After a week and a half here in Houston, I think I've finally managed to adapt to the realities on the ground. Yes, I've seen some nasty stuff, and it's not a lot of fun being here. This is no mere business trip for me. Having lived here previously, this one is absolutely personal. Is that a good reason for me to be here? I suppose that's debatable. I do have some pronounced advantages over every other member of our catastrophe team because I know Houston. That's been a plus. The flip side is that the things I've seen and experienced really have hit me very hard on a personal level. That's been a minus. Finally, though, I think I've managed to find a place from where I can manage to do my job, recognize that I'm doing some good things, and maintain my focus. In my line of work, professional detachment can be a good thing. It's taken me awhile to get into the rhythm of what I'm here to do, but I feel like I've finally been able to do it. What it means is that the destruction, devastation, and suffering are things that I can only impact in marginal ways...so I'll do my best to do what I can to the best of my ability and hope that's enough.
If I live to be 105 and never see or experience anything like what I've seen here over the past 10 days, I will die a happy man. For now, though, I'm going to try and do what Iittle I'm able to do as best I can and hope that will be enough. It's going to have to be. When I strip everything else away, I'm incredibly fortunate. Eventually, I will be returning to an intact home. Thankfully, I won't have to returning to a town where every home, every structure, was leveled. Except one. I won't be returning to a home where the debris gathered from storm-ravaged homes is now five feet high. I won't be living in a tent city. Yes, I will leave (thankfully), but thousands, perhaps millions, here will be dealing with the aftermath for weeks and months. Then again, if the biggest problem you have is that you can't go swimming in the Gulf of Mexico, you might want to pick up some tools and help your neighbors clean up their properties.
Being here a year after I moved has done nothing if not validate my decision to move to Portland. I'd almost forgotten what a fugly, uninviting place Houston, and indeed all of southeast Texas, is. Then again, once you get past the heat, the humidity, the traffic, the pollution, the ridiculous distances involved in getting anywhere, the refineries, and the mosquitoes...well, Houston's just this side of Paradise. In all honesty, I hate being back here. I look around, and I can't help but wonder why I spent ten years of my life in such a miserable, god-forsaken place. What in the Hell was I thinking?? If I could separate Seabrook from the rest of the things I hate about Texas, I might still be here. A year later, though, and I really do feel as if my decision has been validated by this trip. I'm glad to be here and helping in what small manner I'm able, but it comes time for me to go home to Portland...well, there won't be any tears shed.
Just keep this in mind, y'all...I hate Houston, NOT the people who live here.
