WWJD - December 22, 2010
A WWJD Christmas public service...you can thank me later - December 22, 2010
Have yourself a very smelly Christmas - December 21, 2010
Today's dose of reality and perspective - December 20, 2010
The NFL: Just another commercial delivery system??
Comments (4) - December 19, 2010
Isn't about time to do the right thing for the right reasons? - December 18, 2010
And the most over-exposed celebrity of 2010 is....
Comments (2) - December 18, 2010
'Tis the season to be.... - December 17, 2010
In case you were wondering how to avoid a terrorist attack - December 16, 2010
Yes, Virginia; some of us ARE more equal than others - December 16, 2010
A good place to have the time of your half-life - December 16, 2010
There's a time and a place for this, and it's called "college" - December 16, 2010
This is why I like bad girls - December 15, 2010
Back to the frozen future...again - December 15, 2010
Thanks for asking, but this isn't what I had in mind for a stocking stuffer - December 14, 2010
No, MSNBC and Fox Noise Channel are NOT mirror images - December 14, 2010
The Christmas gift for the man in your life who thinks he has everything - December 14, 2010
Today's "WTF??" moment: truly, deeply disturbing mental imagery
Comments (2) - December 13, 2010
An engineering marvel...or not
Comments (3) - December 13, 2010
Hypocrisy in the service of liberty is...really rather entertaining - December 11, 2010
Texas: Where Freedom reigns (or not) - December 11, 2010
This is why I played basketball in high school.... - December 9, 2010
Uh...you had me at "she skydived naked" - December 8, 2010
No...it's not winter at WWJD world headquarters. It just feels like it. - December 7, 2010
It's not paranoia if you really are being watched - December 6, 2010
The closest I'll ever get to royalty - December 6, 2010
From the mouths of babes.... - December 4, 2010
It was on da Interwebs...so it MUST be true - December 3, 2010
Cleveland: the immaturity capitol of America
Comments (1) - December 2, 2010
Much ado about less than nothing - December 2, 2010
By hating "The Other", aren't we ultimately hating ourselves? - December 1, 2010
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us - November 30, 2010
I know what I'm going to want on my Pumpkin Pie this year - November 29, 2010
Two career paths I'll probably pass on - November 29, 2010
Somewhere warm and breezy, Ayn Rand is smiling - November 28, 2010
Floating blissfully down the River Denial - November 27, 2010
May your holiday season be a happy (but not explosive) one - November 26, 2010
You know you have WAY too much time on your hands when.... - November 26, 2010
Hate: it's not just a good idea. It's the law in far too many places. - November 25, 2010
If you're not going to watch football today, here's a suggestion - November 25, 2010
Happy Thanksgiving, y'all.... - November 25, 2010
Why I'm doing cannonballs in the deep end of the Schadenfeude pool
Comments (2) - November 24, 2010
There's no wrong way to do the right thing: end DADT now - November 24, 2010
It's true; bacon makes EVERYTHING better! - November 23, 2010
OK...anyone care to explain why Socialism is inherently evil?
Comments (1) - November 22, 2010
You know you live in the middle of nowhere when....
Comments (2) - November 22, 2010
Incisive campaign analysis from Captain Obvious - November 20, 2010
Doing the right thing for the right reason - November 20, 2010
Another item for my Christmas list - November 19, 2010
Somewhere warm and breezy, Eugene Ionesco is smiling - November 19, 2010
Chasing the ghost of Sam Bowie - November 17, 2010
Perhaps it's time to play to my strengths?? - November 16, 2010
Chocolate: Helping guys get laid since the 4th century
Comments (1) - November 15, 2010
This week on "Security Theater of the Absurd" - November 15, 2010
Greetings from Oklahoma: Where sense and reason go to die - November 13, 2010
Why sowing hatred and fear can be a great career move - November 12, 2010
We don't have nearly enough to fear...so let's invent things to obsess over - November 12, 2010
The #1 threat to humanity: UNBELIEVING BEARS!!! - November 11, 2010
A victory for my...and our...right to breathe clean air
Comments (3) - November 11, 2010
A WWJD public service for my readers in Alabama - November 10, 2010
A keyboard, a bad attitude, and way too much time on my hands - November 10, 2010
Crazier than a March Hare...and built to stay that way - November 9, 2010
Today's special: Celestial Seasonings' new "Xenophbia Blend" white tea - November 8, 2010
You say "Conservative Internment Camp" like it's a bad thing - November 6, 2010
If he'd worked for Fox Noise Channel, they'd probably match his donations
Comments (1) - November 5, 2010
An open letter to the President...for what it's worth
Comments (1) - November 4, 2010
A simple wish.... - November 4, 2010
No, both sides are NOT equally evil, despite what you want to believe - November 4, 2010
My takeaways from a disappointing Election Night - November 3, 2010
Rule #1: Don't be a dick
Comments (2) - November 3, 2010
The triumph of ignorance and reaction - November 2, 2010
Somewhere between the Apocalypse and a Bacchanal - November 1, 2010
IS this the America you want? If you don't vote, it could be the America you get. - November 1, 2010
Really, what could be more uniquely American than manufactured fear of the unknown?
Comments (1) - October 30, 2010
Perhaps I'm looking in the wrong places?? - October 30, 2010
Karma can be a real b---h, eh? - October 29, 2010
Then again, perhaps it's not supposed to make sense - October 28, 2010
And you wonder why I don't miss Texas.... - October 28, 2010
And here I thought it was because of all the drugs I did in the '60s - October 26, 2010
Hmm...not sure how I missed this gem over the weekend.... - October 26, 2010
Today on the Idiocracy Channel.... - October 26, 2010
My new motto.... - October 26, 2010
It's not my Whopper...and it's certainly nacho Whopper - October 23, 2010
A lesson I'm still trying to learn - October 21, 2010
Can we please stop the stupid??
Comments (1) - October 21, 2010
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us - October 20, 2010
The death of civility and rational thought - October 20, 2010
And you wonder why I'm so militantly anti-smoking? - October 20, 2010
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us - October 19, 2010
Lonely seagull at low tide. Oceanside, OR. 10.16.10 - October 19, 2010
Oceanside, OR, at low tide. 10.16.10 - October 18, 2010
The story of my life - October 18, 2010
And this is why I love living in Oregon - October 18, 2010
Government of, by, and for phenomenally stupid people - October 18, 2010
Low tide. Oceanside, OR. 10.16.10 - October 18, 2010
Unlucky jellyfish. Oceanside, OR. 10.16.10 - October 17, 2010
Gas station men's room. Tillamook, OR. 10.16.10.
Comments (2) - October 16, 2010
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life...but in your case, we'll make an exception
Comments (1) - October 14, 2010
It was all fun and games until they figured out that there was money to be had - October 14, 2010
Send us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be small-time criminals - October 13, 2010
Government of, by, and for cowards
Comments (1) - October 11, 2010
It's a small world, after all...and getting smaller by the day
Comments (3) - October 11, 2010
Shouldn't every day be National Coming Out Day?? - October 8, 2010
Democrats and dildos...or, why you might want to re-think running for Congress - October 6, 2010
If John Galt had been a firefighter.... - October 4, 2010
Just in case you were wondering what you're feeding your children - October 4, 2010
Greetings from the People's Idiocracy of AmeriKKKa - October 2, 2010
Memo to the wealthy: time to step up and stop your whining - September 30, 2010
A good reason to be proud to be Irish - September 30, 2010
It just looks like Hell froze over - September 30, 2010
Teh stoopid...it burnz!!! - September 30, 2010
This post has been satirized for your protection and edification
Comments (1) - September 29, 2010
No, it just looks like downtown San Francisco.... ;-) - September 29, 2010
Lies, damn lies...and the exploitation of the masses - September 29, 2010
We're Americans; it's about time we begin acting like it - September 27, 2010
This post has been satirized for your protection - September 25, 2010
No good deed goes unpunished, eh? - September 24, 2010
Welcome to the New World Order
Comments (1) - September 23, 2010
Another WWJD Public Service: Today's Word of the Day is "Literally" - September 20, 2010
Isn't it about time you knew what your red herring actually represents? - September 19, 2010
Wow...an intelligent, articulate, and REASONABLE dissenting point of view - September 18, 2010
If you're not ashamed, you're not paying attention...or you just don't care - September 15, 2010
These folks aren't my heroes...and that's probably a good thing - September 15, 2010
Today's communique from the "Pointless Waste of Time" Department - September 14, 2010
Greetings from the set of "Idiocracy II: They're scary. They're stupid. And they vote"
Comments (1) - September 14, 2010
Truth isn't stranger than fiction, it just stands up to scrutiny better - September 11, 2010
An idea all of us should be able to get behind
Comments (1) - September 10, 2010
OK, I'll cop to it...I admire Meghan McCain
Comments (2) - September 10, 2010
What I didn't do during my summer vacation - September 9, 2010
Credit where credit is due: Somewhere warm and breezy, Jesus is smiling into his Corona - September 9, 2010
Are you ready for some football?? - September 8, 2010
Yes, thank you; I'm aware of the risks of peeing into the wind
Comments (4) - September 7, 2010
Happy Tuesday...or not
Comments (2) - September 6, 2010
Everything I need to know I learned on Facebook...which explains why I'm such a mess - September 3, 2010
Nine years of smoke and mirrors
Comments (3) - September 1, 2010
A truly bad idea whose time has definitely not come
Comments (1) - August 30, 2010
America the mediocre, hateful, and self-absorbed - August 29, 2010
Another WWJD public service...because we care - August 26, 2010
Questions don't always need answers - August 26, 2010
Seru na vás a kone, ktoré ste sa v jazdili na
Comments (2) - August 25, 2010
Like I was planning on moving to Philadelphia....
Comments (2) - August 24, 2010
When good people speak up, there just might be hope - August 23, 2010
Wait...the undead have lawyers?? - August 21, 2010
Things I've learned from da Interwebs
Comments (2) - August 20, 2010
Some random, poorly organized thoughts on the "Ground Zero Mosque" - August 20, 2010
A joke to start your day ;-) - August 20, 2010
Yes, bacon makes EVERYTHING better - August 19, 2010
And you wonder why I loves da Interwebs - August 18, 2010
On today's menu at the Myocardial Infarction Grill....
Comments (2) - August 18, 2010
Is it wrong to want to tell him to go fornicate himself?
Comments (1) - August 17, 2010
It's been said that living well is the best revenge.... - August 16, 2010
I tied for first...but lost on penalty kicks - August 16, 2010
Nattering nabobs of negativism?? Or just Liberals expecting promises be kept?? - August 13, 2010
Today's handy reservoir...er, political tip - August 13, 2010
The decline and fall of...us - August 12, 2010
Irrational people need not apply.... - August 12, 2010
Another items on the list of things I'm just too old and un-hip to understand - August 11, 2010
You almost need a program in order to know who to hate
Comments (1) - August 11, 2010
There's no wrong way to do the right thing...even five years later - August 10, 2010
Not exactly love in the time of cholera, is it? - August 7, 2010
One man's beaver is another's...uh, do we REALLY need to go there??
Comments (1) - August 6, 2010
A question for the American Sheeple: Where were you?? - August 5, 2010
Another trip down the rabbit hole with yet another existential crisis
Comments (3) - August 5, 2010
Is it really that hard to find reasons to get along? Islam is not the enemy. - August 3, 2010
So...remind me again how marriage is under attack??
Comments (2) - August 2, 2010
Back to the future...again - August 1, 2010
This is why I rely on leeches - July 31, 2010
The freedom to be stupid...we has it - July 31, 2010
I'd look for work, but I'm kinda busy learning how to freebase - July 30, 2010
Memo to Cleveland: get over yourselves - July 27, 2010
Y'all should be glad I never had children ;-) - July 24, 2010
This time, it really is personal - July 24, 2010
And it's cheaper than Viagra.... - July 23, 2010
From the "And we care about this...why??" Department - July 22, 2010
When Fox News says it's not about race...it's about the scary Black People - July 21, 2010
It's good to know that USC has their priorities straight, eh? - July 20, 2010
The #1 threat to America? No, it's not bears. Try Libraries.
Comments (2) - July 19, 2010
You know we're in trouble when we have to look at North Korea to feel good - July 18, 2010
Pay no attention to the Republicans behind the curtain - July 17, 2010
Because bacon really does make EVERYTHING better...even my iPhone 4 - July 17, 2010
Be careful what you ask for...very, very careful - July 16, 2010
Remember, it's all about caring for the proletariat...except when it's not
Comments (1) - July 15, 2010
Let them eat cake - July 14, 2010
You know you're in Portland when you see a headline like this.... - July 14, 2010
Things were SO much easier when they knew their place and kept to it, Part Deux - July 13, 2010
Since when does doing the right thing require a survey? - July 13, 2010
You know you have WAY too much time on your hands when you lose sleep over a painted beaver
Comments (2) - July 12, 2010
This is why you don't want to make Massa angry - July 11, 2010
Here's a cheery thought for your Sunday morning: welcome to permanent war - July 10, 2010
Pennywise and pound foolish (pun fully intended) - July 9, 2010
Memo to Cleveland: Slavery and indentured servitude is no longer the law of the land - July 8, 2010
LeBron Who?? - July 8, 2010
A pox on all their houses
Comments (1) - July 8, 2010
Unofficial motto of the Iranian government: Panem et circenses. Without the panem. - July 7, 2010
Christmas comes early to Paraguay
Comments (2) - July 7, 2010
Somehow, I think this just might be what Jesus would do - July 6, 2010
You had to know that this was going to happen to Texas eventually
Comments (1) - July 6, 2010
Dreams don't always come true, do they?
