One of the local radio stations here in Houston (if you live here, you probably know which one I'm referring to) does this shtick every Thursday morning called "The War of the Roses". The short version is that people send emails to the station, advising why they feel the need to test the loyalty of their "significant other". The hosts pick one "lucky" entrant and then call the person whose loyalty to the relationship is in question. Posing as a telemarketer for a new floral business, one host offers the unwitting victim (on [presumably] live radio) a dozen free roses, which can be delivered free-of-charge to the person of their choice.
The idea, of course, is to test the victim. Will they send it to their "significant other", or is there someone else that they would choose to send the flowers to? Once this is established, the host blows her cover, explains the real purpose behind the call, and then brings the "significant other" (who has been listening in the whole time) into the conversation. Much hilarity generally ensues....
Of course, if the unwitting victims had half a brain, they'd be able to figure out that something is up. These calls are made at about 7.15am (unless, of course, they're taped, in which case my argument falls apart completely). By federal law, telemarketing calls can only be made between 8am and 9pm local time. You'd think that someone would pick up on the fact that these calls are made just a wee bit too early in the morning....
The first time I heard this travesty, a woman who was eight months pregnant was having suspicions about her husband. So, when offered the free flowers, he wanted to send them to a dancer at a strip club. When the wife came on the line, you can imagine the weeping and gnashing of teeth that ensued. Listening to this unfold, I felt dirty. Why, I thought, do I need to bear witness to the unravelling of what was most likely once a loving relationship? And what would possess someone to want to air their dirty laundry over the airwaves for the entire Houston metropolitan area to hear?
I enjoy the radio station, but I find myself offended by this naked, shameless ratings ploy. Is it really necessary to trade on the pain and dupliciity of others in order to be to increase your advertising rates? Of course, the reality is that we listeners secretly LOVE this sort of trash. Hearing the tragedies of others played out on the radio helps to make us feel better about our own situations- "Gee, my life definitely sucks, but at least I don't have to worry about THAT!"
Now when "The War of the Roses" comes on, I switch stations. It's a silent protest that in the end will likely have no impact at all. Even so, if enough of y'all feel as I do, try switching stations. Eventually, perhaps these trolls will get the message.
I can't help but wonder what it is about American society that revels in the pain, suffering, and betrayal of others? Have we all turned into some sort of White Trash Trailer Park Nation, where anything goes and the normal rules of decorum and respect for others no longer apply? Apparently so- and I think we're all poorer for it.
