The American Family Association’s Bryan Fischer writes about important relgious issues, so of course his attention today turns to those heathen American Indians who were righteously defeated by the kind, ethical, Christian cowboys. American presidents have traditionally always been pro-cowboy in this epic struggle. But then Barack Obama got elected. “President Obama wants to give the entire land mass of the United States of America back to the Indians,” Fischer says. “He wants Indian tribes to be our new overlords.” And what’s more, Obama is in league with the U.N., which owns property on the isle of Manhattan formerly owned by Native Americans, to make this happen.
I suppose I should admit to being surprised that it’s taken so long for Barack Obama’s double-secret plan to be uncovered. Damn, it should have been so obvious. When he campaigned against extending tax cuts for the wealthy, what else could it have been but code for “I want to return America to those who rightful own it: the Sioux Nation”?
Full disclosure: having resolved to find other things to write about besides religion, Bryan Fischer in his infinite generosity has left me a large opening: the astonishing depths of human stupidity posing as moral beacon. Truly, in Fischer we’re talking about a barrel with no bottom, but a lack of decency or native intelligence has never held Fischer back from making stuff up as it pops into his pointy lil’l haid.
In a perfect world, I’d ignore Fischer and hope that karma kicks him in the ass. Of course, my world is anything but perfect, so I’m left to wonder how someone as clearly in need of sedation is allowed to represent an organization that believes itself to be “Christian”. Right; if AFA is a Christian organization, then I’m going to be the Grandmaster at this year’s Festival of Roses Gay Pride Parade.
Then again, if Native Americans are to be our new overlords, I can’t help but believe that they couldn’t possibly screw things up any more than the current White Conservative power structure has….
You’ll know we’re in trouble when a bill is introduced in Congress that would establish lacrosse as the national sport….