Comments (1) - July 5, 2010
Dude, I'm rich!! If you need me, I'll be snorting coke off Paris Hilton's @$$.... - July 5, 2010
People unclear on the concept of...satire - July 4, 2010
OMG!!! WHAT ABOUT OUR POOR, IMPRESSIONABLE CHILDREN!!!
Comments (1) - July 3, 2010
It's good to be King - July 3, 2010
Hell, I'd divorce Woods for $50 million.... - July 2, 2010
A Friday "WTF??" moment - July 2, 2010
May there be a very special place in Hell waiting for them
Comments (1) - July 2, 2010
Leadership and sanity: not exactly what it used to be
Comments (1) - July 1, 2010
Opportunism and personal destruction: an American cottage industry - June 30, 2010
I'm rich!! My next communique will be from a country with no extradition treaty.... - June 30, 2010
Suddenly, I'm a HUGE fan of the Paraguayan soccer team - June 28, 2010
If I was King of the World, things would be very different....
Comments (2) - June 28, 2010
Today's nominees for Headline of the Year - June 27, 2010
If you're intent on digging your grave with your teeth, you're going to LOVE this.... - June 26, 2010
Another rest stop on the Self-Improvement Expressway
Comments (1) - June 25, 2010
I can never get enough of this goal - June 24, 2010
Merry Christmas to me - June 23, 2010
Time to fall on your sword, General - June 22, 2010
Another suggestion for those of y'all intent on digging your grave with your teeth - June 21, 2010
Happy Juneuary - June 21, 2010
So you're wondering why you're still single? - June 20, 2010
Because I have nothing better to do, here are some random musings for a Sunday morning - June 19, 2010
Imagine if a Super Bowl was refereed by a guy from your son's Pop Warner league - June 19, 2010
Life sucks...especially if you're a rabbit lover - June 18, 2010
Making lemonade out of (oil-soaked) lemons - June 17, 2010
You have to know we live in a much different world when.... - June 17, 2010
Arizona: proof that overt racism doesn't require white robes and burning crosses - June 16, 2010
Shh...Kim Jong-il thinks we're at work.... - June 15, 2010
Everything you need to know about America in one handy photograph - June 14, 2010
My life in 18 frames
Comments (1) - June 14, 2010
When an entire nation discovers that you're not perfect...watch out - June 14, 2010
No, I don't play for Ghana...but thanks for asking - June 13, 2010
Once upon a time, in a land that existed only in our imaginations.... - June 11, 2010
The latest communique from the Digging Our Graves With Our Teeth Department - June 11, 2010
Perhaps if we didn't start by teaching our children to hate? Just a thought. - June 9, 2010
Enough action! We DEMAND cheap, meaningless public displays of angst!! - June 9, 2010
A WWJD public service for those of you looking to dig your grave with your teeth - June 9, 2010
Silly me...and here I'd thought gluttony was one of the Seven Deadly Sins - June 7, 2010
(Not exactly) The breakfast of champions - June 5, 2010
AmeriKKKA- Land of the Free, Home of the White, Dominion of the Bigots - June 4, 2010
Now if someone could just invent fast food that didn't suck - June 3, 2010
And while we're thinking of it, thank you for smoking - June 3, 2010
Anger management: what NOT to do
Comments (1) - June 2, 2010
Greetings from (something vaguely resembling) Paradise, eh?
Comments (1) - June 2, 2010
I'm mad as Hell, and...oh, never mind...I'm going to Quizno's - June 1, 2010
OHMIGOD!!! WHAT ABOUT OUR PRECIOUS, IMPRESSIONABLE CHILDREN???
Comments (1) - June 1, 2010
A pox on both their houses - May 31, 2010
It's the unofficial first day of Summer, and...oh, fuhgeddaboudit.... - May 29, 2010
Anyone who's been there knows that "English cuisine" is an oxymoron - May 28, 2010
A lesson I'm still learning - May 28, 2010
You know, with some chocolate sauce this might not be half bad. Not. - May 27, 2010
It's a wonderful life...and not only because it beats the alternative - May 26, 2010
I suppose this is what happens when Jello sticks to the wall - May 26, 2010
I'll have one of these, a Double Down with extra cheese and bacon...and a large order of poutine - May 25, 2010
A recipe for being scarred for life.... - May 24, 2010
Teaching: long hours, low pay, and public disdain. Where do I sign up??
Comments (1) - May 23, 2010
If I was King of the World, these would be closed and hermetically sealed - May 23, 2010
Is it just me...or have I spent a lot of time turning around? - May 23, 2010
Apparently, terrorism isn't much of a threat - May 22, 2010
Indentured servitude? It's alive and well at AT&T.
Comments (1) - May 21, 2010
Just another day in Paradise...or something close to it - May 21, 2010
For those of you lacking the stones to kill yourself quickly.... - May 19, 2010
First they came for our guns. Then our fishing rods. Now they want our ham sandwiches? - May 18, 2010
Is Elena Kagan gay? And why should anyone even care? - May 17, 2010
A day to remember than I'm not 25 any more (as if I needed a reminder) - May 14, 2010
Why does South Carolina hate America??
Comments (1) - May 10, 2010
All hail Steve Jobs - May 9, 2010
Here's to relaxing and enjoying a beautiful sunny Sunday - May 9, 2010
And all it took to start a revolution was one little pill....
Comments (1) - May 7, 2010
Yes, it's true...bacon makes (almost) EVERYTHING better
Comments (1) - May 7, 2010
A question we should be asking - May 6, 2010
A trip down Memory Lane, one hand firmly affixed to a bottle of Pepto-Bismol - May 6, 2010
Ignorant. Racist. Exploitative. And, yes, it's built to stay that way. - May 5, 2010
It's no surprise what kind of world I want to live in - May 3, 2010
Happy Monday...unless you happen to be a sea turtle in the Gulf of Mexico - May 3, 2010
For those of you intent on digging your grave with your teeth.... - May 2, 2010
File this under "It wouldn't hurt if it wasn't true"
Comments (1) - April 30, 2010
Today, Jack is.... - April 29, 2010
I know; I'd be drinking to forget it, too.... - April 29, 2010
Smart man...foolish choices. I think I could write a book. ;-)
Comments (2) - April 29, 2010
You can take this as a warning of things to come...or not
Comments (1) - April 28, 2010
Another WWJD public service.... - April 28, 2010
Today's challenges
Comments (1) - April 27, 2010
Did the Earth move for you? - April 26, 2010
Idiocracy: more than just a movie. It's a movement. - April 26, 2010
A.D.D- the only thing I could possibly have in common with Albert Einstein - April 25, 2010
This is why you're fat...and nutritionally illiterate (Part Deux) - April 24, 2010
This is why you're fat...and nutritionally illiterate
Comments (1) - April 22, 2010
Something I probably should have done long before now
Comments (1) - April 20, 2010
I wish I was a better person
Comments (2) - April 19, 2010
Those who cannot remember history join the Tea Party - April 19, 2010
Damnit, where's my AARP card?? ;-)
Comments (2) - April 14, 2010
So you want to commit suicide, but you're out of bullets....? - April 12, 2010
Monday's "ick" moment - April 9, 2010
Today's sign that the recession is over - April 9, 2010
Massa just hates it when the servants get uppity - April 8, 2010
So, tell me why veganism isn't one heartbeat from communism?? - April 6, 2010
Just another example of The Man keeping us down.... - April 5, 2010
Go ahead...die like a man!!
Comments (1) - April 4, 2010
Happy Zombie Jesus Day!!
Comments (2) - April 2, 2010
The impact of a life is measured in the joy left behind - April 1, 2010
Selective outrage...or selective ignorance?
Comments (6) - April 1, 2010
Questions desperately in search of answers - March 31, 2010
Doing good by doing...well, not much of anything - March 30, 2010
Questions desperately in search of answers - March 29, 2010
Somewhere, Ayn Rand is spinning furiously in her grave
Comments (1) - March 29, 2010
Unfortunately, arrogance and self-righteousness only means you're a three-percenter
Comments (1) - March 28, 2010
Ignorance of reality in the pursuit of liberty is no crime...but it probably should be - March 27, 2010
Questions desperately in search of answers
Comments (2) - March 26, 2010
What would Jesus do? Probably something like this. - March 25, 2010
A communique from Crybaby Nation - March 25, 2010
Questions I'd really like answers for - March 24, 2010
Vacant souls unoccupied by the verities of knowledge - March 23, 2010
Let me tell you about my country
Comments (1) - March 23, 2010
"HELL NO, YOU CAN'T!!" vs. "Yes, we can!"...or nothing vs. something - March 22, 2010
Do not pass "Go". Do not collect $200. Go directly to Hell. NOW.
Comments (1) - March 22, 2010
Oh, man...I'm in SO much trouble.... ;-)
Comments (3) - March 21, 2010
And you wonder why I fear for the future of my country.... - March 20, 2010
So, you think I'm not worth s--t? Au contraire, mon ami.... - March 19, 2010
This is why I don't post as "Jihad Jack" - March 17, 2010
A confederacy of dunces - March 16, 2010
Questions I'd really like answers for - March 13, 2010
We're better than this...aren't we? - March 12, 2010
Despite all the rumors, I'm NOT schtupping Carla Bruni-Sarkozy - March 12, 2010
Move along...nothing to see here.... ;-) - March 11, 2010
Breaking the spell
Comments (6) - March 10, 2010
So women really ARE the property of men? They will be soon.
Comments (1) - March 9, 2010
It's about protecting us from the Evil Brown People
Comments (2) - March 7, 2010
A year later, and my right to breath cleaner air still reigns supreme - March 6, 2010
Because it's a beautiful Saturday in Paradise, here's a picture of a puppy - March 5, 2010
This is why I will never, EVER, have my own TV show - March 4, 2010
They like me. They really like me.... ;-) - March 4, 2010
Today's trip down the rabbit hole that is my psyche....
Comments (1) - March 2, 2010
Not to proud to beg.... - March 2, 2010
Another dispatch from the front lines
Comments (4) - March 1, 2010
Evil 3, Good 2...but it was a helluva game, eh?
Comments (1) - March 1, 2010
Capitalismo o muerto!! Viva capitalismo!! - February 28, 2010
If only I could have known then what I know now.... - February 28, 2010
Republican (n.): hypocritical, insensitive, out of touch - February 26, 2010
Sometimes the jokes...well, they just write themselves....
Comments (5) - February 25, 2010
The best news coverage money can buy...or manipulate - February 24, 2010
Not even if my sliding partner was a naked Rachel McAdams....
Comments (1) - February 23, 2010
Just another day in Paradise - February 23, 2010
A terrorist and a murderer cannot be a hero. Period.
Comments (3) - February 23, 2010
Sometimes, even I have to admit that I may have been wrong - February 23, 2010
The pancakes are horrible, the coffee is weak, but it's free.... - February 22, 2010
The only thing missing was the white horse he rode in on
Comments (4) - February 21, 2010
We're taking on water...but we're bailing as fast as we can ;-)
Comments (1) - February 21, 2010
This blog is proof of this theory - February 20, 2010
He who live in gas tank best stay away from lighters - February 20, 2010
Because White Folks are patriots, not terrorists - February 19, 2010
Desperate times. Desperate people. Desperate measures. - February 18, 2010
I really need to stop watching the news.... - February 17, 2010
Too fat to fly? Too stupid to understand bad PR. - February 16, 2010
Another communique from the mountaintop - February 15, 2010
A Saturday morning "WTF??" moment - February 15, 2010
There's no right way to do the wrong thing - February 14, 2010
Denying reality does not make it any less real - February 13, 2010
They get the gold mine...and we get the shaft - February 12, 2010
We come, we go...and the best we can hope for is to be missed - February 12, 2010
Maintaining perspective and keeping the faith - February 11, 2010
A WWJD public service for our female readers - February 10, 2010
Into my miserable, pointless existence comes a ray of sunshine - February 9, 2010
No, I'm not a traitor to the cause...just a realist - February 9, 2010
Uh...so where were you in 1983? - February 9, 2010
Things I think I might be thinking.... - February 8, 2010
Today challenges.... - February 8, 2010
There's no wrong way (or time) to do the right thing - February 6, 2010
When stupidity is outlawed, only outlaws will be stupid - February 6, 2010
The times, they are a'changin'...and not necessarily for the better - February 6, 2010
And I just contributed to the juvenile bull---t - February 6, 2010
Much ado over less than nothing - February 5, 2010
Reality sure isn't what it used to be.... - February 5, 2010
Now, if I could just turn #3 to my advantage.... ;-) - February 4, 2010
Life is what happens while you're looking over your shoulder - February 4, 2010
Meet my evil twins - February 3, 2010
Jack in exile: Day 3. I think I'm turning Japanese. I really think so. - February 2, 2010
Another chapter in my story of life, love, and loss - February 2, 2010
Looks like someone was at my last birthday party.... - February 1, 2010
If there had been time, mine would have looked a lot like this ;-) - February 1, 2010
The best is yet to come...hopefully ;-) - February 1, 2010
Back to the salt mines...oh, wait.... - February 1, 2010
Today's challenges.... - January 30, 2010
And now for something completely different - January 28, 2010
If a President falls in the forest, and no one's there to hear it.... - January 28, 2010
But can it rebuild Haiti or cure HIV/AIDS? - January 27, 2010
Let the speculation begin, eh? - January 25, 2010
They'll lead us to water...but they won't let us drink - January 25, 2010
Today's challenges - January 25, 2010
I normally don't traffic in rumors, but.... - January 25, 2010
It dawned on me that I grew up in a much different world when.... - January 25, 2010
Things I think I might be thinking.... - January 24, 2010
Another WWJD public service - January 23, 2010
Things I think I might be thinking.... - January 22, 2010
Today's challenges - January 21, 2010
Things I think I might be thinking.... - January 19, 2010
Something to ponder - January 18, 2010
Hero worship only goes so far.... - January 16, 2010
How about y'all stop acting like anyone should actually care? - January 16, 2010
Today's challenges - January 15, 2010
In 2010, I know I can do at least one thing that might make a difference - January 14, 2010
Today's challenges - January 13, 2010
Today's challenges - January 12, 2010
A vast time suck...or a harbinger of the approaching Apocalypse? - January 11, 2010
Today's challenges - January 11, 2010
Considering what should be accepted without question - January 10, 2010
Ah, yes; it's good to be King.... - January 10, 2010
Today's challenges
Comments (1) - January 10, 2010
And this is why I watch only football on Sundays - January 8, 2010
Today's challenges - January 8, 2010
HELP WANTED: Someone to replace us as the world's moral policeman - January 7, 2010
A bit late for the anger management classes, don'tchathink?? - January 6, 2010
Some folks think I'm an ordained minister...in the Church of Satan
Comments (4) - January 4, 2010
When you come to the fork in the road...take it
Comments (1) - January 3, 2010
Things I might be thinking.... - January 2, 2010
Things I might be thinking....
