Letterman: Top Ten Ways The GOP Can Become More Hip: Perhaps David Letterman would be better served trying to accomplish something that's actually doable.
Check Your Burgers: E. Coli Season Is Coming: Hey, just do what I did almost 20 years ago: stop eating red meat. Problem solved, eh?
Cleveland Browns Wide Receiver Kills Florida Pedestrian With His Bentley: Well, it was either that or kindness....
AIG Paying Millions in Bonuses Despite Receiving Federal Bailout: AIG to American taxpayers: "(&^% you!!"
Jim Cramer, CNBC Ratings Down Since Stewart Attacks Began: Yes, karma can be a real b---h....
Police briefs: Woman strips naked, knocks on doors: Uh, no; no one knocked on my door last night. Why do your ask?
Bush policy institute 'unlikely' to 'emphasize' the Iraq war: Now matter how hard you scrub, a turd is always going to be a turd.
Prospect High teacher charged with inappropriate relationship with student*: And now the school's male students are starting to feel left out.
Karl Rove Falsely Claims He Never Threatened Anybody Who Disagreed With Him: This just in: Karl Rove is a liar and a thug. Who knew??
Russian strategic bombers could use Cuba airfields: Uh, 1962 called; they want their missile crisis back.
McCain Objects To Interior Nominee Because He Once Compared Ronald Reagan To George W. Bush: Bipartisanship: John McCain wouldn't recognize it if it snuck up and bit him on the ass.
Bacon Tattoos: Girls, you just KNOW men love bacon, right? So, if you're trying to attract a man...well, what better way than with a bacon tattoo...and a pair of knee pads??
