Stinging Debate: Parents Divided Over Practice of ‘Hot Saucing’ as a Form of Discipline
There's no room for pain and humiliation and fear in disciplining healthy children. I think it's a rather barbaric practice to say the least.
- Boston family therapist Carleton Kendrick
It does sting and the memory stays with them so that the next time they may actually have some self-control and stop before they lie or bite or something like that.... It's totally against popular opinion in culture these days. I prefer my child receive a small amount of pain from my hand of love than to encounter a lot more pain in life.
- Lisa Whelchel
Of all the things I thought I'd ever be offering my opinion on, disciplining children was NOT on the list. Given that I've never had any children of my own, I can hardly be considered an expert on child-rearing. Even so, I do know despicable when I see it, and THIS is it.
The practice of "hot saucing" a child's tongue as a method of discipline may seem cruel to some parents, but those who regularly use the punishment say it teaches their charges valuable and long-lasting lessons.
Valuable and long-lasting lessons? What, like child abuse in the name of discipline is acceptable? Like even though your parents are willing to abuse you, they're doing it out of love? Give me a break. What's next, rubbing a child's nose in a pile of dog poo while yelling "NO!!" at them?
Practices at childcare centers in Michigan and Georgia were called into question after it was discovered that workers used hot sauce to discipline some of the children.
Kendrick says even parents who endorse corporal punishment should think twice about using hot sauce to discipline children because it could lead to an investigation of child abuse in some states.
"The state of Virginia, for instance, calls this practice bizarre and finds it an actionable offense," Kendrick said.
I understand the need to discipline children. This is perhaps a parent's most solemn and serious responsibility, one that should not be minimized nor made light of. That being said, if "hot-saucing" is the best that you can come up with, you deserve to be charged with child abuse, because that is EXACTLY what you are guilty of.
If you cannot come up with a more humane method for teaching your children the difference between right and wrong, you do not deserve to be a parent. Teaching your children the difference should not have to involve crossing that line yourself.
I realize that I may be jumping into an argument which is far beyond my expertise, but sometimes right and wrong are very clearly defined, even for the uninitiated. This is one of those times.
Spanking -- yes or no?
No. While I understand the arguments for spanking, my own experience is my guide here. My father spanked me, and all it taught me was fear and resentment. Yes, I suppose in the end (no pun intended) I also learned the desired lesson, but I do not believe that a loving parent needs to resort to physical violence.
At what point does spanking cross the line to child abuse? Parenting requires creativity of thought when it comes to disciplining a child. All spanking requires is brute force.
I was raised by a pediatric social worker who's job it was to remove children from abusive homes. I think this does constitute abuse.
My punishments growing up, as you might have guessed, sucked. Standing in a corner is as boring as it gets and didn't teach me a damned thing, except how to stand in one place for a long time (good practice for the DMV!).
What's next, the mild electric shock to their genitals to keep them from touching themselves?
Thanks for listing my blog on your site.
What bothers me about this type of punishment is this -- its not about discipline at all, its about power, and the abuse of power.
I have raised two children, who are now adults but who still love me. In my experience, a swat on the rear should be done in the heat of the moment and mainly to reinforce a warning -- like, hey, don't you EVER move a hot pot off the stove! Don't you EVER run with a pencil in your mouth! - that type of thing. This hotsauce thing is done deliberately, in the "cool" of the moment, and that makes it mean and cruel.
Let's check back with these women in 50 or 60 years, and see how quickly their children are clapping them into the nursing home.