Comments (2) - January 1, 2010
Happy 2010, y'all! R u ready 4 some football?? - January 1, 2010
Yeah, this pretty well sums up an amazing year - January 1, 2010
Things I might be thinking.... - December 31, 2009
Then again, for some of us it's just time to buy a new calendar
Comments (5) - December 30, 2009
A White Christmas...four days late - December 29, 2009
Yeah, but here's the problem: they're moving to Texas
Comments (5) - December 28, 2009
Things I might be thinking...if I was healthy enough to think - December 25, 2009
May your Christmas have been this good ;-) - December 25, 2009
Fr‚à ö‚à Çhliche Weihnachten from the staff at WWJD world headquarters
Comments (1) - December 25, 2009
AlI I want for Christmas is for someone to rub my belly - December 24, 2009
I hope has something left for me after he's done in Afghanistan - December 24, 2009
Ignore at your own...and your children's...peril
Comments (2) - December 23, 2009
Are you part of the solution...or are you the problem? - December 22, 2009
Neither health, nor care...and certainly not reform
Comments (2) - December 21, 2009
Time to admit just how far I fall short - December 15, 2009
Things I might be thinking.... - December 14, 2009
Hey, it's not like we have to worry about a recession or anything - December 11, 2009
Happy Friday, eh?
Comments (1) - December 9, 2009
Far be it from us to revel in the suffering of others, but.... - December 8, 2009
What happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas, knowhutimean?? - December 5, 2009
Permission to flay them alive and boil them in oil?
Comments (5) - December 3, 2009
Those who don't know history are...oh, never mind....
Comments (2) - December 1, 2009
Just a thought.... - November 30, 2009
Perhaps they got their consultants from the airline industry? - November 28, 2009
DUDE!! I'M RICH!! - November 26, 2009
Happy Football...er, Turkey Day, y'all!! - November 24, 2009
Yeah, but can the unemployed call in coordinates for an airstrike?
Comments (1) - November 21, 2009
Things I might be thinking...if, in fact, I was actually thinking...which, apparently, I'm not - November 20, 2009
Welcome home, soldier. Now get over yourself and get on with your life. - November 18, 2009
An open letter to Michael Steele - November 17, 2009
New hire orienation at Gulag Archipelago, Inc. - November 15, 2009
Oh, dear God...how will I ever be able to compete with this??
Comments (1) - November 12, 2009
Things I might be thinking...if in fact I was actually thinking - November 10, 2009
Why didn't they look like this when I was in college?? - November 5, 2009
Funny...my doctor never mentioned this treatment option - October 30, 2009
A list of my own....
Comments (2) - October 29, 2009
Things I might be thinking if someone hadn't kept me up late - October 27, 2009
Pet Peeve #437 - October 26, 2009
Another trip down the rabbit hole? Nah, not this time....
Comments (1) - October 24, 2009
Things I'm still trying to figure out...but probably never will
Comments (2) - October 23, 2009
How would I know? I'm a guy....
Comments (1) - October 21, 2009
Let me drop a not-so-subtle hint on y'all.... - October 19, 2009
Normally, I'm not into self-promotion, but.... - October 17, 2009
Karma...or, "What goes around eventually comes back around"
Comments (2) - October 16, 2009
Things I think I might think...if I was actually thinking that I might be thinking - October 13, 2009
And now for something completely different....
Comments (3) - September 29, 2009
First they came for my toilet paper.... - September 28, 2009
Just when I'd begun to thinking I was in rough shape.... - September 28, 2009
Finding humor in the inherently unfunny...or, damn it; where did I bury those bodies??
Comments (1) - September 26, 2009
Who are you...and what have you done with Jack??
Comments (1) - September 25, 2009
Digging our graves with our teeth and our low standards
Comments (1) - September 24, 2009
And now, a word from our sponsor....
Comments (1) - September 21, 2009
I'm not sure what this is, but it sure looks like circling the drain
Comments (10) - September 16, 2009
If this writing thing doesn't work out, at least I'll have a fallback option - September 14, 2009
A year later and still scarred from the experience
Comments (3) - September 13, 2009
Things I think I might be thinking...if I was thinking.... - September 11, 2009
No, I haven't forgotten...but neither am I about to dwell on my grief - September 9, 2009
A trip down the rabbit hole...or, Amerika: Stoopid iz az Stoopid duz - September 8, 2009
Personal responsibility? Hard work? Now THAT'S Socialism!
Comments (2) - September 7, 2009
It's patriotism if you like it...and it's propaganda if you don't - September 6, 2009
Without something to fear, live would hardly be worth living - September 3, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us - August 28, 2009
Rendering the debate over health care reform moot
Comments (2) - August 19, 2009
And he'll be doing the "South Texas Cockroach Stomp"??
Comments (2) - August 18, 2009
Where else but America...? - August 17, 2009
And this time I mean it....
Comments (5) - August 15, 2009
My new retirement plan
Comments (1) - August 14, 2009
Greetings from the set of "Idiocracy II"
Comments (1) - July 31, 2009
I'm just upset that I was left off this list - July 27, 2009
Thank you for helping me save my life
Comments (1) - July 27, 2009
I resemble that remark.... - July 20, 2009
A (very good) day in the life....
Comments (2) - July 18, 2009
Taking the express lane down a slippery slope - July 13, 2009
Still a work in progress - July 10, 2009
And I'm not feeling so terrific myself.... - July 8, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us (Portland edition) - July 5, 2009
Just another quick question.... - June 26, 2009
If it's not working- and it's not- shouldn't we fix it?
Comments (1) - June 22, 2009
Happy Monday.... - June 19, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us - June 17, 2009
How is that we can bomb a village back to the Stone Age...and yet can't provide health for all Americans?
Comments (1) - June 16, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us - June 15, 2009
If you've got this much time on your hands....
Comments (8) - June 11, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us - June 10, 2009
I like it in my world. The voices are friendly...and they never ask "Why?" - June 9, 2009
Standing up for equality...because it's the right thing to do
Comments (1) - June 8, 2009
Perhaps imitation really is the sincerest form of flattery..or is it?? - June 6, 2009
Today's signs that the Apocalypse is upon us - June 5, 2009
Oh, so you mean I'm really not stupid, lazy, and immature??
Comments (4) - June 2, 2009
Reality ain't what it used to be...nor what I'd like it to be. Not by a long shot.
Comments (1) - May 29, 2009
Reality ain't what it used to be...nor what I'd like it to be - May 25, 2009
Here's something I won't be doing this Memorial Day - May 22, 2009
Well, this certainly explains a lot, eh?
Comments (2) - May 22, 2009
How is it that I always manage to miss the really interesting news?? - May 13, 2009
Somebody had to have cheated to come up with this....
Comments (1) - May 11, 2009
And what's so wrong with having an open mind?
Comments (2) - May 10, 2009
Happy Mother's Day!
Comments (1) - May 8, 2009
Yeah, things look different here - May 5, 2009
I'm in the wrong damn line of work.... - April 29, 2009
Pointless, silly...and built to stay that way
Comments (2) - April 23, 2009
On today's episode, I go 12 rounds...with myself
Comments (5) - April 18, 2009
Not exactly where I'd want to find myself on my birthday....
Comments (3) - April 3, 2009
Fiddling while Rome burns
Comments (2) - April 1, 2009
Greetings from beautiful downtown Tabula Rasa, OR.... - March 24, 2009
Another trip down the rabbit hole....
Comments (5) - March 23, 2009
If you're not ashamed of what your country has done in your name, you should be
Comments (2) - March 21, 2009
No, I'm not an @$$hole, but you might not know it at times
Comments (1) - March 20, 2009
Two steps forward. (At least) one step back.
Comments (3) - March 18, 2009
Another watchdog goes the way of the buffalo - March 16, 2009
No, despite what you might think, it does not suck to be me right about now - March 13, 2009
A few random pointless thoughts on a Friday morning....
Comments (2) - March 11, 2009
You might have thought this went away....
Comments (2) - March 8, 2009
And you thought I just made this stuff up.... - March 7, 2009
You can have my iPhone when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers
Comments (2) - March 5, 2009
Notes drawn from a visit from Captain Obvious
Comments (2) - March 5, 2009
Riding on the cutting edge of technology...while trying not to bleed too much
Comments (1) - March 2, 2009
The problem with recognizing that things aren't working is that you actually have to take action in order to set yourself on a different course
Comments (4) - March 2, 2009
Yeah, that's "Heathen", with a capital "H"
Comments (1) - February 28, 2009
Trying to be myself...whoever that may be
Comments (5) - February 26, 2009
Happy birthday to me...or not.... ;-) - February 23, 2009
My kingdom for a decent night's sleep
Comments (6) - February 20, 2009
This just in...men are pigs! - February 18, 2009
Wow...I'll bet this has never happened before...to anyone!! Wait...what?? - February 17, 2009
You've come a long way, baby...or not.... - February 16, 2009
Be patient with me, I'm still a work in progress
Comments (1) - February 15, 2009
If you meet the Buddha on the road, could you ask him to call me?
Comments (3) - February 14, 2009
And I've used up almost everything I've got.... - February 13, 2009
So, do I get the flowers or the chainsaw this year??
Comments (5) - February 12, 2009
Why not good things? - February 11, 2009
OK, so I'm a couple days early. I thought it would be nice to beat the rush.
Comments (5) - February 10, 2009
If you need me, I'll be in the kitchen playing Russian Roulette
Comments (1) - February 9, 2009
So this is what it's supposed to feel like?
Comments (2) - February 6, 2009
It's not easy being universally loved...why is why I'm not
Comments (1) - February 5, 2009
If only uncertainty wasn't so...uncertain
Comments (1) - February 5, 2009
Hypocritical...and seemingly built to stay that way
Comments (1) - February 4, 2009
If life is suffering, I'm living large....
Comments (3) - February 3, 2009
Another lesson in wisdom, I suppose
Comments (3) - February 2, 2009
So let it be written. So let it be done. Unless you've got a better idea.
Comments (3) - January 31, 2009
If I'm going to feel like this, I'm glad it's on a Saturday morning - January 30, 2009
Change is a'coming...or maybe not
Comments (12) - January 28, 2009
Proof positive of the decline and fall of Western civilization
Comments (1) - January 25, 2009
A trip to my favorite place in Portland
Comments (2) - January 21, 2009
A few random thoughts from Inauguration Day - January 19, 2009
And the down side of this would be...??
Comments (1) - January 16, 2009
20 (fairly) random things you might not know about me
Comments (1) - January 9, 2009
When life hands you a bushel of lemons, try throwing them at passing cars - January 4, 2009
Yet another victory for my lungs
Comments (1) - January 3, 2009
Happy New Year! It sucks just like the old one, doesn't it? - January 2, 2009
Yeah...my New Year's celebration was just like this.... - January 1, 2009
January 1st? Damn...must be time to buy a new calendar....
Comments (2) - December 30, 2008
Another victory for my lungs
Comments (2) - December 26, 2008
Yeah, they're crazier than a March hare...but they've got a point
Comments (1) - December 25, 2008
Happy Hannukwanzaafestimas!! - December 24, 2008
My Christmas gift to y'all...just be grateful I decided not to sing this year ;-)
Comments (1) - December 23, 2008
Greetings from Iceland....
Comments (3) - December 23, 2008
There was no confirmation on reports that the Ministry of Silly Walks would be filing an official protest - December 22, 2008
A message for someone I love.... - December 19, 2008
Things I'd like to see in my lifetime....
Comments (3) - December 18, 2008
At least I'd die with a smile on my face
Comments (1) - December 17, 2008
You might want to hug your children just a little bit harder today
Comments (2) - December 15, 2008
I'm dreaming of a white Chris...oh, never mind.... - December 5, 2008
This message was brought to you by the same fine folks who brought you Proposition 8 - December 4, 2008
Greetings from Oregon...things look a wee bit different here - December 3, 2008
Late as usual...but better that than never - December 1, 2008
Remember, this year.... - November 30, 2008
I know; I'm not sure I remember what to do, either.... - November 30, 2008
Planning a vacation used to be such an uncomplicated process....
Comments (2) - November 29, 2008
'Cuz Lord knows I'm making a list and checking it twice ;-) - November 28, 2008
Methinks perhaps it might just be time for a wee bit o' poetic justice
Comments (1) - November 27, 2008
Ah, memories...nothing goes better with football than.... - November 27, 2008
Thanksgiving seems a good time to give thanks, no? - November 27, 2008
If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we come up with a decent playoff system? - November 26, 2008
The stupid...it burns!! And it needs to stop.
Comments (1) - November 25, 2008
I also accept cash...especially in large sums - November 18, 2008
Would that more of us could follow these simple rules - November 13, 2008
Be the change you wish to see in the world. Or not. - November 9, 2008
Pardon me while I snicker in my Hefeweizen....
Comments (1) - November 6, 2008
Tequila loves me even if you don't....
Comments (1) - November 6, 2008
Twin sons of different mothers? Uh...not likely.... - November 6, 2008
A few random thoughts as I try to adapt to finally being home - November 5, 2008
The first in a series of words and phrases I hope I will never hear again
Comments (1) - November 5, 2008
It wasn't me...I swear!!
Comments (1) - November 4, 2008
This Election Day, make the right choice....
Comments (1) - November 1, 2008
Things to do in Anahuac, TX, when you're dead....
Comments (2) - October 26, 2008
Another postcard from Hell
Comments (2) - October 23, 2008
You know it's been a long campaign when you look at your Facebook page and see.... - October 23, 2008
Can you be "just folks" in an Armani suit and Manolo Blahnik pumps?
Comments (2) - October 22, 2008
Here's a shock; I'm going to say something nice about Houston
Comments (2) - October 19, 2008
And the sky in his world would be...a healthy shade of rose??
Comments (1) - October 17, 2008
Greetings from Hell...again - October 15, 2008
Another trip to somewhere not really resembling Paradise
Comments (3) - October 13, 2008
I've heard it said that life sometimes allows second chances....
Comments (1) - October 10, 2008
Be it ever so humble...I'm freezing my @$$ off here!
Comments (1) - October 10, 2008
Stoopid...and not afraid to display it openly and unabashedly - October 9, 2008
Yes, there is something to be said for sleeping in your own bed
Comments (1) - October 9, 2008
This won't be well-received, but someone needs to say it - October 8, 2008
Be it ever so humble...yes, it's good to be home
Comments (3) - October 7, 2008
I'm Hugh Jass, and I approved this message - October 6, 2008
No, I'm not an @$$hole, but it can be hard to tell at times
Comments (1) - October 5, 2008
I lived here for 3722 days? What in the world was I thinking??? - October 4, 2008
And it just keeps better...doesn't it??
Comments (2) - October 4, 2008
The secret to a happy life lies in knowing where to bury the bodies you leave in your wake - October 3, 2008
Ten things I hate about Houston (or, why driving in this town is like having a lobotomy sans anethesia) - October 2, 2008
This is not how I want to remember Galveston
Comments (2) - October 1, 2008
A day to relax and enjoy...what?
Comments (4) - October 1, 2008
Have mercy; I was a history major
Comments (1) - September 30, 2008
Now I understand why the mayor suggested bringing rat bait.... - September 29, 2008
It's not as if they weren't warned.... - September 28, 2008
It's all coming back to me now....
Comments (1) - September 27, 2008
Another day in a place that feels less like Hell with each passing day - September 27, 2008
Somewhere, my grandparents are snickering in the beer - September 26, 2008
Imagining the unimaginable - September 25, 2008
Baby steps.... - September 24, 2008
Living on Houston time - September 23, 2008
If it's Tuesday, I must be...wait, it's Tuesday?? - September 17, 2008
Wake me up when September ends
Comments (1) - September 11, 2008
How about we- all of us- just stop, look around, and do something to make a difference today? - September 9, 2008
LIfe if what happens when you're trying to get over yourself - September 8, 2008
No, it's not Paradise, but it ain't Houston, either
Comments (1) - September 1, 2008
Another day in Paradise.... - August 30, 2008
Ask me again how much I miss Texas.... - August 23, 2008
Here's something else I don't understand.... - August 20, 2008
Life is apparently what happens when you're not taking care of business
Comments (2) - August 18, 2008
When the gods want to punish you, they answer your prayers...and give you an iPhone - August 16, 2008
Can I have my country back?
Comments (4) - August 15, 2008
Greetings from Hell.... ;-)
Comments (1) - August 14, 2008
Does this make me a bad person?
Comments (1) - August 13, 2008
Sometimes, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do
Comments (2) - August 12, 2008
It's not easy being anonymous and irrelevant, but I do what I can
Comments (5) - August 8, 2008
Happy Friday, y'all.... - August 7, 2008
This is what happens when a good idea grows up...only to become ridiculous
Comments (2) - August 5, 2008
Ten reesonz wy Kregzlist is th Devill - August 4, 2008
One word of truth shall outweigh the whole world - July 30, 2008
Jack needs a kitten.... - July 29, 2008
Man, the things I'm willing to subject myself to, eh??
Comments (10) - July 26, 2008
The secret to a happy life? Knowing where to bury the bodies.... - July 20, 2008
That pretty much sums it up.... - July 19, 2008
Another quiet Saturday morning...and I got nuthin' - July 16, 2008
If it ain't broke.... - July 14, 2008
This is why I was a History major - July 13, 2008
Sometimes you can't make it on your own...and sometimes you can (apologies to U2) | TrackBacks (-1) - July 4, 2008
Just another day in Paradise...or about as close as I'm gonna get to it.... - June 30, 2008
Life is what happens while you're trying not to go down for the third time
Comments (6) - June 26, 2008
Hey, don't blame us...we're just trying to propagate the species - June 25, 2008
Just a man in a phony red sheet....
Comments (1) - June 24, 2008
Doing the right things for the right reasons...or are we?? | TrackBacks (-3) - June 21, 2008
Happy Saturday...now slowly step away from the keyboard....
Comments (-1) - June 20, 2008
Be it ever so humble (Chapter 2).... - June 19, 2008
Be it ever so humble.... - June 19, 2008
Let the vacation begin...a graphic representation of my next seven days - June 18, 2008
Free at last!! Free at last!! Thank God, Almighty...I'm free at last!! - June 14, 2008
Mine is not to wonder why. Mine is merely to fall on my sword when I'm asked to do so.
Comments (1) - June 10, 2008
Reality? It ain't what it used to be....
Comments (-1) - June 10, 2008
As soon as I buy one...it's already obsolete | TrackBacks (-1) - June 9, 2008
Nice day for a ballgame, eh?
Comments (1) - June 8, 2008
If you need me, I'll probably be in the left field bleachers. I'll be the one with the sunburn.
Comments (-2) - June 6, 2008
The fun. It never ends.
Comments (-2) - June 5, 2008
Just another day in Paradise, eh? - June 5, 2008
History in the making...even though I was too tired to truly appreciate the moment - June 4, 2008
When life gives your lemonade, you make...uh, wait.... | TrackBacks (-1) - June 1, 2008
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us - May 31, 2008
Say hello to yet another existential crisis
Comments (1) - May 31, 2008
And with any luck there will be a lot of it - May 30, 2008
Deja vu all over again...in Cleveland, of all places - May 29, 2008
If it's Thursday, I must be on my way back to Cleveland...again - May 28, 2008
And let's just say that there's a surplus of mystery in my life these days - May 25, 2008
I'm allergic to the Drudge Report, but somehow I don't think that's going away for my benefit any time soon - May 23, 2008
If you are truly fortunate, at least once in the course of your lifetime you will see yourself as you truly are
Comments (-2) - May 23, 2008
And now...a word from our sponsor....
Comments (1) - May 21, 2008
No, it's not Paradise, and no, you can't even see it from here - May 21, 2008
Notes cobbled together while falling in love in a coffee shop
Comments (2) - May 20, 2008
It's not Dante's Seventh Circle of Hell, but you can see it from here
Comments (-4) - May 19, 2008
Good things come to those willing to live in the moment...right?? - May 19, 2008
What didn't happen at my place this weekend - May 18, 2008
Yes, today really IS just another day in Paradise
Comments (-1) - May 17, 2008
All quiet on the Western Front...finally - May 17, 2008
You mean life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness is more than just a pithy saying on a magnetic ribbon??
Comments (-1) - May 16, 2008
Get. over. yourselves. NOW.
Comments (-1) - May 14, 2008
No, for the last time...you CAN'T have a Playstation! - May 13, 2008
That's it; I'm done. Call me after the convention.
Comments (3) - May 12, 2008
Go to Hell. Do not pass "Go". Do not collect $200. Go directly to Hell. NOW....
Comments (1) - May 11, 2008
Happy Mother's Day...to those of you in a position to celebrate it - May 9, 2008
Want to make the world a better place? Here's a good place to start. - May 8, 2008
Mama's little boy may finally be all growed up
Comments (-1) - May 7, 2008
Simplicity for sanity's sake
Comments (-1) - May 5, 2008
Yet another dirty little secret is revealed - May 4, 2008
And a child shall lead them....
Comments (1) - May 3, 2008
You're never to old to achieve a dream...right??
Comments (-1) - May 3, 2008
How 'bout I just get a cigarette and a blindfold and be done with it?? - May 2, 2008
Full of sound and fury, signifying...well, not much of anything, really
Comments (-1) - May 2, 2008
Dealing with the demons - May 2, 2008
This is going to be one of those "Three weeks from now, I'll be wondering how I ever lived without it" things, isn't it??
Comments (1) - April 30, 2008
Sometimes, you just have to close your eyes, drop trou, and slide on the ice
Comments (5) - April 29, 2008
Life is full of risks; I suppose the challenge lies in knowing which ones to take - April 29, 2008
Where not to go on a first date - April 28, 2008
Life really is what happens while you're making other plans
Comments (1) - April 27, 2008
Every now and again the well runs dry - April 25, 2008
And in the naked light I saw...10,000 people with the munchies
Comments (5) - April 24, 2008
I'll even have it delivered to your door! - April 24, 2008
In a break from ongoing Democratic Primary death march....
Comments (-1) - April 23, 2008
Random pointless thoughts - April 23, 2008
Do you smell what Barack is cooking? - April 23, 2008
Doing less...with less - April 22, 2008
Is anybody out there??
Comments (5) - April 21, 2008
If we are in fact a product of our environment, then I should be on the lookout for latte-swilling snipers as I race through a minefield chased by my belt-wielding father and my childhood fears- all while I wonder what sort of parent I might have been.
Comments (3) - April 20, 2008
Sometimes, this very intelligent person can be incredibly (&^%$#@ stupid.... - April 19, 2008
Ah...there's nothing quite so vicariously voyeuristic as watching someone else air their dirty laundry, is there? - April 17, 2008
And you wonder why I'm no longer a Sprint customer....
Comments (2) - April 17, 2008
Your tax dollars at...oh, never mind....
Comments (1) - April 16, 2008
Sometimes, words fail me.... - April 16, 2008
Clueless, pointless...and built to stay that way - April 15, 2008
Another day...another day wishing I could play Russian Roulette
Comments (1) - April 13, 2008
A new package, but still the same rich, creamy goodness you've come to expect
Comments (5) - April 11, 2008
When your expectations are in the toilet, it ain't tough to exceed them - April 8, 2008
Time to do the right thing
Comments (3) - April 7, 2008
File this one under "Things I Never Thought I'd See In My Lifetime"
Comments (1) - April 6, 2008
A problem I'd like to have...I think.... - April 3, 2008
The front runner to be John McCain's VP?? - April 1, 2008
One step forward, four steps back - April 1, 2008
Wake up and smell the cat litter....
Comments (1) - March 27, 2008
More on politicians with defective zippers - March 25, 2008
Cheaters (and liars) never prosper
Comments (24) - March 25, 2008
An open letter to Sen. Hillary Clinton from a disappointed Democrat
Comments (4) - March 22, 2008
I'm not a stalker...but if I was.... - March 20, 2008
Not that I would turn it down....
Comments (1) - March 19, 2008
Remind me again why this man shouldn't be President....
Comments (8) - March 19, 2008
There are pet peeves and then there are things I just don't get
Comments (1) - March 17, 2008
It's good to know that politicians are reflections of our horribly flawed, thoroughly (&^%$# up selves
Comments (2) - March 16, 2008
It's time to send a message...because the world is watching
Comments (4) - March 15, 2008
Hell, I'd do it for half that.... - March 13, 2008
How is it that I manage to miss all the fun?
Comments (7) - March 9, 2008
Like anything else, pain is relative - March 9, 2008
Some sensible thoughts to live by
Comments (1) - March 8, 2008
And after that, we had to walk five miles in a driving snowstorm, uphill both ways.... - March 7, 2008
It sucks to be me...and other tales from the Dark Side
Comments (2) - March 5, 2008
This might be an issue worth letting die
Comments (5) - March 3, 2008
Well, things can only improve from here...right??
Comments (9) - March 2, 2008
And they've always worked for me - March 2, 2008
And you wonder why I've been ashamed of my country for the past eight years....
Comments (4) - February 29, 2008
How do you cope with the unimaginable? - February 25, 2008
A fool and his money are soon parted...especially if that fool is a Republican - February 25, 2008
Things I really don't give a (&^% about
Comments (1) - February 23, 2008
Another TPRS public service - February 19, 2008
Another TPRS public service - February 18, 2008
A tragedy...and no way to understand it
Comments (5) - February 9, 2008
The stoopid!! It burns!!! - February 9, 2008
My high school experience seems pedestrian by comparison - February 8, 2008
It's a process, not a destination
Comments (5) - February 5, 2008
Time changes everything, no? - February 4, 2008
Time to make a difference, y'all....
Comments (1) - February 4, 2008
If this is the biggest problem in your life...I'd like to trade places with you - January 31, 2008
Well, if you can't impeach the President, getting naked is probably the next best thing - January 30, 2008
Gone fishin'.... - January 28, 2008
A winter wonderland...sort of - January 24, 2008
It's not too early too to send in your "Father of the Year" ballot.... - January 23, 2008
Giving my adoring fan base what they want - January 21, 2008
Sometimes I wonder "What if...?"
Comments (2) - January 21, 2008
Time for a healthy helping of Schadenfreude - January 19, 2008
Apropos of absolutely nothing - January 16, 2008
Ain't too proud to beg
Comments (1) - January 16, 2008
Laughter really is the best medicine - January 1, 2008
I don't believe in resolutions, but it is time for a few changes
Comments (8) - January 1, 2008
It wouldn't hurt if it weren't true, right? - December 31, 2007
Greetings from Immaturity Fest 2007 - December 25, 2007
Yes, Virginia...some folks really DO deserve a lump of coal in their stocking this year
Comments (4) - December 24, 2007
May all your stockings get stuffed
Comments (4) - December 23, 2007
Why you never hear "corporate" and "humanity" in the same sentence
Comments (3) - December 19, 2007
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us
Comments (1) - December 19, 2007
And you thought your family was (&^%$#@ up....
Comments (2) - December 7, 2007
Happy Holi...oh, never mind.... - December 6, 2007
Time to recognize those unsung heroes who keep the fabric of our society from fraying
Comments (3) - December 5, 2007
Greetings from (something not quite resembling) Paradise
Comments (2) - December 5, 2007
Hello...and welcome to this week's episode of "Freaks Like Us" - December 4, 2007
Enough is enough
Comments (5) - December 3, 2007
Because sometimes the best gift is laughter - December 2, 2007
No, it's not Paradise, but if it would stop raining, you might be able to see it from here - November 28, 2007
Not quite like fine American craps...er, craftsmanship, eh?
Comments (3) - November 27, 2007
Justice may be blind...but perhaps that's the problem - November 24, 2007
Years to build, a few short minutes to destroy - November 23, 2007
A nice Thanksgiving memory - November 22, 2007
A time to be thankful
Comments (3) - November 22, 2007
No joy in Mudville - November 16, 2007
Guess where I'm not spending Thanksgiving? - November 14, 2007
Thou hypocrite, first cast out the candle out of thine own penis; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the candle out of thy brother's penis - November 13, 2007
Celebrating a football town with a drinking problem
Comments (2) - November 12, 2007
A hypocrite, a liar...AND he has a small penis. Yep; sounds like a Republican, all right. - November 11, 2007
Happy Veteran's Day...time to slap another magnetic ribbon on the SUV, Marge!
Comments (1) - November 11, 2007
Another lesson learned...or not
Comments (2) - November 6, 2007
Jack Cluth: Who (&^%$#@ cares?
Comments (1) - November 5, 2007
Sure, it may LOOK like Paradise....
Comments (3) - November 1, 2007
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us
Comments (2) - October 30, 2007
Sometimes ya just gotta shake things up...but this is ridiculous
Comments (3) - October 30, 2007
A heart attack looking for a place to happen - October 27, 2007
Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?
Comments (2) - October 25, 2007
Today's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us
Comments (3) - October 23, 2007
Be it ever so humble....
Comments (1) - October 16, 2007
Maybe we really do need to be afraid?? - October 15, 2007
I suppose the truth always hurts, eh?
Comments (5) - October 13, 2007
There's apparently a very fine line between cheating death and committing suicide - October 10, 2007
Someday I'll be able to breathe again
Comments (1) - October 9, 2007
My kingdom (such as it is) for clear sinuses
Comments (6) - October 9, 2007
So where do we draw the line? - October 8, 2007
Exactly the same...and yet totally different
Comments (3) - October 7, 2007
There's no statute of limitations on genocide - October 4, 2007
Back to the future?
Comments (13) - October 3, 2007
The eye bleach...it does NOTHING.... - October 3, 2007
Well, Conservatives did start it....
Comments (1) - October 1, 2007
Man, I hope I brought a change of shorts with me
Comments (4) - September 29, 2007
The times...they are a-changin'
Comments (2) - September 29, 2007
All's well that end well - September 26, 2007
OK, there goes my remaining few unsullied childhood memories
Comments (1) - September 21, 2007
Next time I fly anywhere, I'll be reading "The Anarchist's Cookbook"
Comments (5) - September 21, 2007
So you think you're green? - September 20, 2007
Is it really necessary to be so mean?
Comments (3) - September 16, 2007
When will we ever learn? - September 15, 2007
Taking one for the team...again
Comments (8) - September 11, 2007
The end of grieving? Or perhaps the beginning of healing
Comments (7) - September 8, 2007
Jeebus people....grow a pair, willya??? - September 7, 2007
Otherwise, it might look like Montana - September 6, 2007
And now, the star of the show addresses his adoring public....
Comments (5) - September 5, 2007
Uh...what???
Comments (4) - September 4, 2007
Time marches on, but can- or should- we??
Comments (9) - September 4, 2007
Yes, it's time for Captain Obvious to make another appearance
Comments (5) - September 4, 2007
Who's the DUMB@$$ now??
Comments (8) - September 3, 2007
Another metaphorical notch in the bedpost, eh??
Comments (17) - August 31, 2007
Meeting at the intersection of politics and humanity
Comments (1) - August 30, 2007
Another TPRS Public Service
Comments (4) - August 28, 2007
Doing the right thing for the right reasons
Comments (5) - August 24, 2007
Yay, free speech!!
Comments (2) - August 20, 2007
Time to make my stand, y'all....
Comments (9) - August 16, 2007
Just another day in Paradise - August 16, 2007
It's 10pm; do you know which pole your daughter is working??
Comments (3) - August 15, 2007
Maybe I'm just missing something here...or maybe I'm just too stupid to understand our national disdain for the social contract
Comments (6) - August 13, 2007
Is anyone really out there...or, another visit from the random number generator
Comments (5) - July 31, 2007
On the road again....
Comments (1) - July 30, 2007
Time to restate what should be blindingly obvious
Comments (2) - July 24, 2007
It's OK...because I can quit any time I want
Comments (5) - July 23, 2007
Another TPRS movie review
Comments (13) - July 23, 2007
Real men read Harry Potter...they just don't admit to it - July 22, 2007
At least you can feel green
Comments (5) - July 21, 2007
Perhaps we should have checked the sheets a bit more closely
Comments (3) - July 20, 2007
Making a difference in whatever small way I can
Comments (5) - July 19, 2007
A trip back in time - July 18, 2007
Dishonest, unrealistic, and apparently built to stay that way
Comments (3) - July 13, 2007
Then again, I'm not Sean-Paul Kelly.... :O) - July 9, 2007
Greetings from Hell...and it looks like we have company this year - July 9, 2007
A postcard from the Motherland - July 9, 2007
In earlier times, these folks walked battlefields, stealing valuables from dead soldiers
Comments (1) - July 8, 2007
The automotive equivalent of a LIVESTRONG bracelet?
Comments (6) - July 5, 2007
Inquiring minds want to know
Comments (9) - July 5, 2007
Silly me; I'd always been taught that gluttony was one of the seven deadly sins - July 3, 2007
It is with some regret that I must announce the death of the rule of law. Services will be private, and the burial will be televised on Fox News Channel....
Comments (8) - July 2, 2007
The more things change...the more they change
Comments (1) - June 30, 2007
Today's news is brought to you by.... - June 29, 2007
It's always tough to say goodbye....
Comments (3) - June 25, 2007
What's good for the goose is...oh, never mind....
Comments (3) - June 17, 2007
Something to celebrate on Father's Day - June 17, 2007
Waving the white flag of surrender
Comments (2) - June 12, 2007
Try doing this 40 hours a week...or not
Comments (5) - June 10, 2007
The halo should clear customs and be here tomorrow
Comments (2) - June 7, 2007
Well, upgrading from "it sucks" would seem to be a good first step
Comments (6) - June 6, 2007
Man, I am SO glad I didn't know this before we went to DC - June 4, 2007
Can I just go back to bed?
Comments (2) - June 3, 2007
Other than than, Mrs. Lincoln, what did you think about the play? - June 1, 2007
Happy Hurricane Season!!
Comments (4) - May 30, 2007
Just think...the next war could be conducted by a 12-year-old sitting at a keyboard
Comments (1) - May 21, 2007
Back in the saddle again....
Comments (1) - May 19, 2007
Greetings from the Capitol of the entire Free World
Comments (1) - May 18, 2007
Those who don't know history....
Comments (2) - May 17, 2007
Hallelujah...I can smell again....
Comments (1) - May 16, 2007
Greetings from Hollywood for Ugly People!
Comments (2) - May 15, 2007
Gone, but hopefully not forgotten
Comments (5) - May 13, 2007
Happy Mother's Day...if you dare
Comments (1) - May 13, 2007
Another DUMB@$$ AWARD wiener
Comments (1) - May 13, 2007
Happy Birthday to one of my heroes
Comments (1) - May 10, 2007
Six degrees of well, I'm not quite sure what.... - May 8, 2007
Time for a slight change of course....
Comments (3) - May 2, 2007
A trip down Memory Lane
Comments (2) - May 1, 2007
Today's sign the Apocalypse is upon us - April 30, 2007
And you're wondering why I'm not at work today?? - April 29, 2007
If I wanted Miami Beach, I'd live in Miami Beach
Comments (6) - April 27, 2007
Another dispatch from DogWorld - April 27, 2007
Greenhouse gas emissions? What about celebrity gas emissions?
Comments (2) - April 24, 2007
Finally...some good news
Comments (5) - April 23, 2007
As if the reality of Monday morning wasn't already bad enough....
Comments (4) - April 23, 2007
Another triumph for decency - April 22, 2007
Finding a way to profit off tragedy...how American of you.... - April 19, 2007
Yet another day in (something reasonably close to) Paradise
Comments (7) - April 18, 2007
A tragedy is a tragedy, regardless of where it happens...right??
Comments (2) - April 18, 2007
Another day in (something reasonably close to) Paradise
Comments (5) - April 17, 2007
Another crack in our illusion of safety and security
Comments (9) - April 16, 2007
I ain't what I once was; I've got a few years on me now (apologies to Toby Keith)
Comments (8) - April 14, 2007
It was just a matter of time....
Comments (1) - April 12, 2007
Double standard? And you're surprised??
Comments (5) - April 12, 2007
Welcome to the Real World
Comments (1) - April 11, 2007
Dog wars
Comments (3) - April 10, 2007
Why forgive when you can play the race card to maximum advantage?
Comments (8) - April 8, 2007
This is never a good thing....
Comments (2) - April 7, 2007
Just another day in Paradise...uh, wait....
Comments (2) - April 3, 2007
And here I'd been convinced it couldn't possibly get any worse
Comments (1) - April 1, 2007
So, how 'bout doing your job as a parent instead of whining about the injustice of it all
Comments (1) - March 30, 2007
Hello...my name is Jack, and I'm a cut-and-run defeatocrat....
Comments (1) - March 29, 2007
I know y'all think I make this stuff up...but, au contraire....
Comments (1) - March 28, 2007
There's no good way to implement a bad idea
Comments (8) - March 27, 2007
Republicans never really go away...they just become pundits and media whores (Or, how I learned to deal with Labradoodle diarrhea)
Comments (4) - March 27, 2007
Sometimes, you just have to take responsibility for your own bad decisions
Comments (5) - March 23, 2007
Yes, kids, some things really are more important than politics - March 14, 2007
Hey, I'm just doing what little I can to help protect the Homeland
Comments (4) - March 13, 2007
I love the smell of dog $#!% in the morning. It smells like...well, like dog $#!%....
Comments (5) - March 12, 2007
Why is it that the good, and not the evil, die young?
Comments (1) - March 9, 2007
In my day, "getting drilled" in shop class had a much different meaning - March 8, 2007
Suddenly, vegetarianism is beginning to look rather appealing
Comments (1) - March 7, 2007
It's a business decision...NOT a question of patriotism, Part Troix
Comments (1) - March 2, 2007
You like me! You really...ah, fuhgeddaboudit....
Comments (5) - March 2, 2007
Man, with friends like this, who needs enemas? - February 28, 2007
Why not just brand their foreheads?
Comments (16) - February 27, 2007
Your tax dollars at work...or maybe not
Comments (2) - February 26, 2007
Same as it ever was...anywhere and everywhere
Comments (2) - February 25, 2007
Time for another semi-annual existential crisis
Comments (35) - February 16, 2007
Giving the people what they want...or not - February 12, 2007
Really; you had me at ipanywhere.... - February 10, 2007
Fiddling while Rome burns - February 8, 2007
Perhaps it's time for a little more compassion and a little less dancing on the grave
Comments (12) - February 6, 2007
Every now and again, a little well-placed outrage goes a long ways....
Comments (15) - February 6, 2007
There's a simple solution: don't buy stuff you can't afford
Comments (5) - February 5, 2007
Happy #@$%(&^ Monday....
Comments (6) - February 4, 2007
Happy #@$%(&^ Sunday....
Comments (2) - January 31, 2007
This just in: I'm in the wrong damn line of work
Comments (3) - January 30, 2007
And now for something completely different - January 30, 2007
The "joys" of parenthood
Comments (5) - January 25, 2007
A day late, but the entertainment value is still fresh - January 24, 2007
Yes, officer, I was wearing my seat belt....
Comments (14) - January 19, 2007
The more things change....
Comments (2) - January 18, 2007
I'm getting an early start on my birthday wishlist
Comments (1) - January 17, 2007
Another appeal for help...because I'm totally devoid of creativity and originality....
Comments (14) - January 8, 2007
If we're going to worship someone, how about someone who truly deserves it?
Comments (1) - January 6, 2007
It's time to do the right thing for the right reasons
Comments (1) - January 3, 2007
Glenn Beck railing against radical Buddhism in 3...2...1.... - January 1, 2007
Happy New Year from The Official State Dog of Texas (c) and The Best Dog EVER (c)!
Comments (3) - December 30, 2006
C'mon, now...you weren't using them, anyway.... - December 28, 2006
And the work is really only just beginning - December 27, 2006
How much do I miss this? Not as much as you might think.... - December 25, 2006
Now here's something you're not going to find on Amazon.com - December 25, 2006
I got my Purple Heart in the War on Christmas
Comments (3) - December 23, 2006
And you wonder why the Rabid Right flogs the "War on Christmas" - December 22, 2006
A fashion crime against humanity - December 18, 2006
They call me Scrooge
Comments (2) - December 16, 2006
The truth? Here in America, it's whatever you need it to be.
Comments (10) - December 13, 2006
Revisiting some horrible memories
Comments (7) - December 11, 2006
The gift that keeps on giving
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (-1) - December 9, 2006
Everybody wants to rule the world
Comments (2) - November 30, 2006
This month's meeting will be in my living room - November 29, 2006
Exactly the same...and yet totally different
Comments (6) - November 27, 2006
And you think it's easy being viewed as a sex symbol.... - November 24, 2006
Something that will definitely NOT be on my Christmas list this year - November 21, 2006
Ground Zero (#14) - November 20, 2006
Ground Zero (#13) - November 19, 2006
Ground Zero (#12) - November 18, 2006
Much ado about nothing? Quite likely. - November 18, 2006
Ground Zero (#11) - November 17, 2006
It couldn't have happened to a nicer dickweed - November 17, 2006
Ground Zero (#10) - November 16, 2006
Today's dispatch from The Department of the Blindingly Obvious
Comments (4) - November 16, 2006
Say hello to winter...or not - November 16, 2006
Ground Zero (#9) - November 15, 2006
Ground Zero (#8) - November 14, 2006
Ground Zero (#7) - November 13, 2006
Ground Zero (#6) - November 12, 2006
Ground Zero (#5) - November 11, 2006
Ground Zero (#4)
Comments (2) - November 10, 2006
Ground Zero (#3)
Comments (7) - November 10, 2006
And now, a moment to savor what's been a long time coming....
Comments (3) - November 9, 2006
Ground Zero (#2) - November 8, 2006
Ground Zero (#1)
Comments (1) - November 7, 2006
New York, #11 - November 6, 2006
New York, #10
Comments (2) - November 5, 2006
New York, #9 - November 5, 2006
Nothing like the power of a deadline to lower standards, eh? - November 3, 2006
New York, #7 - October 30, 2006
Another day, another city
Comments (4) - October 30, 2006
New York, #3
Comments (1) - October 30, 2006
Be it ever so humble...it's still not New York
Comments (3) - October 23, 2006
Respect My Authoritah, Please...I'm Just The Substitute - October 23, 2006
The next light you see will be my taillights
Comments (6) - October 21, 2006
Stop the world; it's time to get off - October 20, 2006
Hopelessly, horribly lame...and built to stay that way
Comments (3) - October 14, 2006
"Holier than thou" only means you have farther to fall
Comments (2) - October 10, 2006
Just a random photo of one of my favorite places - October 8, 2006
How many of us could do something similar?
Comments (1) - October 3, 2006
Coincidence? Sure, if you believe in the tooth fairy.... - September 28, 2006
Isn't this what government SHOULD be doing?
Comments (9) - September 27, 2006
Tune in next week, when I'll piss off my four remaining readers....
Comments (8) - September 25, 2006
Coincidence? Uh...not likely....
Comments (3) - September 21, 2006
Just doing what little I can with what little I've got
Comments (4) - September 13, 2006
Well, that will fix everything, eh?
Comments (2) - September 12, 2006
The truth still matters - September 11, 2006
Just another Tuesday morning in September....
Comments (1) - September 11, 2006
We're better than this...aren't we??
Comments (4) - September 3, 2006
Five years...and still broke, obscure, and immature (or, why Sean-Paul Kelley is still my hero)
Comments (12) - September 2, 2006
All I want for Christmas is my 258 MPH...and does that thing have a Hemi in it??
Comments (2) - September 1, 2006
So...the war against cholesterol might not be winnable?
Comments (3) - September 1, 2006
So how long before the cavity searches begin? - August 25, 2006
It's just a matter of time.... - August 21, 2006
Is this really necessary?
Comments (4)| TrackBacks (-1) - August 16, 2006
Greetings from Hell....
Comments (1) - August 12, 2006
Without it, bloggers would be limited to perusing old copies of Penthouse
Comments (2) - August 12, 2006
Now you can be hung like a porn star in less than 21 days
Comments (3) - August 11, 2006
This is why your mother told you to always wear clean underwear
Comments (7) - August 10, 2006
How often must we reopen and revisit this as yet unhealed wound? - August 8, 2006
Can YOU spot the moran...er, moron? - August 7, 2006
So, I was thinking...and you know how dangerous that can be....
Comments (9) - August 6, 2006
Say hello to my new pet peeve
Comments (2) - July 31, 2006
Roll out the Welcome Wagon.... - July 29, 2006
It's about time for the American Taliban to check in
Comments (3) - July 18, 2006
Yes...you, too, can enter the wonderful, remunerative world of blogging!! (or not....) - July 17, 2006
Clueless, offensive...and apparently built to stay that way
Comments (3) - July 12, 2006
Ah, jeez...not this again??
Comments (3) - July 9, 2006
A game for the ages...or a game for the rages?
Comments (1) - July 4, 2006
So who says the inmates aren't running the asylum?
Comments (2) - July 1, 2006
Crashing the gates and sleeping in the Lincoln Bedroom - June 28, 2006
If you don't like being treated like a second-class citizen, you have a simple choice...quit smoking
Comments (5) - June 25, 2006
I get by with a little help from my friends
Comments (4) - June 18, 2006
Happy Fathers Day, y'all.... - June 16, 2006
No, you just cannot make this stuff up....
Comments (1) - June 14, 2006
We all have to die of something...clogged arteries are as good as anything else, eh?
Comments (3) - June 14, 2006
Why can't we just be what we are? - June 13, 2006
Oh, well, that changes everything
Comments (3) - June 13, 2006
So in other words, it's achieved it's desired purpose- tons of free publicity - June 12, 2006
Happy Hurricane Season! - June 8, 2006
Live and learn...and learn...and learn...and learn....
Comments (7) - May 26, 2006
Justice delayed is....
Comments (1) - May 26, 2006
On the Internet, no one can hear you moan
Comments (1) - May 25, 2006
Just when I'd begun to think that humanity couldn't possibly sink any lower....
Comments (2) - May 22, 2006
Another TPRS Public Service - May 19, 2006
Coming to grips with my relationship with food
Comments (5) - May 17, 2006
Be it ever so humble....
Comments (2) - May 11, 2006
Hey, did you remember the Dos Equis??
Comments (5) - May 10, 2006
How long does it take to ruin a life?
Comments (3) - May 8, 2006
A civic duty? Not from where I sit.... - May 5, 2006
Will there ever be a good time for something like this?
Comments (2) - May 1, 2006
This week's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us
Comments (4) - April 29, 2006
It's good to be home - April 28, 2006
Blessed are those of us who can laugh at ourselves, for we shall never cease to be entertained
Comments (2) - April 27, 2006
Thinking about what's truly important - April 24, 2006
Like it or not, it's the wave of the future
Comments (6) - April 22, 2006
Trollwatch 2006 - April 20, 2006
Who says crime doesn't pay? - April 18, 2006
How much is enough?
Comments (1) - April 16, 2006
I'm #1!! - April 14, 2006
I seem to turn up in the strangest places, eh?? (#2)
Comments (1) - April 14, 2006
More unpleasant thoughts on my disgraced Congressman
Comments (6) - April 13, 2006
Seven weeks before we begin playing Weather Roulette - April 6, 2006
South Dakota: Where Forcible Penetration & Family Planning Come Together
Comments (2) - April 5, 2006
Some thoughts on the political passing of a Republican thug - April 3, 2006
One more person, and we have a movement - March 26, 2006
Two years later, and I still can't take it for granted
Comments (1) - March 23, 2006
Talking Heads 'R' Us - March 21, 2006
Say hello to the new boss...same as the old boss, eh? - March 18, 2006
Thank GOD for the Brave, Patriotic Americans at the FCC
Comments (1) - March 13, 2006
Time to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable, eh?
Comments (3) - March 10, 2006
Still angling for my 15 minutes....
Comments (6) - March 8, 2006
So how long before someone has a gripe about this nickname? - March 6, 2006
It's one thing when they're house guests....
Comments (3) - March 1, 2006
White might be right, but it shouldn't be about hate - February 28, 2006
Apparently, it's easier to vent your anger towards cartoons
Comments (3) - February 24, 2006
How much is too much?
Comments (5) - February 24, 2006
D'ya think these will work on Condi?? - February 22, 2006
This job doesn't pay well, but it DOES have it's occasional perks....
Comments (1) - February 20, 2006
Double standard? Udamnbetcha....
Comments (1) - February 19, 2006
Ignorance? Check. Hate-based theology? Check. Violent Extremism? Check. - February 17, 2006
I'm still afraid it's going to have all the power of a riding lawnmower - February 9, 2006
Date movie? Or a test of one's sexual insecurities?
Comments (2) - February 3, 2006
Methinks perhaps someone is taking themselves a wee bit too seriously?
Comments (7) - February 3, 2006
Culture (of corruption) Club - January 28, 2006
Denial: so much more than just a river in Egypt
Comments (1) - January 27, 2006
If you don't have anything nice to say...well, come sit next to me, dear
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (1) - January 26, 2006
When do we hold people responsible for their own stupid decisions?
Comments (3) - January 26, 2006
Principles are all well and good, but ya still gotta answer to the shareholders, eh?
Comments (1) - January 12, 2006
Freedom of speech? Not exactly.... - January 11, 2006
I will never look at a belt sander in quite the same way again - January 10, 2006
Truth or fiction? Or does it even matter?
Comments (5)| TrackBacks (1) - January 4, 2006
Of course I'll respect you in the morning.... ;o) - January 3, 2006
How to be a successful Right Wing (chicken)hawk
Comments (4) - December 30, 2005
2005 DUMB@$$ of the Year Awards
Comments (10)| TrackBacks (2) - December 28, 2005
Remembering a tragedy we cannot begin to grasp - December 25, 2005
Creating an issue where none need exist - December 24, 2005
Another dispatch from the Eastern front in the War on Christmas - December 23, 2005
Things that make you go "Hmm...."
Comments (5) - December 23, 2005
How long should a man pay? Or can he ever fully repay his debt to society?
Comments (1) - December 18, 2005
Now this is scary....
Comments (4) - December 16, 2005
Heh...he said "Boobies".... - December 15, 2005
Jesus saves...but Bill O'Reilly scores on the rebound! - December 14, 2005
We're going to have peace on Earth or die trying, damnit!
Comments (1) - December 13, 2005
It's a imperfect system, and yet we still act as if we cannot see that truth
Comments (2) - December 11, 2005
And I suppose this is what puts the "X" in "Xmas"?? - December 7, 2005
So what do you do when you've already received your gift?
Comments (2) - December 6, 2005
Paging Nathaniel Hawthorne.... - December 5, 2005
Wouldn't it be something if I found all this under the tree on Christmas morning? - November 30, 2005
I really could have lived without knowing this
Comments (7) - November 26, 2005
Seasons Beatings
Comments (3) - November 25, 2005
Here comes Da Judge | TrackBacks (2) - November 24, 2005
And I'd like to thank my parents, without whom none of this would have been possible....
Comments (4) - November 23, 2005
So long...say, wasn't he the dog from "Weekend at Bernie's"?? | TrackBacks (-1) - November 21, 2005
Say hello to the latest addition to the family (cigars will be available in the lobby during intermission)
Comments (3) - November 20, 2005
It's good to know that I'm not just a lonely voice in the wilderness - November 20, 2005
And who says Houston isn't a friendly place? - November 19, 2005
Somebody's got some 'splainin' to do....
Comments (3) - November 8, 2005
The moral equivalent of home movies (#5) - November 8, 2005
Sometimes, life just ain't fair
Comments (2) - November 6, 2005
Jeez, you'd think the FEC would have bigger fish to fry....
Comments (1) - November 6, 2005
The moral equivalent of home movies (#4) - November 5, 2005
The moral equivalent of home movies (#3)
Comments (1) - November 4, 2005
You'll take what you're given and you'll be grateful to get it
Comments (1) - November 3, 2005
The moral equivalent of home movies (#2) - November 3, 2005
Just another morning in Paradise - November 3, 2005
Why We're Republicans - November 1, 2005
The moral equivalent of home movies (#1) - November 1, 2005
Not exactly a birth announcement, but....
Comments (5) - February 23, 2005
Be careful what you ask for....
Comments (4) - February 21, 2005
Death of an icon - February 16, 2005
So who says there's no Bogeyman? - February 15, 2005
Sacrilege or flattery?
Comments (4) - February 13, 2005
Assistance from a distance?
Comments (5) - February 12, 2005
Give us you trite, your trendy, your overexposed
Comments (3) - February 10, 2005
Don't cry for me, Carly Fiorina
Comments (2) - February 7, 2005
Just another enforced exile in Paradise - February 3, 2005
So where do we draw the line...or is there even a line to be drawn? - February 2, 2005
This is America: land of the free, home of the Urban Assault Vehicles
Comments (2) - February 1, 2005
How long before those with high blood pressure are filing for unemployment benefits?
Comments (8) - February 1, 2005
My adoring public checks in
Comments (3) - January 31, 2005
This HERO's kidney belong in a Hall of Fame somewhere.... - January 29, 2005
Time to recognize the risks our children face - January 27, 2005
Never forget....
Comments (2) - January 27, 2005
Desperate measures for desperate times - January 26, 2005
We support meaningless, commercialized, jingoistic Groupthink
Comments (4) - January 21, 2005
Visionary or ghoul? | TrackBacks (1) - January 19, 2005
The Carnival of the Vanities, #122
Comments (11)| TrackBacks (12) - January 18, 2005
Time to recognize that we CAN make a difference - January 6, 2005
And it was handmade by Chinese political prisoners....
Comments (2) - January 5, 2005
When the gods want to punish you, they answer your prayers
Comments (3) - January 1, 2005
Of course, when you start the year off with a story like this, how could you POSSIBLY sink any lower??
Comments (2) - December 31, 2004
Still more frivolity from the TPRS Poster Boy
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (1) - December 28, 2004
This all seems like a very bad dream
Comments (3) - December 26, 2004
It was a very special Christmas - December 23, 2004
So much for making an impression....
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (1) - December 22, 2004
Time for a Hurricane warning - December 21, 2004
Your tax dollars at work
Comments (10) - December 20, 2004
Meet the machine responsible for sucking my brains out while I sleep - December 19, 2004
OK, but who's the smirking f*****g moron next to the two dead white guys?
Comments (9)| TrackBacks (1) - December 16, 2004
Whither my own political dreams?
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (1) - December 15, 2004
Efficient law enforcement or Big Brother?
Comments (1) - December 10, 2004
Greetings from Paradise
Comments (2) - December 7, 2004
You don't need to walk the walk as long as you talk the talk
Comments (8) - December 7, 2004
Just keeping things real - December 1, 2004
A case of the tail wagging the dog? - November 30, 2004
Exiting the Dark Side stage left
Comments (4) - November 28, 2004
What are we so afraid of?
Comments (6) - November 26, 2004
This is not got to solve anything
Comments (6) - November 25, 2004
Happy Football...er, Turkey Day, y'all!!
Comments (1) - November 23, 2004
If it's too loud, you're too old!! - November 22, 2004
Another round with Asshole Neighbor
Comments (11) - November 18, 2004
Damn...well, maybe next year....
Comments (4) - November 16, 2004
Surprisingly enough, not much happens this early in the morning....
Comments (4) - November 11, 2004
Sometimes a picture really does say it all
Comments (1) - November 10, 2004
What other weapons do the "little people" have?
Comments (2) - November 8, 2004
An interview with myself (Part One)
Comments (10) - November 7, 2004
A small contribution
Comments (1) - November 4, 2004
To the victor goes the spoils
Comments (7)| TrackBacks (1) - November 2, 2004
Now all we can do is wait....
Comments (5) - November 2, 2004
We have allowed this to be a pejorative for far too long
Comments (3) - November 1, 2004
In the end, all we have is each other
Comments (5) - October 25, 2004
IT'S ALIVE!!!! - October 25, 2004
Sometimes, you really can make a difference - October 22, 2004
Yes, and the trolls shall always be among us
Comments (15) - October 21, 2004
Brain dead and proud of it - October 14, 2004
Happy Anniversary, sweetheart....
Comments (5) - October 11, 2004
An improvement, or just my way of scaring the hell out of kids on Halloween?
Comments (4) - October 1, 2004
The Prevaricator-in-Chief takes a well-deserved drubbing
Comments (13)| TrackBacks (1) - October 1, 2004
Your own personal (fiberglass) Jesus
Comments (2) - September 30, 2004
Damn, this would look good under the tree, honey.... ;0)
Comments (4) - September 28, 2004
Tool of the Devil?...or just another out-of-control corporation with visions of world domination? - September 25, 2004
It's not pretty being easy.... - September 21, 2004
Leave it to someone who's not even an American citizen to call us on the carpet
Comments (7) - September 20, 2004
Gee, honey, wouldn't this would look good in the driveway??
Comments (7)| TrackBacks (1) - September 19, 2004
How long before mandatory strip searches?
Comments (6) - September 18, 2004
You might have better luck with some flowers and candles - September 16, 2004
This week's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us - September 15, 2004
The People's Republic of Seabrook: Now 99.9% Comment-Spam Free!
Comments (1) - September 14, 2004
Welcome to my brave new world
Comments (4) - September 10, 2004
Honey, who replaced the trailer with a two-bedroom ranch? WTF???
Comments (1) - September 10, 2004
Bigger doesn't have to mean better
Comments (3) - September 9, 2004
Comments Requested on New Look
Comments (3) - September 9, 2004
The TPRS Housekeeping Department checks in
Comments (2) - September 7, 2004
Coincidence? We think not....
Comments (2) - September 5, 2004
So what exactly constitutes victory?
Comments (1) - September 3, 2004
Three years worth of attitude. Happy birthday to me....
Comments (13) - September 1, 2004
C'mon...it's not supposed to be funny; they're Republicans
Comments (6) - August 31, 2004
If you love a child, why would you abuse that child?
Comments (4) - August 30, 2004
Welcome back to the world
Comments (2) - August 28, 2004
Back in the saddle again
Comments (1) - August 27, 2004
The last train out of town leaves this evening, and I plan to be on it
Comments (1) - August 24, 2004
Mohammed goes to the mountain - August 22, 2004
I just flew in...and boy are my arms tired - August 20, 2004
And you thought indentured servitude was dead - August 19, 2004
I feel like I've been given the key to the city - August 17, 2004
Someone needs to look out for the children- it's not like the mother is - August 15, 2004
Memo to Miami drivers: you could learn something here
Comments (1) - August 10, 2004
It sucks when the tables are turned, eh?
Comments (2) - August 10, 2004
Make it happen - August 9, 2004
It's a freeway, not a Formula One track, y'all.... - August 9, 2004
Coming soon to a store near you- just in time for Christmas - August 8, 2004
I always hate it when my dreams get deflated
Comments (4) - August 7, 2004
Who says history can't be beautiful? - August 6, 2004
Greetings from Paradise
Comments (1) - August 2, 2004
Something tells me I'm not in Minnesota - August 2, 2004
You never get a second chance to make a first impression
Comments (7) - August 2, 2004
Sometimes all it takes is one extraordinary person
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (4) - August 1, 2004
They call me Gator Bait.... - August 1, 2004
I love travelling...it's the getting there I hate - July 31, 2004
Such a lonely boy....
Comments (1) - July 28, 2004
Yeah, but can you get the Playboy Channel on that thing??
Comments (1) - July 27, 2004
This is still a free country- unless, of course, you're a professional athlete
Comments (3) - July 24, 2004
So much for Eric's college fund
Comments (3) - July 17, 2004
And how, exactly, is this man a threat to anyone but himself? - July 14, 2004
Perhaps there may be hope for humanity....
Comments (1) - July 9, 2004
Today- the Poop Report; Tomorrow- The New York $#*)^&% Times??
Comments (1) - July 8, 2004
There ought to be an HOV lane to Hell for people like this
Comments (1) - July 6, 2004
Fighting the good fight
Comments (8) - July 4, 2004
Truly, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself - July 3, 2004
Well, at least I don't have to worry about her stealing the covers
Comments (8) - July 2, 2004
So who is this man?
Comments (1) - July 2, 2004
The words of a prophet are often ignored
Comments (2) - June 24, 2004
Yes, Virginia, there are some things more important than this %#?&@ weblog, Chapter 2
Comments (1) - June 23, 2004
Yes, Virginia, there are some things more important than this %#?&@ weblog
Comments (1) - June 23, 2004
It can also be used to loosen those pesky lag bolts
Comments (5) - June 23, 2004
Wait a minute, I kind of like my own little world - June 21, 2004
Back to the future
Comments (3)| TrackBacks (5) - June 20, 2004
A dress rehearsal for Empty Nest Syndrome
Comments (2) - June 19, 2004
Your tax dollars at work...or not
Comments (6) - June 14, 2004
People sure can be a**wipes, eh?
Comments (11)| TrackBacks (8) - June 4, 2004
Not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer, are we?
Comments (4)| TrackBacks (2) - June 1, 2004
The passing of a giant - May 31, 2004
Imagine walking into a sauna encased in Saran Wrap....
Comments (1) - May 28, 2004
No, but if you hang on, I might be able to dig up some recent nude photos of Helen Thomas or Bette White
Comments (1) - May 24, 2004
Piss into the wind and two things are likely to happen: 1) You get wet, and 2) You end up smelling badly
Comments (7)| TrackBacks (7) - May 21, 2004
Greetings from Texas- we're an Equal Opportunity Executioner | TrackBacks (1) - May 20, 2004
Welcome to my head- anybody want to trade places for a day??
Comments (1) - May 19, 2004
Thankfully, I don't look good in white - May 17, 2004
Are we to be content with sacrificial lambs? - May 14, 2004
So much for claiming the moral high ground
Comments (1) - May 13, 2004
It's so much easier when you're doing the Lord's work
Comments (6) - May 12, 2004
Just in case there was any doubt about their utter lack of humanity
Comments (3)| TrackBacks (1) - May 9, 2004
The best laid plans....
Comments (2) - May 6, 2004
OK, so I'm a heretic....
Comments (3) - May 5, 2004
Can we please talk about something that matters now? Today??
Comments (5) - May 4, 2004
Yet more on the vision thang - May 1, 2004
Not bad for a 41-year-old retired American League pitcher, eh? - April 30, 2004
Too bad I could never hit a curveball
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (8) - April 27, 2004
Much ado about nothing
Comments (1) - April 26, 2004
More on the vision thang - April 25, 2004
I never learned this in Sunday School - April 22, 2004
War is Peace, Ignorance is Knowledge, Obedience is Power....
Comments (2) - April 21, 2004
Back to the future...
Comments (1) - April 20, 2004
Hey, I'm a Liberal...what a shock!
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (1) - April 19, 2004
For one day at least, it was good to be King. - April 18, 2004
But wait, damnit...I'm too young to be this damn old....
Comments (12)| TrackBacks (1) - April 17, 2004
There is, apparently, no truth to the rumor that he will be deployed to the Sunni Triangle
Comments (6) - April 16, 2004
The vision thing (continued...)
Comments (2) - April 15, 2004
Remember, purple IS the color of royalty
Comments (2) - April 14, 2004
And pets never ask if it was good for you, too - April 13, 2004
CLEAVAGE!!! We must have cleavage!! - April 12, 2004
The truth? You can't handle the truth!
Comments (1) - April 11, 2004
It's not often I'm able to say "cold and blustery" with having to use "Ann Coulter" in the same sentence - April 11, 2004
If only it were so easy.... - April 10, 2004
The vision thing
Comments (1) - April 9, 2004
Recognizing a life lived outside the box
Comments (4)| TrackBacks (1) - April 9, 2004
It could be worse; I could have majored in colonic hydrotherapy - April 8, 2004
It's all just a little bit of history repeating
Comments (2) - April 8, 2004
If you see a small hole in the floor, run like Hell
Comments (2) - April 7, 2004
Beauty is where you find it, and Monday it was in Galveston
Comments (2) - April 6, 2004
Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory
Comments (2) - April 4, 2004
I wasn't aware that God was in the infanticide business
Comments (4) - April 3, 2004
So when do I get my check??
Comments (4)| TrackBacks (1) - April 2, 2004
One week later....
Comments (1) - March 30, 2004
Truth? In a case like this, it often lags far beind the character assassination.
Comments (1) - March 29, 2004
Day 4: Things look a bit different these days - March 28, 2004
Day 3: Jack learns how to see again
Comments (1) - March 27, 2004
Life is a blur...no, really
Comments (5) - March 26, 2004
One nation, "under God"...but whose God?
Comments (10) - March 25, 2004
Sure, doc, but will I be able to play the piano after the surgery??
Comments (5) - March 24, 2004
In other words, we're all equal, as long as our skin isn't white?
Comments (5) - March 23, 2004
Sometimes, politics really IS local - March 22, 2004
No, you probably won't notice me, but that's the way I like it - March 21, 2004
In cyberspace, mean people still suck
Comments (1) - March 20, 2004
Perhaps Josef Goebbels was onto something....
Comments (5) - March 19, 2004
Greetings from Hell. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
Comments (6) - March 18, 2004
It says here it's a man's world. I wonder sometimes if that's such a good thing....
Comments (1) - March 17, 2004
So when, exactly, is a debt finally paid?
Comments (8) - March 16, 2004
Hey, come on now...if it were important, it would be in "People" magazine.... - March 15, 2004
Or we could just call it International Piss Off A Vegan Day
Comments (1) - March 14, 2004
Wait; wasn't the world supposed to come to an end or something??
Comments (6) - March 13, 2004
It's the little things, and you never know it until they're gone
Comments (1) - March 12, 2004
There is only so much a poor writer can do, no?
Comments (6)| TrackBacks (5) - March 11, 2004
This will become an issue only when "body count" appears in the box scores
Comments (6)| TrackBacks (1) - March 10, 2004
Now I'm all confused....
Comments (3) - March 10, 2004
Yeah, but at least there are no mosquitoes within a 40-mile radius
Comments (5) - March 9, 2004
The "United" States of America? I wonder sometimes....
Comments (3) - March 8, 2004
In the end, it's about who calls the shots - March 7, 2004
At least this morning, all of the planets are aligned - March 6, 2004
It's not easy being Austin's Invisible Man - March 5, 2004
This cannot be allowed to stand
Comments (12) - March 4, 2004
This is a start, but the heavy lifting needs to be done at home
Comments (3) - March 3, 2004
Sometimes, you really can't solve all problems
Comments (5) - March 2, 2004
Is it news or is it a commercial? Or is there even a difference?
Comments (1) - March 1, 2004
All we need is an aircraft carrier for these things to land on.... - February 29, 2004
When do we stop looking backward and try to make today's world a better place?
Comments (8)| TrackBacks (6) - February 28, 2004
And the narrow-minded shall always be among us
Comments (5) - February 27, 2004
Nice try, but the baseball gods aren't big into explosives - February 25, 2004
My love-hate relationship with technology continues....
Comments (5) - February 24, 2004
We have nothing to fear but...well, pretty much everything
Comments (7) - February 23, 2004
Does anyone remember when we used to able to have substantive debates- about real issues??
Comments (3) - February 22, 2004
Let's get it right the first time, shall we??
Comments (7) - February 21, 2004
It's a dog-eat-dog world, and I'm wearing Milk Bone underwear
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (3) - February 20, 2004
Anyone want to buy a parka?? It's not like I'll be needing it....
Comments (6) - February 19, 2004
So when do I get to achieve my dreams?
Comments (2) - February 18, 2004
Repeat after me: "It's only a movie...."
Comments (4) - February 18, 2004
Just in case you were wondering
Comments (1) - February 13, 2004
Well, I suppose it beats being known for having a bad football team - February 13, 2004
This employee is DEFINITELY destined for management
Comments (2) - February 11, 2004
Jimmy Hoffa's body found!! Film @ 11!!
Comments (2) - February 9, 2004
Translation, please?? - February 7, 2004
Despite what y'all may think, this IS progress
Comments (4) - February 7, 2004
I'll take this seriously when they start bleating about the real problem
Comments (1) - February 5, 2004
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away....
Comments (2) - February 4, 2004
Am I the only one who thinks this is silly?
Comments (6) - January 30, 2004
So what are we teaching our children??
Comments (4)| TrackBacks (3) - January 27, 2004
The stupid will always be among us, no?? - January 25, 2004
It may be fashionable to hate them, but we might just learn a thing or two from them
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (1) - January 23, 2004
The Boo Chronicles (cont.)
Comments (1) - January 22, 2004
Racist? Or just bad advertising??
Comments (37) - January 22, 2004
Sure, it's funny, but it really isn't
Comments (5) - January 18, 2004
It really was easier when you could any color you wanted- as long as it was black
Comments (1)| TrackBacks (1) - January 16, 2004
Mine eyes have seen the glory
Comments (3) - January 16, 2004
Being Chinese can have it's advantages, eh? - January 7, 2004
In a perfect world...well, it would be a perfect world
Comments (5) - January 3, 2004
OK, y'all; no more deer testicles. We've got all we need, thanks....
Comments (2)| TrackBacks (1) - January 2, 2004
So much for equal rights, eh?
Comments (1) - December 28, 2003
Blame Canada....
Comments (5) - December 27, 2003
And this is why some people should not be allowed to breed
Comments (1) - December 26, 2003
Let us never forget - December 25, 2003
What's so funny about peace, love, and understanding?
Comments (1) - December 25, 2003
And this, kids, is why it takes a real man to be an elf - December 24, 2003
Fun with Faux News - December 15, 2003
If you're going to condemn something, at least know what you're talking about
Comments (1) - December 7, 2003
When I looked outside at my palm tree this morning, this is NOT what I saw.... - December 3, 2003
And you think the holidays with your family are wierd?? - December 2, 2003
Sometimes, a picture really is worth a thousand words
Comments (1) - November 29, 2003
Read it and weep - November 24, 2003
Time for some cautious optimism or some optimistic caution? - November 23, 2003
My God can beat up your God
Comments (4) - November 23, 2003
Well, that would explain the kneepads the women got at orientation, eh?? - November 18, 2003
Bacon and eggs again? (Or, "So this is why the house always smells like fried food?")
Comments (1) - November 2, 2003
From the "Department of Self-Promotion" Department
Comments (1) - November 2, 2003
Now, I may have been a History major, but if it sounds too good to be true....
Comments (2) - October 31, 2003
Welcome to Jerry Springer Nation
Comments (6)| TrackBacks (3) - October 31, 2003
Making friends is not as overrated as you might think
Comments (3) - October 18, 2003
We're #1!! - October 10, 2003
Of course, they missed the toasted English Muffins just up the trail - October 1, 2003
Tonight on "When Animals Attack"....
Comments (11) - September 29, 2003
More shameless self-promotion from the TPRS poster boy, #9
Comments (3) - September 27, 2003
More shameless self-promotion from the TPRS poster boy, #8
Comments (1) - September 22, 2003
Whatever happened to common sense?
Comments (1) - September 11, 2003
9.11.03
Comments (1) - September 4, 2003
It's not good news, but at least it's news
Comments (2) - September 2, 2003
No, this apparently wasn't a Yassir Arafat sighting - August 31, 2003
Random musings on a rainy Sunday morning
Comments (3)| TrackBacks (1) - August 26, 2003
So, what exactly have I missed over the past week?? - August 17, 2003
Like they need more traffic, eh? | TrackBacks (1) - August 6, 2003
Misplaced priorities? I'll say.
Comments (4) - August 3, 2003
Sunday morning free association - July 31, 2003
It doesn't look like much, and, well...it isn't
Comments (2) - July 30, 2003
Alive and well and living on South Padre Island - July 27, 2003
It's a little known historical fact that many pivotal Civil War battles were fought in Seattle - July 26, 2003
On to the next big thing
Comments (1) - July 13, 2003
A caffeine buzz, or a contribution to global poverty?? - July 12, 2003
You wanna piece of this??
Comments (1) - July 12, 2003
Well, it is safer than declaring war on Turkey
Comments (1) - July 7, 2003
This is proof that history is more than just one damn thing after another - July 5, 2003
Gluttony turns pro - July 1, 2003
It's not easy being the Great Satan - July 1, 2003
Sorry, but Louisiana can have it - June 30, 2003
And now for the audience participation portion of our show....
Comments (7) - June 28, 2003
That's why it's called a food chain, y'all - June 17, 2003
You have only one Father, but anyone who cares can become a Dad - June 1, 2003
There's a time and a place for that, and it's called COLLEGE!
Comments (6) - May 30, 2003
Am I the only one thinking that this doesn't quite add up? - May 26, 2003
Everybody loves baby pictures...right??
Comments (13) - May 26, 2003
No politically-oriented philosophizing is allowed before breakfast - May 25, 2003
Perhaps we could just stay home and rent some movies?? - May 21, 2003
And now for the audience participation portion of our show....
Comments (31)| TrackBacks (3) - May 19, 2003
History: it's just one damn thing after another - May 13, 2003
Has anyone noticed the difference??
Comments (1) - May 12, 2003
Give 500 Monkeys Movable Type and get outta the way.... - May 10, 2003
My God can beat up your god - May 9, 2003
Hey, at least I'm not France
Comments (3)| TrackBacks (1) - May 8, 2003
Perhaps you can go home again??
Comments (2) - May 4, 2003
Protecting ourselves from ourselves?
Comments (5) - April 19, 2003
Justice delayed is not justice denied
Comments (1) - April 15, 2003
Much ado about (almost) nothing
Comments (5) - April 13, 2003
Too much?
Comments (1) - March 27, 2003
More than bread and circuses - March 25, 2003
If it saves one child.... - March 16, 2003
Idaho files for Chapter 7 bankruptcy: Film at 11
Comments (1) - March 9, 2003
So much for swift justice - March 6, 2003
I've always wanted to be a minority - March 5, 2003
Carnival of the Vanities, Episode 24 - March 1, 2003
Translation please.... - March 1, 2003
Gee, she really meant to kill me?? - February 26, 2003
Carnival of the Vanities, Episode 23 - February 21, 2003
It's good to be King - February 20, 2003
You want the truth? YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!
Comments (8) - February 18, 2003
Carnival of the Vanities deadline
Comments (2) - February 16, 2003
It's all about the Benjamins - February 11, 2003
Thank you, Master of the Obvious
Comments (1) - February 10, 2003
Where do you draw the line?
Comments (9) - January 25, 2003
Natural selection at work again
Comments (2) - January 24, 2003
Billions and billions...er, lost
Comments (2) - January 22, 2003
"When you come into my kitchen, it's war - January 19, 2003
It's called a "control" for a reason, eh?
Comments (1) - January 16, 2003
Sure, but is it "Fair and Balanced"?? - January 15, 2003
And I promise only to use it for good, not for evil
Comments (4) - January 14, 2003
There's nothing quite like being generalized, eh?
Comments (2) - January 10, 2003
Hey, Mom! I'm abstinent!! - January 4, 2003
Really? When did this happen? | TrackBacks (1) - January 4, 2003
So which comes first? - January 3, 2003
(Virtually) Free Speech
Comments (1) - December 28, 2002
Would you like blue eyes or brown?
Comments (3) - December 28, 2002
Macroeconomics made (too) simple - December 18, 2002
WWJD? Probably a burro....
Comments (5) - December 14, 2002
Another one of life's mysteries - December 13, 2002
My night as a lab rat
Comments (5) - December 11, 2002
And can you explain the jackhammer in my head??
Comments (2) - December 9, 2002
WWJD? Who cares? He doesn't have a license.
Comments (9)| TrackBacks (1) - November 30, 2002
Help the technically (and aesthetically) challenged help themselves
Comments (9) - November 30, 2002
And now, a Public Service Announcement
Comments (1) - November 29, 2002
This is why I love the South | TrackBacks (1) - November 28, 2002
Finally, some news I can use
Comments (1) - November 25, 2002
Test your knowledge
Comments (15) - November 24, 2002
A little light housekeeping
Comments (4) - November 22, 2002
I'm willing to forgive, but I rarely forget
Comments (1) - November 22, 2002
And now for something completely different - November 19, 2002
Just how much are your moral standards worth??
Comments (1) - November 13, 2002
And now for something completely different....
Comments (2) - November 6, 2002
Sometimes the music IS the message - October 25, 2002
A million here, a million there....
Comments (1) - October 23, 2002
Electronic bandits
Comments (2) - October 23, 2002
No pun intended? Really?? - October 15, 2002
Now THIS is science....
Comments (4) - October 15, 2002
Lacking in self-esteem? Good for you!
Comments (1) - October 7, 2002
The gift that keeps on giving
Comments (1) - October 6, 2002
A night at the Seabrook Music Festival
Comments (1) - September 30, 2002
Deja vu all over again - September 24, 2002
Gerard Vlemmings Rules!
Comments (1) - September 22, 2002
Hi! I'm Isidore, and I'd like to hurt you.... - September 20, 2002
The Internet really IS a vast wasteland - September 20, 2002
Free enterprise at an all-time low - September 18, 2002
From a different perspective - September 17, 2002
100 words every college student should know
Comments (1) - September 15, 2002
Remembering what is truly important
Comments (2) - September 9, 2002
Lessons learned
Comments (1) - September 2, 2002
Locations, locations, locations....
Comments (3) - September 2, 2002
An interesting idea? Or just another reason to cook out and drink beer? - August 23, 2002
Dealing with a drought takes on a different meaning in the desert - August 20, 2002
Invasion of privacy, or protecting the greater good?
Comments (1)
